In reference to the image meme;
If you were raised a theist, what (approximate) age were you when started to question/be skeptical of what you were taught, and what was the bit of information that swayed you to not believe anymore?
For the Atheists and Agnostics -- have you convinced other adult theists to rethink and leave their faith?
9
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I drifted in and out of belief throughout my childhood and adulthood. I didn't stop believing in the "metaphorical cult" as fernapple puts it until middle age when I decided to transition. Since this condemned me to hell for almost all xtians and the magical unitarians (yes magical, they incorporate wicca into their practice where I attended) didn't attract me any longer. But my first dalliance with atheism was when I was a teen and taking confirmation classes for the Roman Catholic church.
Theresa_N
Level 8
Dec 18, 2022
1
I too drifted in and out as i got older. While younger, I was use to being told what to do, follow order, and was told when I got older I can decide what to do with my life. Unfortunately, when I told my dad and his wife I don't follow Catholicism / god-belief anymore, they were shocked and saddened. I comforted them with, "Don't worry, I'll still visit during Xmas and easter and all the months between." At least we compromised.
Sorry this will be a long one, I can't make it shorter.
I took a more convoluted route, since like many in the UK I was raised as only a nominal Christian, with little real contact with the actual faith. I did however grow up thinking that people who embraced such a selfless value system, as that preached by Jesus, must be basically very good people, though my family cast doubts on the validity of the more extreme forms.
I did however, like many in the UK, where the schools were largely controlled by the church, end up going to a Christian school. Where I was sadly disillusioned, to find that many who preached and followed Christianity, were often in fact quite horrible people, and their professed Christian values shallow. While being raised to ask questions and respect science and evidence, I soon found it hard to believe literally as I was asked to. Especially so, after my school teachers forbade the reading of the classical literature of Rome and Greece. Because, they said, it was wholly out of date, immoral, and of no worth in the modern Christian world. So of course being a child, and being told not to do something, I read all of them I could get. I only half understood them, and I do not now, agree with much of what I read, but they did tell me, that there were alternate views to the Christian dogma, and that the Christians did not have a monopoly on virtue. (Also that my school teachers told lies.)
I was then, at about thirteen or fourteen, introduced to the metaphorical cult, where religion is seen as a metaphor, not to be taken literally, but to be interpreted as containing deep wisdom, ( Often hidden and cryptic wisdom. ) which is today, the main cult among the English clergy. And for a while it seemed to resolve all the problems. But then at higher education I met a school master, perhaps the most horrible and dishonest of all people I ever met, who espoused the metaphorical cult as his main ideology, but used it to justify the most horrible extremes of racism, class bias and sexism.
At which point I learned that wisdom could not be based on interpretation alone, and that things which are most open to interpretation, but are still treated with respect as supposed sources of deep ( Magical.) wisdom, are the natural intellectual weapon of the criminally minded. And I became aware of the deep dishonesty of a clergy, who preached literal belief to the congregation on Sunday, and reaped the benefits of that, while talking the metaphorical cult among themselves on weekdays. Who poured scorn on science, yet made claims that their wild metaphorical interpretations came with the same rigour, and the same value as science. The relativists, many different ways of seeing the truth, but all equal, view, and that hard work, courage and rigour, such as that shown by science, is essentially effort wasted, when equal wisdom comes, equally well, from sitting comfortably in the warm, reading confirmation biased literature written by fellow theists.
At which point I lost it with religion.
Fernapple
Level 9
Dec 18, 2022
2
Same, the more I was told not to do something, the more i sought out the answers elsewhere. I recall meeting other (older than me) Atheists growing up, having these exact discussions with them (me as a believer, and them trying to convince me) and to be honest, I didn't have the mental maturity to grasp the logical concepts despite struggling with the morale aspect. As I got older, moved out (age 25), life was viewed through a different lens, ownership and accountability couldn't be deflected onto the devil or temptation, it was essentially all me, all along.
I was probably around 7 years old, when I started questioning what the nuns were teaching in catechism class. The fact that my questions couldn't be answered satisfactorily and my inability to believe I had a guardian angel watching over me, had me questioning during my whole childhood. I was the only one of my siblings who was allowed to drop out of catechism, never got confirmed, nor married in the church, where all my siblings did. My family was fine with me being the odd one out during my childhood.
