Although I'm late to your post, welcome, @Hazydays! I hope some of these suggestions have been helpful, particularly @VictoriaNotes recommendation, which I'm going to check out as well. It's been quite some time since I lost my husband, but I remember well the problems in finding support. Elizabeth Kubler Ross was popular at the time and I thought if one more person tried to diagnose me according to her five stages of grief, I would have slapped them. It's going to be a long process and if you ever feel you need to talk, feel free to message me, okay?

I have suffered through just about every kind of loss exept death of a spouse. Sorry for your loss and i hope you recover well. I lost my closest cousin to ALS just over a year ago. He lived in Lantana Fl, I spent a lot of time there as a caregiver to provide some relief for his spouse who needed help dealing with the dreadful disease. I am happy to tell you that she recovered well and is in fact dating again. I live just south of Orlando and would be glad to provide support. I will PM you with contact info.

Funny, I just posted something that happened at My grief group that is given by the church because I couldn't find any others in my area. ( I recently lost my mom ) I just figure I would check it out anyway. I just bite my lip through all the ' GOD ' talk. If you can ignore that part it's pretty helpful and interesting to watch the whole thing play out. Gives me something to do and I really just wanted to hear their stories. Sometimes when something comes up that you don't want to do, you should try it anyway ( ? )

I can sympathize. I never looked for any groups though. After the painful haze dissipated somewhat I found my way out of grief.

Have had experience falling for a widower, did not end well as she walled up and shut me out of her life. Did not want to press matters and simply respected her wishes. Maybe her being almost 20 years older did not help.

Anyways, wish you and all other widowers good luck. ^_^

Thanks everyone for responding. For me it’s been 9 months. I joined every online support group there was in the beginning,including GBB, but found after a while I couldn’t take the sheer volume of heartbreaking stories that I was reading and had to leave them all for my mental sanity. I found I didn’t need them as an outlet to vent, I didn’t need the support of ‘me too’, and my empathic nature just couldn’t carry the magnitude of heartache out there any longer. It was reassuring in the beginning to know I wasn’t alone. I suppose in the early days I was seeking an answer, a magic solution to take the pain away...heads up, there isn’t one I quickly changed my support arena to positive psychology groups and I’ve been doing ok. Feel in a better place ‘emotionally’ than most widows on my timeline of loss, but I know my husband would want nothing less than for me to be happy, successful and productive going forward. So, I now live my life for him with an open mind and an open heart and a fire in my belly to make a difference in the world. One person at a time. Realizing the importance of everyday as tomorrow is never promised.
Sorry I didn’t respond to each person individually but I’m still learning the site as I only joined this afternoon. Thanks for listening.

I'm sorry for your loss. At one point in my life I was a widower. The bottom line is that this grief and experience is different with every individual. Therefore, take as much time as you have to in order to cope and adjust. Some people also do not understand that it is sometimes necessary to talk about the deceased person even if it seems extreme to others.
I once knew a lady who lost her husband and she was in therapy over his passing. She told me the therapist once said she should shake her fist at him in spite and declare "if you had taken better care of yourself you might still be alive today." I told her that didn't set right with me. She said it didn't set right with her either and that was her last visit. "Good for you," I said. The therapist wanted her to get better but you cannot do this by berating the departed.

First of all... Welcome to our little place and may you find friendship, fun, joy, happiness and more among equals in our little home. I wish you could talk to my sister that is on month 4 of her loss. She is not doing well... it was husband nr three... it was not the love of her life... barely married 5 years but she is behaving as if he was the greatest husband on earth... he wasn't. Marriage was not all that and yet... she will drive you crazy with her demeanor. They were not even on the same league. Our assumption was she just wanted to piss husband number 2 with the worst husband she could find... and she did. I didn't saw that one coming. Congratulations on finding strength to continue going on. I don't know how I will handle what you going thru. But I had prepared myself already the way I always heal. In advance, writing songs about the negatives on life... That includes a watchmaker losing his wife and fixing all clocks to work backwards trying to buy her time on earth with him. May you live a long life to find love again.

Yep. I was widowed in 2006 by cancer. Have stayed single since, raising our kids. The youngest graduates this year!

Religious platitudes can be terrible. I found strength in an online group, widda.org.

Sorry that you had to join the widow ranks.

I'm so sorry for you loss. Like you there were no non-faith support groups and I got a lot of faith based responses, I think mainly because no one really know what to say. I met a lady by chance about a month after my husban passed. Instead of the usual resposes she offered this suggestion.

She said...cry when you feel like it, yell and scream when the urge hits you. If you want to have an all out temper tantrum then go for it and when you find yourself laughing at something, don't feel guilty, enjoy it. Just let the feeling flow over you don't surpress them and soon life will start again.

At first I just smiled and thanked her but later that evening...well...surfice it to say...I had a royal temper tantrum and when I was done I realised I felt a littel better, then surprised myself by laughing. I can't tell you the relief I felt in that moment. Things got a little better each day after that and I think of that lady with kind thoughts even though it has been seventeen years.

I hope this helps.

Yes. I lost my wife in 2014 and I was luck enough to have decent insurance. That allowed me to get my daughter some counseling. However, no support groups.

Sorry for your loss. I don't have any experience with widowhood (is that a word?) but I do know what it's like to have lost loved ones and be offered "thoughts and prayers," told "he/she is in a better place," and invited to pray about it.

I know how meaningless those platitudes sound, but if it helps, remember most people who say those things are sincere in their beliefs. Or at least, they are trying to convince themselves that they believe.

With widowing no, but with coping with a traumatic loss of a loved one, yes.

Losing my papa gave me severe PTSD and I'm still not really able to process my grief, but any support groups or emergency therapists I could find always spew the same sentimental garbage "he's in a better place. Look to god. God doesn't give us more than we can handle. I'm praying for you. How do you think he feels seeing you like this?" Blah blah blah. Oh and of course the guilt of "well if you really think you have PTSD why don't you meet with vets" and "have you tried getting over it?"

None of those hollow platitudes helped. What did help was actually finding a therapist who didn't use god to heal others. Meds helped. Talking with my friends helped. God? Not even a sympathy card.

Welcome to the asylum!
I was widowed at 19. I get it. I was surrounded by people who offered nothing
else but "thoughts and prayers" and how it as all "god's will".
I moved away.