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I never thought of loneliness as a deserted island. It's being surrounded by people and not being able to relate to anyone. It's a chain of no invitations. Noninclusion. Just generally, unaccepted or invalid

Phyphrus 5 May 16
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I know what you mean. Nothing is worse than being around others, and still being lonely. I have lived in the same place for 13+years and my only friend is my neigjbor, but I stay away most of the time because I don't want to be a downer. I have two sons that come and go. The younger one is pretty social, but I've always been the mom. He'd let me hang out with him and his friends sometimes, but he'd get annoyed eventually and tell me it was time for me to go to bed. Or with my sons, they expected me to be June Cleaver, and I never was. I don't think I will ever find my people. Maybe they don't exist.

Hellas Level 6 Sep 26, 2018

Interesting phrase, "my people."

I wonder if a sense of community is what inspired Dan Harmon show by the same name.

@Phyphrus not familiar with the show. Will looki it up

@Phyphrus i didnt find My People, but Iostened to his Google talk and Just started listening to his Master Class on Comedy. He's interesting to listen to. Not familiar with most of his work, though my younfer son and hus girlfriend are big Rick and Morty fans; i saw some of it, and found it ugly and grotesque.

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Although I get along with the neighbors in my building, I am not close to any of them. The fact that I suffer from major depression puts up some blocks between myself and the others around me, and I rarely get invited by anyone in my building to visit.

I have a very limited social life, but I hope to broaden it soon by trying out going to Unitarian Universalist Church in my area. Hopefully I can meet some intelligent, open-minded people and make some new friends.

It'd be nice to have community centers so people wouldn't need church

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I have severe depression amongst other things. Agoraphobia seems to come with territory. Loneliness too. It's a powerful feeling to be surrounded by people and feel like no one is there. Worse to be an outsider in every situation.

Psychology and sociology can help. Start taking classes, or reading books. Once you stop artificially self-diagnosing, it helps.

Keita Level 5 June 22, 2018

Taking classes or reading are good ways to occupy your mind. I also love listening to music
(mainly 60's and 70's, more recently Alanis Morissette and Loreena McKennitt).

If possible/practical, consider getting a dog, or other pet. A dog means you have to drag yourself out two or three times a day, and it inevitably leads to talking to other dog owners! Pets are generally regarded as therapeutic.

Ah, the outsider. The fringe. The stranger. Yeah, the feeling of otherness is almost distinct inofitself

0

That sounds really sad. Do you have any tried and true methods of picking yourself up when you feel this way?

Arielle Level 4 June 17, 2018

With genuine depression it's incredibly difficult to bootstrap your own way out of it, often the best you can do is find distractions...

1

Not sure if I'd be a loner or a lone Wolf, ? ?

millymac7 Level 2 June 10, 2018

Lonely and alone are indeed two different kettles of dormice... Do you tend to howl at the moon or bite when annoyed?

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