I enjoy my solitude for the most part but at times I feel like it would be nice to have some folks around.. I'm not particularly close to my family and between my time in the military and my new job Ive kinda fallen out of the loop with my friends back home.. On top of all that I recently moved to New Mexico and I don't really know anyone and its difficult to get into the community. ..

Don't get me wrong.. I'm fine by my lonesome and all that but at times some social interaction would be lovely.

Gee, very touching. Never new there are so many categories of loneliness since I know only one category: mine...... I do miss the very same things you so vividly described. I don't know what my IQ is ( not interested to know either), all I know is that I made it all the way to a master's degree as a pleasant and best experience. PhD didn't happen only because life happens. I've seen my better days, daughters grown up and out of the house (as it should be since always taught them to be independent). All in all, its all good and yet loneliness is a big part of my life. Last time I check, I am not dead yet !!!.... If any of that resonates with you then please send me a note, would you? Cheers !!

I too have a high IQ and with that I see things differently . the loneliness is a special one . I see people, such as trump supporters and wonder if that ignorance is indeed bliss. Not knowing the truth and not wanting to read about truth and then being able to function peacefully within your self has got to be a nice thing. As for me, I am cursed with intellect and must seek out the truth at all times. Sometimes it is lonely but so rewarding.

alone but not lonely...I spend a lot of time alone on purpose.

I have many reasons for feeling alone. But I don't.

I used to, before I acknowledged my male side in 2014, named him, and allowed him to "exist." I felt alone and lost all my life, although I was raised in a loving family, surrounded by siblings and friends. I also felt that way when married, with two children. But after I allowed myself to love my male side and accepted it, the loneliness was eased.

I do have many reasons for feeling alone, however:

1.high IQ. I don't think like most people I know.

2.I'm multicultural/multilingual. I grew up in Haiti with American parents and a French/African culture with European friends, and friends from the Domican Republic, across the border from Haiti. So I grew up speaking French, Creole, Spanish, and English.

3.I'm part Native American, and share many of their attitudes and beliefs, almost instinctlively. As a "two spirit," I would have been trained as a shaman in my Cherokee tribe.

4.I'm demisexual, panromantic, androgynous, nonbinary, and partially transmale. That means that I don't strongly identify with either gender, but see myself more as a blend. Also, I'm not sexually attracted to anyone of any gender, until after over a year together.

5.I'm over 65 years old.

6.I have strong psychic powers. I have to block myself from the thoughts and feelings of others but there is always some "leakage."
That's why I like being in Thailand..all those peaceful feelings of being one with the universe sooth me.

All 6 apply in far too many ways. This site does help w/ #4 & #2 to a certain extent, but it is still, by its nature, impersonal. Some of it is my fault, I isolate, outcome of chronic pain & chronic depression. But the emptiness seems blacker & deeper all the time & can be nigh near suffocating. I've lived with the depression since I can remember, & the pain for over a decade. I am the major caregiver for my 88 yo Mother, so that keeps me anchored, but that is one of the only things. I enjoy learning, experiencing & satisfying my curiosity, but that seldom balances the blackness. When my Mom goes, that may be the last anchor. Time will tell.

Look how many responses to your post! Indeed, no one is alone in being lonely! So have you all managed to sustain the social interaction of dialogue at least online? And can anyone join in? But I must confess frustration as I only see here a great deal of "sharing," Much said and little done or even strategized. I For years I remain desperate even to seriously discuss my own proposed remedy at [FoolQuest.com]

I find that traveling can give me a different perspective, help me meet people, and give me confidence to build new relationships in my own city. If you can't move to another place where you'll have more in common with other people, maybe you can go on a trip to a beautiful challenging hike with a group of people you've never met and set the refresh button.

Not really. I've been single for YEARS now, and I can't even imagine dating again at this point. Too much outside my comfort zone.

Loneliness kills! I'm literally trying to save my life, here.

I'm damn lonely! During the early autumn things become worse, as this is when I lost my love to her brain tumour back in 2015.
She knew I hate being alone, and tried to get me to take a lover before she died. She wanted to check them over to make sure they'd be good for me! Doing that isn't part of who I am.
I keep myself busy with a college degree course and working far too many hours. Now at least, I can get to talk people who when hearing my life story don't offer their prayers. June, my late wife, was also a questioner of religion.

I am alone but not lonely. I have opted out of the social game. As an introvert by nature and nurture, it just doesn't do much for me.
Forums like these is almost too much social interaction.

1,2,5, & 6. I got over 2 by not caring anymore. Since we are all facing death, 6 is a tough one.

I have experienced 1, 3, and 5, but do not feel lonely. An emotionally healthy person learns to adapt and cope instead of feeling powerless and alone. At age 81, I am not far from death, but have never felt cosmic loneliness. It is a natural fact that all lives end.

Just over the hill from you and experience loniness often enough. The winters here can be brutal as the weather makes it even more difficult to get out.

Wonderful post. It is challenging to be smart. No easy answers. I admire you for not lowering your standards.

A thought: Join a CrossFit box. No headphones.

1 through 5 to an extent or more. But am an introvert. Always relieved to come home, my happy space. I go through periods of trying to be more social, but often feel like I wasted my time. Self imposed loneliness. Usually feel more intelligent, but is that a rationalization. Delusion. Lmao.

All but 6.

Literate Hiker, I empathize. Since my divorce I have been teaching in remote communities. Four years I taught in a small rural town in southern Colorado. The people were nice, but all were deeply involved with their church activities and/or their families. There was no one my age or like-minded to hang with.

Two years ago I took a job teaching Science on the Navajo Reservation. I live in the housing compound associated with the school. That unfortunately is no help. 60% of the houses are unoccupied. Those that are occupied belong to primarily Native families which pretty much keep to themselves. They come home, go inside and do not go outside until time for work the next morning. I'm only 12 miles from town, but can't afford time or time or finances to go in every day.

Except for the decade I was married, I've generally done things on my own. But there are times when the lack of compsnionship or someone to talk to does weigh upon a bofy. Espescially like you, I am highly intelligent and love a good conversation.

Hang in there.

4 & 5

Mostly 2 and 6 for me. I've always felt like an outsider and like I'm on the periphery of a social group, even among my close friends. Hell, most of my primary group of friends only met each other because of me, most of our social activities take place at my house, and I still feel like I exist only on the fringes

Are there any Mensa groups nearby? Art classes? Museums needing volunteers? Ask if you can mentor younger people.

When I tied regular dating sites - id meet a nice girl (this happened at least about a dozen times) and everything was going well a few of them had fallen hard for me very soon and we were soo happy - but the subject of religion had never come up? When it finally did and I told them I don't believe in god? they dumped me like I had the plague - the hypocrites? They don't even follow their own religious rules? but the fact that I don't believe in god? was a reason to end a potentially really great relationship = its such a stupid reason to not want to date someone that might be a awesome partner or maybe even ur soulmate - ready to give up

I am 65, live alone (since 1998) with my cat, dog, mustang horse and donkey, am permanently single by choice, and I have learned to truly enjoy my separateness from others. There are times, however, when I do hunger for intellectual stimulation/interaction and a gay community since I live a fairly reclusive life in the country, in Texas, where it is very republiCon, and very bible belt. Fortunately, there are places like this website where one may interact for some intellectual play.

I've got 1, 5 in spades, and being a 20+ year southern state expat a touch of 3.
I stumbled into a community that gives me just enough purpose and emotional satisfaction that I'm mostly ok with my solitude, for now anyway. Attempting to slowly rebuild my life after the shock of 5.