My father died suddenly may 2016, I've had a hard time figuring out how to understand the balance between life and death, I've lost about 50 people in my 30 years on this blue marble, but losing a parent is a much harder thing to deal with. For a long before my dad died, I was very angry at God, but I've come to see it as how can I be mad at something I'm not convinced exists. Rightfully so in my views, because what kind of all loving God steals so much from 1 person. Sorry I guess I'm just venting.