What say you about conflict v. Artificial Harmony? Would you prefer to get issues out in the open, even if it may end in a bad place, or would you prefer a state of Artificial Harmony?
I grew up with "artifical harmony" We just didn't talk about stuff. It was horrid, and it took years of therapy for me to even begin to undo the damage. But "conflict vs" implies that there is no middle ground. If by "conflict" you simply mean people can say what they think aind disagree, then I'm totally with that. But you can also respectfully discuss things without getting to the point of conflict, at least some of the time.
To me, this is a lot like everything else we do: it takes practice to do it right. So, if we ignore the little stuff then we're not prepared for the big stuff. I want to have meaningful discussions and agreements about whats for dinner, and which show should we see. Then we are more ready when its time to pick a vacation spot.
@Dick_Martin or talk about how much money to give to which charities or discuss the balance of responsibilities.,,,
Unfortunately I tend to artificial harmony because I don't like conflict. I know it is better in the long run to get an issue out in the open. But fear of conflict tries to get in the way. This is not good for relationships and I think it is my greatest downfall in that area.
Depends on the other person. A casual acquaintance or distance relative probably rate artificial harmony, but people with whom you must cohabit or learn to trust might rate more honesty. Or not. Depending on how touchy they are.
we do live in artificially huge numbers close together so should live and let live like ants.
Some things are better left unsaid. I don't like the term "artificial" harmony. If something really bothers you then get it out in the open but why provoke unnecessarily. Live and let live. Know what is important and let the other sh*t slide
I can’t say it any better than @MikeInBatonRouge did.
Thnx
With people I expect to have no continued relationship, artificial harmony. Why sweat It?
With people in my life, always opt for honesty. Respectful assertiveness is generally going to prevent the buildup of resentments.
mic drop