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Do you have close friends?

How many long-standing (10+ yr.) friendships (with people you have never had any sexual attraction to, and are not family members) do you have?

Not dormant or internet friendships; real-world friends that you have stayed in touch with for over ten years, and still see in person occasionally.

skado 9 Jan 5
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20 comments

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1
  1. LOL childhood friend. he is the opposite of me. oil and vinegar that blend and help each other.
1

None, but I'm getting close. We became friends sometime around 2010 and we just hung out on New Year's Eve.

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Over a dozen. The older I get, the more there are.

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I'm extremely lucky to have so many long term close friends. I have 3 very close friends in my town that I've known for over 15 years. My best friend and I met 25 years ago. I have a lot of 10+ year close friends I used to work with in other states who keep in touch via the internet, but we try to get together once a year at our work conference or we go on vacations together. None are atheists, though. But we're all very respectful of one another's views.

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Do those who have passed away count?
I've lost about 4 of those along the way and 2 of those were this year. I have about 9 of those people still left.

Donna Level 6 Jan 7, 2018
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Still in contact with some buddies from my youth in Puerto Rico... many are gone. Being in the Military it is hard to keep up, I got a buddy here in DC area that we meet in Germany... he came to visit when I was in Las Vegas, we linked up and communicate here. We both retired from military, We will link up soon before I leave toward Vegas. Because I move around have a number of friends from my days in Jacksonville. When I go down there I will meet them there. Same with south florida and central florida. There is a buddy we went to private catholic school from 1st grade to 6th grade. We found each other in FB. He is a speed freak. We are now talking and not seen each other for about close to 50 years but we talk on the phone. Nothing changed between us... except we no longer play to be napoleon solo and illya kuryakin anymore. Some ex flames we communicate but they are married so nothing extensive to inform there for the obvious. There is "Lady L" if in the area we go dancing, movies, etc... but our time is long passed... all that is left is the friendship. There are guys from my clubs days in DC. but been away from DC they still going to the same clubs that did not closed. Is a Salsa thing.

1

I have friends that I've known for decades... are they close? Well, that's a tough one. Are online friends that close? I don't know.

0

3 in my life, 2 died

Thank you for sharing, btroje.

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I can only think of one that fits all the criteria. T^he way everyone moves around these days, changes phone numbers, emails and addresses so often, it is hard to keep in touch with peopel long term. Then there is the travel issues to actually see them in person.

I keep in touch with some friends, even if we never see each other any more.

1

My best friend is my dog,no one can approach the love and companionship

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Three. One I've known 15 years in the town I live in, one 42 years from Peterborough, Ont. who I met at the Nassau, Bahamas, airport, and one on the island off Vancouver, BC, from Ft. Lauderdale High School, '71, who married my deceased husband's best friend in Ontario, who I've known for 48 years. I don't let many people in, but when I do, it's because they are special and we click. Thats why it's so hard to find a companion.

I know what you mean.

3

Online is very real, though I doubt you're denying that. I've had more online friends for like 7+ years than irl for 10+. And I've only basically lived a little over a decade (my first 8 years mostly don't count) so 10+ is a bit unfair xD........................................................................but my first best friend I made at 8, and have kept in contact with him mostly since (I'm almost 25 now), though there was a dormant period of probably five years or so. Second best friend has been since I was 13, so a little over 10. I've been friends with my other best friend for...4 years now, but we've been through some extremely turbulent times and abusive dating early on, and we're still super close. Made us closer, it seems, even if I know the relationship probably has more negative impact than positive on me a lot of the time, just because of old patterns/habits and both of our individual struggles in life right now. We love each other too much to go without each other for very long, though...........................................................................................
I'll just mention online relationships anyways - they're mainly dormant now, but I've known four people since I was 13 (from forum rp sites when my female best friend introduced me to them). I've talked to them out of the blue now and again and the conversation was still comfortable. Facebook friends with all of them, as well. A couple others that I'm super close to have been 5 years (though probably only about 2 of, on average, talking every other day) and 2 or 3 years.

2

Zero. I've moved alot and left my work at work. I don't like wasting time "hanging out" with "friends." What I don't know is if I am actually an egomaniac with an inferiority complex!! In my free time-off I prefer being alone or with animals. ??(Is something wrong with me?)??

Only that you might be an egomaniac with an inferiority complex lol. Animals are better than people so.

2

Honestly this question isn't fair to someone like me. I've moved over 30 times. My family and friends are highly dispersed.

Sticking to the question - in person known for 10+ years, I still have Aaron, Chris, Daniel, Josh, Leah, Matt, Stefani, Ross, Tony and Zach. RIP Sam early morning 1/5/18 from a perforated bowel due to a colonoscopy that was botched just over 10 years ago due to Gardner's Syndrome.

To be honest, my close extended family (including aunts/uncles and cousins) lives all over the US. Several have lived elsewhere and/or are married to someone from elsewhere in the world. Many of my friends from my teens to mid-20s live all over the US and a few live elsewhere.

Via a combination of calls, emails, Facebook, letters, Skype and texts, I'm weekly to monthly in contact with numerous relatives and long term friends. I also see many of them in person every year to several years on holidays or whenever we happen to be near 1 another.

I've been on Facebook since the beginning. I only have 193 contacts - mostly family, friends, and former classmates, coworkers, teachers and other academic/professional contacts. In any given month I have at least brief contact with about 1/4 of them.

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None at the moment. Now then, I have 10 that I have known for 20, but they are on my facebook. I know that doesn't count. We don't talk or hangout anymore.

MoniB Level 6 Jan 6, 2018
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One that I was never sexually involved with. A girl I met in 1972 on holidays, our families holidayed in the same town each year. The last time was in 1976. Then in 1983 we found ourselves working side by side in bank office. We have stayed in touch ever since we have both since married, divorced and so forth, she is currently happily married, our kids get on great, my son and I last saw her and her husband about 10 days ago. I also have an ex from over 18 years ago that I still speak to daily and we catch up when she visits her son.

2

I'm down to 1 now, too. I guess that's just how it goes as we age? Had a heaping bunch growing up but we all went off to (try to) raise families, and that killed nearly all but the superficial friendships, it seems.

3

Only 1, but that's also the number of friends I have so not sure if it counts.

1

Excellent question. Just one. I've moved too much. Changed my world view too many times. Wellllll... maybe one more, but he's a born-againer. We email each other every couple years. If I had posted this question, I would have said "Five years". In that case, it'd be 4.

Good point on the worldview angle. Mine has definitely changed over the years!

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