I learned a few years ago that i live life with bpd( borderline personality disorder). i don't medicate at the moment. the doc thinks i should do lithium. i just don't know how i feel about that. i don't want to be a different person. i do yoga and meditate and try to just know more about myself and life. just kinda hoping i can find a friend who knows what im going through a bit
I have a friend with BPD but havent seen her in years we used to both volunteer at a mental health organisation - She would take time off when she needed it and had a group of friends as well as the 'org'. as 'spotters' watching for when she was on the way down or too up. She was cute enough to not argue with their assessments and took things easy at those times if someone told her she was on the way up or down she knew what she needed to do for herself and someone had taught her that but I don't know what it was-
Do some research on BPD. You will find it is a stigmatization and pathologizing of sensitive and depressed women, who have often experienced a trauma. By all means find a psychologist who wants to work with you on emotional control, and do CBT with you, but do not take lithium and find another phychiatrist for a 2nd opinion. It’s a hotly debated “condition” within both the feminist and mental health professional community. Get a 3rd opinion. Likely you are just a normal woman, who is very sensitive and finds herself in dramatic situations because you are depressed and traumatized. Hold on on labeling yourself. You are all good, promise!
No. It's a real disorder. When your emotions overwhelm you like they do with BPD, you realise something is wrong on a visceral, physical level. Like how, when you're having a heart attack, you know something is very wrong.
@memorylikeasieve Whether or not it’s a real disorder is hotly debated. We disagree.
@memorylikeasieve In fact, it is often used to diagnose when women show a diversity of symptoms (hyper vigilance, panic, high sensitivity, anxiety, depression and self harm) It’s the go to label when the patient doesn’t seem to respond to previous medications or therapies. These patients are often treated badly by the medical community as attention seeking. There is no way that these patients should be labeled as having a personality disorder that is categorized under the same umbrella as NPD, Anti-social PD or psychopathy. It is very stigmatizing and makes people feel untreatable. All in all it’s dubious and highly misogynistic diagnosis. You may wish to embrace it as a diagnosis- I won’t. I have been told by psychiatrists that I have anxiety, bi-polar, adhd, ocd, PTSD depression and BPD. Which is it??? Each doctor a different diagnosis. Psychiatrists let people down - it’s trial and error with drugs and they totally talk shit. BPD particularly hones in and pathologizes female behavior, and psychiatry is very male dominated.
It is in the DSMIV and the DSMV. Who thinks they can decide what is or isn’t a disorder if not them?
Your information is about 20 years old. It did not USED to have a real definition nor be any single set of symptoms. Now it is.
@LionMousePudding And I don’t think it should be. It pathologizes female behavior. Who gets to say what’s in the DSMIV? Mainly men. Like men get to write policies on female reproduction. My information is not 20 years old whatsoever. [researchgate.net]
@AmyLynn no, I did not say BPD behaviors are female
behaviors. That is what the DSM is doing, and that is what I object to.
Of course the symptoms are real. There is a high rate for suicide attempts for anyone that has depression, panics, generalized anxiety, cutting, hyper vigilance and high sensitivity as a cluster. I am suggesting these are co morbidites like: PTSD plus high sensitivity.
BPD is like the classification when the doctor is unsure what to do. [thefword.org.uk]
@AmyLynn How do you feel about it being listed as a “personality disorder” and presented alongside anti-social personality and narcissistic personality disorder. I think it’s a terrible way to classify these symptoms. “Personality Disorder” implies it is incurable/very difficult to treat, and it’s not the case. DBT is an excellent tool and medication can help with symptoms. I think the terminology is stigmatizing, it’s place in the DMV is offensive, it shouldn’t be seen as a personality disorder and be alongside some very dark and troubling disorders. I am not negating the symptoms- I have a batch of them myself - but I find it very misogynistic and have no wish to be regarded as having a defective personality.
@AmyLynn Well emotional disregulation disorder sounds a much better description and is far more appropriate. Classing it a PD is awful and just conjures up Fatal Attraction stereotyping, which I feel is terribly attacking on women and the sufferer. I definitely have Emotional Disregulation, I can certainly identify with that far more.
Do not take lithium. That is kind of last resort even for those who need it. Nasty stuff.
Anyway any doctor that thinks there is medication for bpd is clueless. Bpd is a personality disorder. You cannot medicate away a personality disorder.
Other psychiatric conditions do often co-occur with bpd; they are "co-morbid." Depression and anxiety are par for the course, but need to be treated as depression anxiety.