I would never try to talk someone out of believing what is core to their sense of values, but I don't mind saying things that get them questioning. I got a little bit of grief from family members in my later years. My younger sister seemed to want to paint me as unenlightened to her children. Whatever.
I prefer to just be happy with my thoughts and leave them to theirs, unless and until they impose them on me. It was mostly my in-laws, later in life, who took offense with my spiritual views and excluded me from family gatherings since I wouldn't believe in their reason for gathering during the holidays. No matter anymore, since I left their family to be on my own. Now I don't feel like I have any family, except for my children and grandchildren and that's okay with me.
Julie808
Level 8
Dec 18, 2022
3
Wow! Age 7!
I have a slightly older sister, who Im extremely close with. She was driven scholastically gifted (first honour roll, graduating most of her years with 100% perfect in high school, Harvard Scholarship) and was the one who introduced me to Richard Dawkins (early 30s). My parents, mostly my dad was the one who considered me the odd one out, called me "the odd ball" because I was not like my sister. Her and I are both Agnostic with me leaning more towards 7/9 scale where as she is more a 5/9.
I've always been the black sheep of the family and at social gatherings with other relatives, I was know to be typically incongruent to the 'flock', which I'm totally OK with.
@MacStriker One of my grandmothers was secretly atheist, even though she kept a bible prominently on the end table by her couch. (She confided to me that she only kept it there to help her with crossword puzzles.) I think I was likely the only one of my siblings with whom she confided and confessed to as not believing in religion, which seemed to make it okay for me to be who I was/am. She said she had a hard time believing that the successful politicians actually believed what they professed to believe religiously, but they had to pretend, since atheists were thought of so poorly. She and I had some interesting conversations, that I understood to be confidential, since my family were all church goers.
Since my grandparents were the proprietors of the only tavern midway between 2 towns (Chehalis and Centralia Washington) and lived above the bar, not the best environment for their young daughter, they sent my mom (an only child) to Catholic boarding school and then on to Seattle University where she met my dad. So, we were raised Catholic. Not sure either of my parents really believed what the church was teaching, but they went along with it, since respectable families went to church.
Me dropping out of catechism dubbed by the nuns as a "doubting Thomas" wasn't a big deal to my parents. My siblings, well my sisters at least, romanticized religion and likely felt their appearance of belief elevated their status in the eyes of others. My brothers were likely closet atheists, but didn't want to rock the boat. I'm the rebel of the family. Now, with our parents both gone and one brother gone as well, I don't really communicate with my remaining siblings. That's fine with me.
I am an outspoken atheist/agnostic humanist living a good life, authentic to myself and my true inner beliefs. They are living their lives in the best way they know how with what they intellectually allow themselves to believe. They may consider me "unenlightened" but to be honest, I think they are secretly jealous of me. They are not brave enough to live their authentic lives, or even to speak up in my defense against those who paint all atheists as immoral -- because they might secretly be atheist and don't want to admit it. I don't know and I don't care anymore.
It was at age 30 that I realised the importance of falsifiable evidence to the human condition, and that all theists were complete failures at producing such evidence.
I have a very dear friend who is losing her faith; she sees the disjunction between what she was taught about the Biblical God and the actuality of human suffering.
anglophone
Level 9
Dec 17, 2022
3
I'd say in my early 30's is when I too solidified my non-god-belief. My cousin (similar in age to me) as he got older, who was essentially raised by a father who is Atheist, ended up developing a god-belief.
Seth from Thinking Atheist i think covered the stages of what one goes through when they lose their faith. it's not easy, different for most, but one stage that i feel is common for most is that feeling of being duped for so long and trying to fix things for the future.
- A paragraph in Age Of Reason made me read the book and that put an end to dogmatic beliefs. I was a newly baptized Mormon, at the time, so this was significant. I have regretted it ever since (SMH. That's not true).
rainmanjr
Level 8
Dec 17, 2022
2
I will definitely have to check out that book! Thank you!
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