How do you deal with Holiday family gatherings?
We normally get together on Christmas Day, even though my family is agnostic/atheist, we like to use this time to reconnect and exchange gifts for the kids. My brother is now with someone new who doesn’t believe in family gatherings. I was just informed that they are coming Tuesday instead of Wednesday because they want to do their own thing on Wednesday. Fine, I won’t be there. I have to work and then go to a party. Thanks for changing the plans to suit your self absorbed desires.
Can you say pussy whipped?? My brother is such a freaking wimp he does everything she tells him to do. They can enjoy time with the parents, I have plans I am not willing to change. I’ll leave their gifts for them and carry on with my life.
What dysfunctional things happen with your holiday family gatherings?
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35 comments (26 - 35)
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.we have a christmas tradition me and the wife. Being Jewish we go out for chinese food and then a movie
bklynite53
Level 7
Dec 23, 2019
1
Christmas conflict, I suspect, is a well-hackneyed cliche.
I don’t know of anyone who has Christmas conflicts anymore than any other time.
Having said that the heady mix of alcohol and ancient grievances become very real for some people I understand.
Geoffrey51
Level 8
Dec 23, 2019
1
Finally got the tree up last night. I have to wrap the presents which all came from a very inexpensive store. I'm not sure about the dinner yet. Vegetarian but my daughter bought a Ham. I'm not expecting anything. I just do it to make my mom happy.
confidentrealm
Level 7
Dec 23, 2019
1
When my mom and dad had it, siblings wandered in and out. Eating time was always about waiting for someone to show up
A pain in the ass and I lost respect, as no respect was given, for the whole bunch of them.
Christmas I'm making a turkey and eating at 1 pm.
Eating Alone is a possibility..... LoL
twill
Level 7
Dec 23, 2019
1
Tonight is the gathering I'm dreading. It's my immediate family and their kids/grandkids. I'm highly outnumbered by the religious members and I know there'll be "reason for the season" memes and a long prayer, but hopefully the rest will just be eating food and enjoying the company of family I don't visit much.
Eazyduzzit
Level 7
Dec 23, 2019
1
just go and enjoy whoever shows up and keep your mouth shut for a day and be grateful for what you have if brother is happy be ok with that
whiskywoman
Level 8
Dec 23, 2019
0
I have other plans. That’s the point. He changed it last minute because that’s what he wants to do. I am not changing my plans for him. Plus, I’m in charge of the food for the party.
@helionoftroy id stick to my original plan changing should be mutual
Sorry you're disappointed by the change in the family holiday situation.
I've learned that change is inevitable,so I don't get terribly bothered when
plans are altered.
Personally, I eschew most traditions. I'm grateful I am not expected to
participate in many of them.
Maybe your brother's new relationship will be a long-term thing and next year,
she'll be more amenable to spending family-time together.
If the relationship is new, she may not be very comfortable around new people.
Perhaps, once she's had more of a chance to get to know your family better, she'll
be more in favor of family gatherings.
KKGator
Level 9
Dec 22, 2019
0
This is the third year she’s changed family traditions and he’s allowed it. She’s also Jewish so she doesn’t care about what we normally do and has been forcing her desires onto us.
@helionoftroy I get it. She's not interested in becoming a part of your family and participating with the things your family does.
Thing is, he's allowing it. If he cared about spending family time with you, it would happen.
I see it much less about her than him. He wants to keep her happy.
He's going to do what he thinks he needs to in order for that to happen.
@KKGator I think you are right unfortunately.
@KKGator Yes, I agree.
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