This is somewhat of a sombre topic, even though I am having a good day. Was looking at myself in the mirror and started wondering what my elder-years were gonna look like. I am a life-coach and I know that 'old-age' is a moving target and it's formula is "n+15", with "n" being your current age. But what happens when health closes this gap and what happens to those of us who are single (either because we are single or because our significant other has preceded us). Started wondering if I will have enough money, food, and shelter. I need someone to love me and watch over me...I need to get me a dog!
I live alone and do not know if I need a dog. I do know that when I look in the mirror I see my grandfather. LOL
I do not feel any need to own a dog or any other pet for that matter. My attitude is ... I do not want anything that I have to feed, clean-up after or take care of. You do you, I do me and let's strive to do or cause no harm.
I get that. My mom pops up in my mirror.
I see my grandmother in my mirror way too often. Someone took a picture recently that included my hands, and all I could see were Nana's hands. It keeps one humble.
You're 48! That's not old.. Log out and start socializing with people..
Your only as old as you feel. I’ve heard people in their early and mid 20s complain that they feel “old”.
@Green_Soldier71 no I didn't but I suspect this isn't a recent issue for you...
@Green_Soldier71 you're welcome
I think a lot of people are assholes and if you can't find someone to put up with your crap, you're gonna die alone. Cynical I know. But true.
I have a pension, but even so am a huge tightwad because while I just may die without a partner, I'll still have money and being old and homeless is a real fear.
Don't worry about things you have no control over! My late wife and I met on an online dating service in our late 60's. and had 11 good years together. That was 3 years ago. While a dog is a great companion it;s just not on par with human companionship! I am now 83 and realize that anything can happen so why worry and socialize, not easy in a pandemic but there are ladies out there your age and intellect. While I'm looking for a companion, I have a pen pal, neighbors and family. Get to know people ; humor is a great tool! You're not old enough to be somber!!!
Wise words.
The other day, I got new reading glasses. Scary sight in the mirror. Now I leave the glasses on the desk before going into the bathroom. I like my illusions intact!
Yeah, that works and leaving the light off is a must in my case!
@Paganlyl If I turned the lights off, I would fall down
@Spinliesel Does that happen very often? Perhaps the switch is not properly grounded!
I am 63, and will be 64 in January. Last week I was in my twenties, or so it feels. In some ways I am a sage and in other ways I seem to have learned nothing. My sense of humor has matured, but I still love to laugh. My default setting is "mostly happy." My body started betraying me with chronic illness before I was out of my teens, so I don't remember what it feels like to go for days without pain. I may be impoverished beyond the ability to survive in a few years, and I wish I had had the means to prepare for that better. One thing is certain, nobody will want to take care of me after I can't do for myself. I do not expect that.
i know it's old..but just live & try to enjoy one day at a time. don't look out more than a year bc no one has a clue what will happen.
@callmedubious You're right. I savor every day and consider it a gift.
Get a dog, sure. The need to walk it can provide a hedge against illness, help keep you in shape.
If "old age" is n+15, I won't be old until a week before I'm 93!
You are a "Life Coach," and I am a retired psychotherapist, who believes that living a life of authenticity is a key to well being, physically, and emotionally.
The ugly reality of getting older is that you become invisible. Or more invisible, in th case of many women.
There’s a great scene about that in Netflix series, Frankie and Grace, I’m currently binge watching it
@girlwithsmiles I love that show big time!
That sounds incredible... I am looking forward to being invisible to teen pervs and senior pervs (older than my dad or grampa trying to hit on me) and finally being left alone at ALL times, not just most times.
I don't know who will find my corpse. I should probably get a dog. More needy than a cat, more enthusiastic, needs to be "walked" every day.
There are organisations that will give you a daily call if you’re seriously worried about that, my friend in her 80’s gets a call every day.
Welcome to the site.
Dogs are awesome! But responsibility as well... as any other living animal that you bond with.
The money situation is scary, specially as we age and our health starts asking for it too.
I think if you keep good habits and you are a happy person, someone will cross your pathway.
@Green_Soldier71 haha
Both I guess. I was referring to a humam being, but since you asked, my thrid dog addition crossed my pathway as a stray.
@Zoohome , beautiful dog!
@Merseyman1 thank you! He is a cutie and such a sweet personality. You just look at him and his tail does circles, really funny to watch.
If you get a puppy remember to tip it upside down. If it struggles a lot it will be more challenging to train than one that doesn’t. Choose according to your experience
@Green_Soldier71 it’s for real, i have a keen interest in training dogs. Works best for a litter of puppies, you can watch them first and then compare them with the, ‘wriggle test’
@girlwithsmiles I used to train and breed Bouviers and when I got my then gf and now wife her first dog I did the puppy test by holding the puppy in my hand with it's belly up because I didn't want my wife to have to struggle with an Alpha pup. My wife is a cat person by nature and an Alpha Bouv is the last thing for her but my choice for pick of litter pulled on over on me, maybe she just had gas when I did the test but she barely squirmed at all which should indicate a Beta dog (limp and listless could indicate a Delta dog). Breanna turned out to be all Alpha Bouv, her name in Gaellic means 'a great disturbance'.
I have had good success using the puppy test in the past but this time it was completely off the mark.
@Surfpirate oops, well i guess there are exceptions. Good to know I’m not the only one using the method.
@girlwithsmiles I trained my Bouvs using the System of Ghent, I highly recommend it but only if you are willing to put in a lot of time and effort, similar to Schutzhund training but much more restrained in the use and escalation of the level of protection. Breanna was a great disturbance but very well trained, lol.
A dog will get you out for regular walks which is good for your health.
At 48 you're a kid to many of us. It is for us to think about what you're thinking when we reach the late sixties. It is difficult to find a good partner when young or at any age, but when you are mature is even more difficult because mature people is already shaped, more difficult or unwilling to adapt, we all have routines, vices, peculiarities and ways to act even in sex. If you are wise and you find someone wise then you might negotiate and work thing out, it is not impossible. You should always leave a door open for this. But get the dog, it's the best company.
About your elder years. You have a choice to live life to the fullest, travel, enjoy and have a vast amount of happy memories, or live an austere life and have a lot in the end; or look for a balance of those. There's no correct answer, it depends on every individual...
Get the dog...and the woman who adores you.
Don't worry too much and be prepared for that golden age. I'm much older than you and here I'm dancing or try to do whatever I want that will bring me joy.