My favorite all time joke:

A father and his young son were driving in the car and saw two dogs having sex in a yard. The little boy asked "Daddy, what are those dogs doing?"

His father replied "Those dogs love each other and are trying to make some puppies so they can have a family."

The little boy replied "Oh, that's nice" and they continued on their way home.

Later that night the boy is in bed and hears some noises in his parents' room. He walks in and sees his father on top of his mother and asks "Daddy, what are you doing?"

His father replied "Well, you see I love your mother very much and we are trying to make a baby sister for you."

The little boy says "Oh, I see. Mommy, could you roll over? I'd rather have a puppy."

My girlfriend went to the beauticians the other day, got the whole works done.

I told her that I thought they'd been a bit overenthusiastic when plucking her eyebrows.

She looked surprised.

An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we can cut off a man's testicles, put them on another man and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work".
The German doctor says: "that's nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work".
The Russian doctor says: "gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another's chest and in 2 weeks he is looking for work".
The United States doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Three years ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart and no balls and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"

What do you call a bad circumcision?

A rip-off.

This is fun.

When I was a kid this was a dirty joke:
What starts with f and ends with uck and is really exciting?

A fire truck !

Good ones!

What kind of wood doesn't float?

Natalie...

I knew an cavalry captain who loved his horse ........
.......
He got twenty years for that.

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
One’s really heavy and the other’s a little lighter.

What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.

Everyone knows about Murphy's Law.
But people have to have Cole's Law pointed out -- it's just thinly sliced cabbage.

Why was the pony coughing, he was a little horse!

Two nuns in the showers. One says, where's the soap? The other says, yes it does, doesn't it.
(Ok, maybe not so clean, but if you're old enough to understand it then you're old enough to hear it)

What's the difference between a chocolate laxative and Epsom Salts?
....
....
About ten seconds.

I don't usually tell jokes but this is a funny meme I saw recently.

Ok, what does a snail say when riding on a turtle?

I started collecting jokes back in 1979 when I got my first email account, but right now I can't think of a short one. Here's a very very old one:

Q. What did Princess Grace have that Natalie Wood wished she had?
A. A stroke

whats black and white and red all over,,newspaper or blushing nun