No this was not a dumb question. Feel free to ask more

Depends on what the dynamic of what the relationship is. If you're looking for a professional service or are you looking for a playmate or are you looking for a mistress to being an actual relationship with you. At any rate the biggest thing is being respectful. If you are not respectful and in some case overly respectful. A dominatrix will immediately send you away. No dominatrix that I have known or worked with respond to someone who is not respectful. Any good dominatrix is going to be understanding of a new person coming up to them and talking to them and not knowing what to say or how to act. It's not until you actually talk to someone and you find out if you are compatible not just in a physical manner but on wants desires and capability. That things are discussed such as how she used to be addressed how she is to be treated expectations on both sides. So the biggest thing is when you do approach a dominatrix that you do not know or you do not know how she works or what her rules are the biggest thing is always being respectful let her take the lead feel free to ask questions do not be blunt and do not be crude. Being a professional dominatrix runs into a few different rules and regulations versus someone that you're looking to have a relationship with versus someone that you're just looking to play with for a while

I’m just a beginner...but usually it comes up when getting acquainted. The topic goes to sex, and what we each like and want to try. (Which I like to be open about and rather talk about it sooner than later.) Once in awhile, the potential partner just asks up front, which is fine too. Sometimes it’s just about sex, a few hookups, and that’s ok. I’ve heard of more elaborate arrangements, but so far mine have been verbal consent.