@Roxbb78

What makes you think I want to get married? I refuse to live with a man again. Too much of a burden.

In a committed, loving relationship, I insist on monogamy. Don't want to be exposed to STDs.

It is painful to love an emotionally constipated, commitment-phobic man. Say "I love you" and he panics and runs. I speak from experience.

That's not true. I myself have become physically aroused when a lady made a reference to the series Firefly. If that isn't sapiosexual, I'd like to know what is.

@Fernapple

With online dating, it feels like I'm dealing with leftovers. Many divorced men were dumped for a darn good reason. Unwilling to change, they take the same bad behavior to the next relationships.

The last guy I talked with had no visible sense of humor. He repeatedly lectured me on history. It was tiresome. I see why his wife left him.

@LiterateHiker Seriously, perhaps the best way to find a good partner, is to cultivate the widest possible circle of high quality friends of your own sex. (Applies to both men and women.) Because few people can resist the thrill of matchmaking, and you then get to find the best choices in your circle of like minded people as soon as they become available.

Actually when I did online dating I'm pretty sure I met some very nice guys. I also met some rejects.They just didn't happen to appeal to me or I didn't happen to appeal to them. Of course at my age some of them are widowers. Widowers are not real rejects. My girlfriend kept telling me I needed to at least date any of them twice because the first date everyone is so nervous it is hard to really know someone. I'm trying to remember if I ever said yes to that second date with any of them and the answer is no. There was never any spark, electricity or attraction and it was true that they all seemed to be into monologues.

@LiterateHiker, @Fernapple if women were less interested looks, power, and bravado, they might encounter more "good" men.

@Lorajay That is sad, I know when I was newly widowed the message went round the grape vine, and in no time I had three lady friends, who all wanted to date me in pretty quick time. But I was not ready and we soon moved on, and I guess that eventually the grape vine was sending out the message, that I was not interested. Which in some ways was a shame because a couple of years down the line, I easily could be. But it is because of that personal experience, that I recommended enlarging the grape vine by cultivating more friends, as perhaps the best way forwards.

@BitFlipper

Don't generalize about women.

My first husband Tim looked like a Troll doll. Tim was brilliant and hilarious. He was my best friend at the University of Michigan.

@Fernapple the numbers are against women because we live longer than men so there are a lot more single women in my age group than there are men. Add in a liberal atheist in one of the reddest states in America and that leaves only two guys and they're both married LOL. Then there's the three others that I'm not interested in but they're interested enough in me they're not about to find me a date.

@Lorajay And there is a whole ocean between us, or I would be on the next bus. But never give up hope, and remember, one good friend is worth a thousand poor lovers.

A man who will lie to his wife isn't going to be honest with any woman he intends to cheat with on said wife. And once you know a man lies about anything to anyone, how can you possibly tell when he's not lying? And why would you ever want to waste a minute of your time playing that ceaseless guessing game?