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LINK Attachment vs. Love: Understanding the Difference

I found this very insightful.

bleurowz 8 July 15
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6 comments

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I have read all of the responses and find that it is subjective. Even the opinions. But I like that we can try to solve a topic so many books and articles have been written by great minds. All I know for certain is that love made me act a fool.

Mokvon Level 8 July 21, 2018
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I don't mean to be a dick...but I found it simplistic and misleading. As if love is infallible. Anything bad and it's attachment. That's not how love works. Hindsight is 20/20. Just because love doesn't always work out, doesn't mean it's anything less than it was.

Edit: I swear, one of the worst things people can do is look back on failed love and hold it against themselves or others like it wasn't genuine, and then re-define love as something that's practically unobtainable. Don't shame what you felt, take a hard look into the mirror and figure out why you felt it to begin with. Learn, grow, be better, move on. Don't try to shape the world around you to make yourself feel better. That's suicide. You will die lonely.

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Love is very confusing, because it's a blanket term for all kinds of behaviors: sharing, compassion, sexual desire, protecting, nourishing, and even veneration.

There are literally millions of pundits all claiming to know what "true" love is, as opposed to some flawed kind the rest of us luckless mortals know. I imagine this continues to sell books. We are, as creatures, caught on the hook of knowledge of our own existence, our external experiences live side by side with our internal state.

So it is not surprising that when our internal expectations, and the outside experience clash, that we feel discomfort, or even pain. Or to put it more bluntly: just because you love someone that does not love you in equal measure, is no reason to discount one's own feelings as mere "attachment." It is not wrong, nor toxic, when you love someone, to wish to be loved in return. Rather, it is normal, and there are literally millions of poems and songs devoted to this very commonplace occurrence.

And not to sound cynical, but-well, I for one, am not a saint. I do not love everyone equally, nor unconditionally. I respond enthusiastically to affection, and I am certainly not going to apologize for this.

Deveno Level 7 July 15, 2018

Yeah, you're right. The topic of love is an impending shitstorm because no one is on the same page as to what it means from the get go.

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I think more to give Unattached love. That way you give your love freely. Alot women don't understand this concept

Lol. A lot of humans don't understand that concept.

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The author of this article strikes me as a person that did not think clearly in the past and is now projecting those faults on others.

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I have learned the hard way, it is hard to hold love or attachment for a narcissist.

nomyth Level 3 July 15, 2018
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