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Date a theist?

Could you date a devout religious person? At this point in my life I think it would be a problem.

Donster 4 Feb 14
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20 comments

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0

It would be a big problem for me, I don’t think I could do it.

0

It would depend on whether or not they are willing to accept my lack of faith.

2

Depends on how old you are and what the theist looks like. You asked “date” and not marry. Could be fun for a while, but destined not to last.

2

Absolutely not. I'll be honest, I view faith and religion contemptuously.

1

No. I could be friends with a thiest if we don't need to discuss it but not someone I'm dating

1

Nope. Couldn’t and wouldn’t.

1

No, wouldn't work for me, and I wouldn't work for her.

2

Depends on the religion in question. I have a friend that worships the Greek gods and it's never bothered me at all. A devout Christian? Heavens no.

1

I really couldn't, it would be far too difficult to date someone with devout belief. Even if they were smart enough to keep it to themselves, the that fact that those beliefs are lying beneath the surface ready to interfere at any time is just a mine field I'd rather avoid all together.

I can accept other people for their beliefs and just let them be, but relationships are an entirely different beast. Ideological difference in a relationship, if they are too different, can spell a lot of trouble. Issues such as marriage, kids and all the ceremonies that go with them, familial ties are things religion needlessly complicates and screws up.

1

No!!! It’s a dealbreaker.

1

For me it was the only deal breaker in our marriage . I would even have night mares on a rare occasion. He passed eight years ago and we never had a changed of heart. But then again what do I know what was hidden deep inside. Still single.....

1

One of the criteria I felt was important was a similar belief system,
Up to mid high school I was a practisng Catholic, then a doubting Catholic and eventually I passed through the varionu stages into confirmed atheism.
As my thinking matured girls I would have dated in the past became undisireable. Seldom did I linger long in any relationship with someone who was not an openminded freethinker despite the availability and likilhood of sex.
In my mind any person who needed a sky fairy to anchor their thinking just became undesireable.Eventually I met someone who had been through similar experiences, I was 30 when we married, fifty years ago, and we sucessfully raised six children.
So I simply cannot imagine intentiolally proceeding past the introductory stages of dating with someone more religious than I had been
I am afraid that I consider such people just dumb.

2

Devout? No. Casual? Maybe.

My late wife was unperturbed by my deconversion on her watch, far as I can tell the divergence in our religious views did not harm our relationship at all. The trick, I think, is the relationship has to be based on mutual respect and common interests that aren't tangled up in religious beliefs. In her case, she had been ill for so long that she had drifted away from church herself by the time I met her. It's hard to maintain those kinds of connections when your unpredictable symptoms effectively make you unreliable for keeping appointments / commitments. Also, she had come to see that the "love" of her fellow Christians was highly conditional / unreliable.

2

Frankly I don't think I have? Oh yes - just 1 - a family member set me up with him.

No would not do that again.

1

Depends. If they can accept my non-belief. I've dated women who were actually upset by my godlessness as somehow an attack on their own beliefs. If they're not fanatical about it and are basically decent people, it's not a problem. This is my first foray into seeking out like-minded secular oriented partners. I am pleased the amount of female representation here. At local freethought venues (CFI - Los Angeles), they were heavily weighted towards men, and very few younger women in all my years of association.

1

No.

Nena Level 6 Feb 14, 2018
1

Under no circumstances.

4

There's no way. I have tried, and you cannot love someone when three or four times each day you just look at them and think, 'How the fuck do you even function?" She would frequently make comments out of nowhere like, "God is amazing." Or walking around singing to herself, "I love you, Jesus." I mean this was a normal woman of average intelligence in most circumstances, a terrific mother to her son, and a sweetheart, but when any mention was made of religion, god, jesus, or church she became a mindless broken record.
It didn't last long, but it was a nightmare.

JimG Level 8 Feb 14, 2018

It's weird how that can happen!

I don’t even think most religious people are aware of what’s in their own bibles, which is sad.

1

I will still do it all the time if need to.

3

I work with 'em and that's as far as I can go.

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