I don't answer the door if I'm not expecting someone. My people know to call or text me if they're coming over, so unless I've ordered a pizza, random doorbell rings go unacknowledged.

I'll talk till they drop

I break out my Bible and welcome them in. It largely goes as you describe. They NEVER return.

I tell them that I am offended they think I haven't thought about these things just as hard as they have. I am a scientific skeptic, I tell them, and I can't find a shred of evidence for their beliefs. When they start to talk about the bible (inevitably they do), I just laugh and tell them to go read the ancient Babylonian mythology, from which the bible was rather poorly plagerized. ....sometimes I'm nicer than that. But it gets OLD, to have someone knock on my door and tell me they know something I don't.

I have never had it happen in California. When I was in the Navy stationed in Bremerton Washington we had a couple stop by. This was a party house where several young squids lived. We had a keggarator and metal was always on the stereo. We would just invite them in for a beer. I think one of my roommates almost convinced a Mormon kid to enlist!

I tell them that I am appalled by their beliefs,-especially Jehovahs witnesses- I tell them their reluctance to give a sick or injured child a blood transfusion is despicable.Then I say goodbye and close the door.

Here's a couple signs that also work:

"If you can read this, you are in range" Or this one..............
"The residents of this house charge $50/minute to listen to Salesmen, Religious people, or politicians. By ringing this bell you agree to those terms"

Answer the door naked... works every time.

I deal with them the way I deal with my spam calls...don't answer..

I put a sign on my front door when my children were small. It said, "Positively No Traveling Salesmen, Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons or any other persons who ring this doorbell after lunch till at least 4:00 pm. After that, I will discuss most anything with you if you will feed the baby while I make dinner and fold the diapers. PS I don't make open door contributions. I make contributions by check to deserving organizations." That took care of my problem.

I have posted a no soliciting sign and that has helped a bit. I don't engage at all. I don't think I need to be polite given that they are encroaching upon my time and space. I usually use a curt "Not interested" and start to shut the door. My grandfather liked to have more fun with them. With a twinkle in his eye, he would say, "Lady, I sold my soul to the devil during the War for a bottle of whisky. You wouldn't want me to renege on a deal would you?"

I used to live in Utah and one EARLY Saturday morning, my husband answers the door to some LDS folks. They told him they were the for a “fast offering” (Money saved by fasting from the day before, as I understand it). My husband, completely oblivious, though they meant, “fast offering” like give them whatever you had on hand, STAT! He apologized and told them he didn’t have any cash on him and sent them on their way. I was crying when he told me about it after. Hysterical.

The following Saturday, they came again, well before 9am. This time, I answered the door. I explained that we were not LDS, and they could take our house off their list. The older man (he was with two younger guys) explained that the offerings were used to support everyone in the community, not just LDS members (which is unlikely as LDS friends who received help were made to step up their attendance to get assistance). I told him we weren’t interested, and to please take us off their route.

Finally, the third Saturday, they again woke us early, and I’d had it. I told them that this was three times now we’d turned them away (ha! Like Peter, we denied them three times) and enough was enough. I closed the door, called the stake house number and spoke with our ward (neighborhood) bishop. That finally accomplished it and I got back my Saturday mornings. I was probably too nice the first time, but I don’t like being nasty to people, if I can avoid it.

And once...the CATHOLICS came to my door. I was raised Catholic, and that was a Twilight Zone moment for me.

Generally, “I’m not interested, but thank you for stopping by and have a nice day” is my go-to for the most frequent flier visitors, the JWs.

I love it, when I have the time. They are usually kid and good people. When I ask them pointed questions, refer them to their own bible they get agitated because their faith is so very fragile. I always invite them back, but they never come back. I feel sorry for them.

I have only ever had young LDS missionaries knock on my door. As a former member (I left the church as a teenager) they are usually trying to track me down to invite me back to church. A few firm but polite, "no thank you's" usually does the trick. These kids are so very young! I feel quite sorry for them.

If the believer does not leave after I explain my position, I will tell him I am a practicing nudist and start to take off my clothes. So far I have not had to do this; other friends say this is a successful tactic.

I talk to them for as long as they want. I consider it a civic duty. I reckon they are working on the clock, rather than piece work. So if they spend half an hour with me, they have less time to bother my neighbors. Also, it helps them too because they save on shoe leather.

If I have time, am not averse to having folks in for a chat, sharing tea/cocoa... Otherwise my standard response is that "My sis and I believe in something else". I haven't had occasion to state "what" that something else is... Coupe deville, flying spag. monstah, what have you... knockers have universally signed off with "have a nice day" or such.

Tell them you've been excommunicated from "the church".

Many of the door-knockers won't be allowed to talk to you...

[Additional win, they may report back to the mothership and the # of incidents will decrease]

I thank them for their dedication to their beliefs and tell them I respect them for the effort they are putting forth and ask them to respect me for my beliefs as well. I have often felt that the non religious could get better results with kindness. They already think we are stupid for our lack of belief, do we need to be thought of as a$$%^&es as well because we attack them? I try to stay calm and explain my opinion. I hope I plant a seed of doubt.

I would hand them a copy of The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and a towel, and wish them good day and good luck

I am very civil to them at the beginning and engage them in conversation opposing religion, if they get to sassy I insist they leave. After a couple of visits the word spreads that its a waste of time to come knocking on my door. I am very proud that I had a great deal to do with a young married couple leaving the j-dubs and becoming atheists.

Have you heard the good news? There is no God and we are the masters of our own destiny

I invent a religion and tell them all about it. Usually they cannot wait to leave.

In my underwear.

I ignore them. I only answer my door if I have invited someone over.