Anxious boredom is the hardest thing about sobriety for me. Distractions are good but, the number one thing to do, according to AA, and even science, and I hate to hear this, too, is to help someone else in some way. The 10th step, in the big book on page 84, says to:

Continue to watch for selfishness dishonesty resentment and fear. When these crop up ask God at once to remove them (whatever that means). Discuss it somebody immediately make amends if necessary. Resolutely turn my attention someone I can help.

This is a mantra for me. Helps me remember what I’m supposed to do when it’s hardest to remember what I’m supposed to do.

I ignore God in the big book the same way I ignore the character I don’t like in my favorite TV show. . Also, I would take as much melatonin as is safe. That helped. I don’t take it anymore.

Sober 5 years (this time). I had 10 years but drank again in 2005 and continued until January 21, 2013.

Sobriety is never not worth it.

Make it through the night. Maybe a meeting tomorrow?