Wonder for how long it would work...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 10, 2021:

That should do it. I remember Johnny Carson tell a story about putting toilet paper across a curve in a road as a kid. Said it looked like a wall. As a teen, I thought about doing that, or talking someone else into doing it.

Feel the need to innocently upset a white Christian today? I got you.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 16, 2021:

That happened before white Jesus wrote the King James version in English for the true believers.

Fox News Hosts Cheer On Southern Secession Movement As a further indication of how much radical ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 18, 2021:

Most of the South gets more back in federal funds than they pay in to the government. I expect if they seceded, lost all government benefits and when Texas got the shits of supporting them, they would reconsider. Sad how these dipshits can't think ahead. Let them go, pull all funds, move all military bases, cut all retirement, etc.

A busy road

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 22, 2021:

My Dad worked for the Pennsylvania road crews in the 60s. Once, he, on his own time cut down some bushes at a stop sign that interfered with one's ability to see. He did it on a Saturday; on Monday, his boss bitched at him because "what are we going to do next month."

Among Mormon Women, Frank Talk About Sacred Underclothes

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 22, 2021:

Such an inane thing. If I remember correctly, Mitt Romney refused to even acknowledge a question on his undies.

Um, it's a soul patch, all right?.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 23, 2021:

Sometimes, facial creations just don't work. I grow a good beard, and currently maintain my goatee; that said, in my youth I tried a Foo-Man-Chu and, ugh is the best I can say. Glad no photos exist.

Also, got any corn?

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 25, 2021:

I'll take the talking ducks over the bothersome sheeple any day.

He has a point.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 27, 2021:

Reminds me of a joke my 9th grade history teacher told. He thanked me for being the only person that laughed (I attribute that to being from a school in the boondocks). A Sadist and a Masochist go on a date. It is a lovely evening. They have a nice meal, then go to a show. On the way back to the Masochist's place, they stop for a drink to talk. Then the Sadist walks the Masochist up to their apartment. At the door, the Masochist can no longer contain their pent up desires. Falling prostrate, the Masochist begs, "Please, hit me, spank me, hurt me!" To which the Sadist replies, "No."

Kenneth Copeland: My Private Jet “Doesn’t Belong to the Lord… It’s Mine!” | Hemant Mehta |...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 2, 2021:

Some one should investigate tax fraud - "his jet" and how did he pay for it?

Hundreds arrested at Capitol while protesting for voting rights, minimum wage Monday's action on ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 3, 2021:

Meanwhike, among fox pundits and repucks, the right wingers destroying property can be seen as peaceful sightseers.

Trump Lawyer Consequences!: (CNN)Lawyers who attempted a class action lawsuit claiming voter fraud ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 5, 2021:

Finally some sense

Christians Erect Giant Cross Near Mississippi Highway After Raising $240,000 | Hemant Mehta | ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 14, 2021:

Is erecting a giant cross a symptom of smalldickitous?

Self-esteem matters! 😆

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 16, 2021:

Been there, done that. Always just praise.

According to Biden, “We gave them every chance to determine their own future.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 17, 2021:

The moment we (Bush/Cheney/Haliburton) started nation building, this was the foregone conclusion. Had we left the war lords in charge, with some military aid, they would have kept out most of the Taliban.

Cool: I was of the opinion, years ago, that evolution denying states ought to not get police DNA ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 17, 2021:

Unfortunately, some of those states would be OK with that because then they wouldn't need ANY DNA evidence to convict nor accept any DNA to acquit, and go back to just picking the people they dislike as quilty of all crimes.

Laura Prepon Says She’s ‘No Longer Practicing Scientology' | HuffPost

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 19, 2021:

Scientology is one of the worst and most crazy shit storms of control and fleecing of their flock. Most people who leave do so quietly so as not to get attacked or sued or harassed. Many countries, like Germany, don't even recognize them as a religion. Any religion that makes you sign a billion year "slave" contract should be outlawed simply for its illegal work with little or no pay requirements.

Rep.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 22, 2021:

He is a flag waving, evangelical member of the Amerikkka Taliban.

The double entendre on purpose

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 23, 2021:

But, GeeZeus came to Merica and wrote the bibly while riding a T-Rex and carrying an AR15 .

Contempt Hearing Set for AR State Sen.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 25, 2021:

If assholes would stop forcing their unconstitutional religious shit down the publics throats, this shot would be rare.

Christian Radio Host Slams NY Gov.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 25, 2021:

A very Talibanic attitude.

This came out when I was in Jr Hi, living in the heart of the super conservative south.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 27, 2021:

I was in Tucson in 76, visiting friends at the university. I was sitting on the green and a street preacher was shouting and gesturing, etc. He talked about this "evil" song luring him to the homosexual San Francisco. Then, some dude in a robe, throwing out wooden nickels for free beer at a bar showed up with his retinue. He started "preaching" for Satan. Both were shouting over one another. And then, a true hero emerged. Some one, dressed in a Spider-Man costume came and danced around them to the cheers of the crowd. My hero will always be Spider-Man.

you know she wants some of it.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 29, 2021:

That grosses me out; I expect she feels worse.

The Young Turks - Fox Guest Complains: We Have To Pay A Living Wage Now! [youtube.com]

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 11, 2021:

Whiney ass. Sounds like a dick to work for.

