"Dignified transfer." That's what the military calls the solemn process of returning fallen heroes to the family they loved and the country they served. If you have ever witnessed it, you're never quite the same after. August 13, 1998, was by far the most difficult day I had as a senior White House aide to President Clinton. Al Qaeda terrorists led by Osama bin Laden had bombed our embassies in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, and Nairobi, Kenya, a week earlier. Twelve Americans were killed; some were State Department servants, others were Marines. All were heroes.