I actively looked for men that did not remind me of my father. My hubby is almost his opposite. However, a few years after being with my hubby-- he had this revelation that me and his mother have a lot in common. lol
No. I already have to much in common with my parents. It’s why I don’t date much I think.
My mother and father are opposites in many regards and both have strengths and weaknesses I've inherited. Personality wise I'm more like my mother and the people I'm attracted to are more like my father. It seems emotionally and evolutionarily prudent for people to operate in this way when they can identify the strengths, weaknesses and differences among their parents.
On the other hand, if both parents are similar, it becomes harder to identify strengths and weaknesses because the contrast isn't as great. Then considering the outcomes of situations as a child does, it's easier to identify negative outcomes as they make a larger impression than all the times things just went right. So, I think people whose parents are similar to each other yield offspring looking for something else, while being closer in personality to both their parents. Which is great from an evolutionary perspective, but I think more random from an emotional perspective.
@silvereyes but what about your mother? I'm talking personality traits, not weird Freudian nonsense. If your parents are opposites and you are looking for something different than your father, it only makes sense that you've dated people or are potentially married to someone that has overlap with your mother in many ways.
@silvereyes Interesting. The primary trait of my father is that he's a jerk. I definitely avoid that, so people I'm attracted to come off very different than my father, but I definitely look for that overlap in other traits. I want a penny pincher who will yell at the kids and call me a retarded when I need it. I wouldn't call it striking similarities, but the things he has helped me learn would enrich my life. These are his strengths that really complement the biggest weaknesses I got from Mom.
I do NOT want to date someone like my mother. Not personality wise or physically wise.
Physically wise is self explanatory.
I love my mother and she's a good person willing to sacrifice and do stuff for her family, but shit I can't take some of her personality traits. She's worrisome, a nag, controlling and wants everyone to do as she says when she says, has no patience, complains about everything, makes a mountain out of a molehill, and flies off the handle sometimes. A relationship with that wouldn't last long for me. I might end up in jail lol
Lol heck no!!’ The last person I’d want to think about is my dad when I’m supposed to be with a love interest.
I do not think I will end up with someone exactly like my mother, but some of her non-physical traits are quite desirable, such as caring, strong work ethic, etc. Nobody I have dated so far reminds me of my mother though.