If there is no committment and no sexual activity I think dating multiple people is ok if all is divulged. Once sexual relationship is in the picture it is not a healthy situation mentally and physically trust me.

I would NEVER date anyone that is seeing someone else at the same time. When I date, I expect it to be exclusive. Just the possibility of disease transfer is enough, but it goes way beyond that. I don't ever want to be someone's number 2. If I'm not number one and only, I'm out. Your arrogance is ridiculous. When I date, I want your full attention, or no attention at all. Anyone that would agree to that situation must be desperate. What kind of relationship is that!

Depends of what you mean by dating. If you're just casually dating with no SO, then I don't see any problem. If you're serious about someone, if you don't tell them you're seeing others that cheating.

How do you feel about the people you date also having multiple dates?

If you are genuinely open and honest and OK about shared space as are your partners, then I see no problem with it.

By open and honest, I don't include comparing their sexual prowess or other attribute, I mean only the fact that you are seeing others. My response to such enquiries would be that "They are different to you" Not better or worse, just different.

Eh, the only thing that really freaks me out about it is the idea of a sexual partner having other sexual partners besides me. And I'm not put off by the social/emotional/psychological aspects, either--just the physical, sexual health aspect. If there's no sex involved, then I would probably be alright with it.

There's only so many days in a month, and people are busy these days, so I can totally see wanting to casually date several people at the same time as a means of saving time. You can winnow away the mismatches simultaneously instead of taking much longer to do it sequentially. Of course, my attitude toward dating is that 9/10 of the people you date are probably not going to work out--so don't get worked up over it, and just move on to the next one. No big deal.

This applies to the initial getting-to-know-you, seeing-if-we're-compatible kind of dating. Not an ongoing, holding pattern kind of thing.

I am polyamorous, so I date or have relationships with more than one person at times. I disclose this ahead of time so it isn't ever an issue. I never feel, or would want them to feel like they are competing.

When I was dating, I sometimes dated several women at the same time, with the idea that the comparison would enable me to make better choices. That was my sole motive.

Are you saying you want to do date multiple women at once so you feel like they are competing for you with some drama? Or did I misread the whole thing?

I am lucky that there is a strong polyamory community here by me. I am proudly nonmonogamous (though I have a committed primary) and divulge that fact early when meeting people interested in relationships with me.

I love my autonomy as well as my fan club and cannot see being happily monogamous again.

There have been times when I was seeing more than one person. But that was in the preliminary stages of getting-to-know-you. No commitments.

Once I enter into an intimate connection with one, the rest get shut down , until I see if that one person has long term potential.

Depends a lot in your age. At 65 I "date" the brains out of several women. They know about each other. They have their own homes and interests.
They don't want another man around the house but they still like getting laid without all the crap attached.
Reading all these comments by women saying there's no way they would put up with that I say, religion has taught you well.

I'd appreciate the disclosure but it's one at a time for me the 'competitive' thing would be a bit weird too but maybe that's just 'old lion syndrome'

I think like most things, relationships/dating falls on a spectrum. Seldom am I be willing to commit to exploring a relationship with only one person at a time after one or two dates. This, of course, will make things more complicated when I need to suddenly break things off with one person because I want to commit fully to another.

Sleeping with more than one person at a time is even more complicated.

I guess, as is typical, it's complicated and there is no one size fits all answer.

In an actual face-to-face date no. It would be hard (knowing me I would get each one confused with the other and make lots of faux pas).

Online sure. After all it is about choices and commonalities and having multiple choices ups the ante for success.

Somehow I feel humans are like the animals especially the birds that build fancy nests or do dances or puff themselves up to get the mate. We are not really different.

Oh, I thought you meant 4 or 5 women on the same date.

I would say that as long as there's transparency, it's perfectly reasonable to date multiple people. I once had someone tell me they were dating someone else too, and I broke off the relationship as a result. I don't think I would, these days.

Genuine polyamory has its appeals for me, these days. I can easily imagine myself in a relationship of 3 or 4 people, each of us emotionally committed to the others. It's just a shame that so many people use the term for conventional two person relationship, but with casual sexual partners (no emotional connection) thrown into the mix.

I am not exactly dating, but I do spend time with a number of ladies, I prefer female company. There are no secrets, many of them have met each other, one drops in for coffee while another is staying a few days. Most are looking for a partner, a couple have given up, all know I am open to meet a potential partner, just not looking that hard. I avoid drama, none of these ladies are emotionally invested in me nor i in them. I am with ShellBell the drama filled game is a no no in my books.

I'm not polyamorus.

I know many people who date multiple people at a time. I can't do it. It feels disingenuous to me.

Just hearing "They compete for me." makes you sound kinda like a jerk. just sayin'.

I think dating through sites just has a slightly different ruleset to dating in "real life" with people you meet at a bar or work. We all get a lot of choices but we know almost nothing about them so a date is essential to really understand if you want to do anything, let alone go serious. That means you probably have to say "pass" on a lot more people and move to another. That said, I already feel awkward chatting up a girl on a dating site if I am also chatting to another and I'd be totally open about that and expect others to be doing the same ... if I went on a date and we hit it off then I would absolutely tell any other girl that I was already seeing someone. It's not right to be secretly dating different people.

Just have to be honest with the partners, you’ll lose some but better than lying about the situation.

My thing is that while I'm not bothered about such things at all, it has to be equal. As long as I can have multiple partners too I wouldn't care either way. The problem is I don't have a lot of time. The last time I was in an open relationship he went and fucked a ton of girls and I never had the time or opportunity to get a second so there isn't much point it for me. I don't think I would be any more or less attracted to a guy with other girlfriends, though I suppose the time he did spend with me would mean more if he could be with all these other girls, but he's choosing me? Oh and these people need to be clean. Let's see the paperwork before each new addition.

You're ideas, thoughts, and feelings about this change as you get older. I've tried dating two at the same time. It is WAY too complicated ! I guess it's okay until you get intimate. My best advice for you is one at a time.Although, if it's not working out, MOVE ON !!!! Good luck

Currently, I will only be in open/poly relationships, so of course, depending on time constraints and compatibility. Ethical non-monogamy is the only way for me. I wouldn't completely rule out being exclusive with someone or a group, but there would need to be compelling reasons, and a lot of discussion.