There is only one way to help bpd. To explain, I have to explain what bpd actually is, in a nutshell. These are some of the ways good doctors have explained it:
"Bpd sufferers feel three times the pain as others"
"It is like starting out with third degree burns on your skin, only emotionally"
Basically, life HURTS. This is why 7/10 of bpd sufferers have attempted suicide (1/10 succeeds). You can measure this. It is not made up.
You know someone with bpd. Ever met a drama queen? She acted like every little thing was a catastrophe, just to get attention, right? No, not to get attention. Because it HURT. She was out of control, overreacting. No, she wasn't. She was more in control than you would have been if your body/mind gave you the same pain. It's just that it makes no sense to you because you don't know that she has so much pain.
So, how does one treat bpd? You can't medicate the pain away. You can't therapy it away. There will always be more emotional pain for a bpd than non, in the same situation.
All you can do is learn how to 1. Minimize the pain by not doing things to make it worse, and 2. Learn how not to show the pain. You still feel it, but you shield others from it.
Dialectical Behavioural Therapy is really the only thing that will help. And it is learn, learn, learn. This isn't a therapist's couch, it is a school. Literally. The true course of therapy for bpd, pioneered by Martha Linehann at the turn of the century, is a one year, five day a week, five hour a day, school, with no day off even for Christmas.
Medicate the comorbid psychiatric issues. But learn to create a normal life despite the pain, making neither your life nor that of the people in your life, worse than they have to be. That sounds awful, but I will tell you if your doctor diagnosed you correctly, it will be far better than now.
I think I changed the subject of my "you" a few times there, sorry. It is after 5 AM!
I have scizoaffective disorder, it's not the same but I do understand where you are coming from.
I've been diagnosed with BPD. I have never taken lithium for it, but my experience with just about anything is kinda unique. As a narcoleptic, lithium would be a very bad idea for me.
I take sertraline for it, now, after a running a long gauntlet of psych meds. But that's the thing--brains are so individual that what makes one person feel like a zombie make another feel like a normal, functional person. That's the reason why there are so many different psych meds. Just trying one and saying 'oh, they all do this negative thing to me' is kind of disingenuous. It's a tough row to hoe, but coming out the other end with the proper meds is worth it.
Also, DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy) does wonders for BPD and the emotion storms we so often have. It teaches you to recognise when you're in what they call 'emotion mind,' and how to mentally step back from it, calm your thoughts, and own the emotions so you can move forward. It's pretty much been, to use a religious phrase, a godsend for me.
I have a friend who has it pretty bad. Not sure what she is on. I know she struggles pretty bad with it. I’m not sure what all it entails. I have major depressive disorder with OCD, panic disorder, and severe anxiety. I do know my friend with BPD has to take heavy sedatives for her manic periods when she can’t sleep. Lithium is a pretty heavy drug. I’d see if your psych can start you out with lower drugs before going to that extreme.
My son is on this scale.....bpd/bipolar. He sometime goes off his meds as he says they makes him feel like a zombie. He is on a new regime of some sort, and seems better at the moment but drinks too much in binges. He has a good job as an IT Technical Manager at the moment but in the past has lost several when off his meds. I don’t think he was ever put on Lithium, but in the UK treatment may be different. I wish you the best in finding someone to share this with. My son finds it hard to sustain long term relationships unfortunately, but at the moment does have a girlfriend.
There is no correlation nor connection between bpd and bipolar. You must have one of the abbreviations wrong?
@LionMousePudding No the psychiatrist says he was at first wrongly diagnosed as bipolar when he was in his twenties but she thinks he more likely has borderline personality disorder. However she does say that there are so many crossovers with several illnesses that it is hard to pin it down exactly and he is somewhere on the spectrum (her words). He also says it is not uncommon for a lot of the depressive illnesses to be wrongly labelled on the first diagnosis and sometimes it takes years to get the proper diagnosis. He is now 42 and this newer psychiatrist ( a younger female) seems to be on the right track at last, and whatever meds he is on now seem to be working.
Hmmm... Lithium is usually for bipolar disorder not borderline personality disorder. They have very similar symptoms but they are different, primarily different causes and triggers. I've been around two people with borderline and they did not take lithium. They ended up on several different medications before they settled on something that worked.
I'm not a health care provider but I would suggest strongly researching the treatment standards for borderline and think about your personal experience. It is not the same for all who are diagnosed with BPD.