A couple of quick one-panels.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 13, 2021:

Both are right on. The first one is a gut laugher.

Man called largest child porn purveyor gets 27-year sentence

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 16, 2021:

Not long enough.

Mmmmmmmmmmm Bacon....

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 16, 2021:

Just be a Mormon, or is moron.

Anti-Yoga, Anti-Vax Republican Plans Primary Bid Against Alabama Gov.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 17, 2021:

More crazy. More like the Taliban everyday.

Brooklyn pastor offers religious exemptions for COVID vaccines - New York Daily News

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 17, 2021:

This is such bullshit. The military is getting it right - if you request a religious exemption, you damn sight better have a paper trail with other exemptions, or NO, not happening. I don't remember any exemptions when I was in; and apparently, very very few will get one in the military.

Volunteers needed.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 11, 2022:

Well, as a no longer long man, I must apologize now ladies, I can't do any more naked planting 😁😁😁

It seems our Christfool Adversaries are adding a newer complaint to their ever growing list.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 13, 2022:

Laugh or cry. I hadn't heard of these guys yet. To the wackos, this sounds like it could easily be believed. Of course there is "Birds Aren't Real" which is a satirical group that occasionally shows up at q events. Birds are now extinct after much government killing and have been replaced with look alike drones to spy on everyone.

I had to laugh, but I love the way she thinks.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 13, 2022:

Some years ago, a Walmart in Alabama was seen selling "Gun Oil" lubricant (a sexual lube) in their rifle section.

Dangerous Easter guys

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 13, 2022:

Peeps have only one worthwhile purpose in life - watching them blow-up in a microwave.

Well it looks like being both a fun late afternoon and a musical kind of evening around this ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 17, 2022:

I owned a house across from a catholic church in a small town. Some Sundays, especially if they parked, or should I say tried to park in my lane, I would crank up Frank Zappa's "Catholic Girls" for their listening pleasure.

What a shitty way to go!

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 18, 2022:

Nobles falling in shit - not a disaster

So many fails...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Apr 19, 2022:

Illegal in most places.

Their just aren't simple answers to complex questions no matte what you would like to believe

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 10, 2022:

Yup. Been saying that since high school - complex problems seldom, if ever, have easy answers. Yet, that ain't the Merican way.

Steely Dan [youtu.be]

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 14, 2022:

The lyrics would make a good "spaghetti" Western. Always enjoyed this song.

1 million deaths Remembering the lives lost to COVID-19 in America [axios.com]

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 16, 2022:

And the real number is probably higher.

[ancient-origins.net] The killer rabbit from the holy grail movie had historical connections

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 18, 2022:

Dang wabbits would be wuling the world if they had gotten the holy hand grenade.

About an hour ago decided to take a break from splitting, carrying and stacking firewood and sit on ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on May 24, 2022:

And I thought I had had an awful neighbor. We had a neighborhood party when she moved, after she couldn't put in a pool without neighbors granting her a waiver from borough rules. She was crazy as well - and a drunk. She sued us after we reported her for abusing her kid. The cops were at her place, often. (They said they once caught her having sex with her great dane). Best of luck mate.

Depp verdict is in and Johnny came out the victor.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 1, 2022:

The trial was ridiculous, especially as "news." 2 grown-ups who got married, then acted like children. My guess is their marriage mirrored thousands if not millions of other failed marriages. I paid little attention to the trial. What little I caught, I wouldn't want to spend much time with either one. It seems to me that both just wanted to hurt each other. That all said, Depp did appear to be slightly more of the adult.

Toy Story Part 19?

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 3, 2022:

Toy Story 20, The Rescue. A group of surviving toys plan and initiate an undertaking to dig up Andy's grave in order to save their friends trapped in the bony remains.

American Theocracy

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 5, 2022:

Yes, the Amerikkkan Taliban has grown and sunken its teeth into everything and fully into politics.

Some gifts are just perfect

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 7, 2022:

Until she learns and beats you into a pulp.

Pretty accurate

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 13, 2022:

But of course. Or should it read.... butt of course.

I see a country song in there somewhere.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 14, 2022:

He stopped loving her today Took her to the dump and Threw her away Many mourners came to play But he stopped loving her today

Letters From An American 06/15/2022

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 16, 2022:

It is a sad time, too many favor fascism to maintain the status quo, while others follow blindly behind the dog whistles used to control them.

Lady w long black hair for obvious reason 🙌🦇

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 17, 2022:

I rhink Denmark prison it is. We would have to do something really serious or they would deport us

YOUR LUCKY DAY The choices are many. Please pick your favorite.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 17, 2022:

Heresy Having electronics Immodest clothing, it is summer Eating babies Enough said

The best way to measure things.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 19, 2022:

Totally agree

I love haiku!

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 23, 2022:

A few were hilarious 🤣🤣🤣. Some are scary true. 👍

A new word is coined, "Stupidology" :-D

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jun 26, 2022:

The oil industry is not hurting when no one drives; that's for sure.

Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses may get access to elders' files on them

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 1, 2022:

Without a doubt, one should have access to any files on one's self. I suppose one possible exception could be classified files, and even then, I ask why are they classified. If the government or an other entity is spying on you, yes you should have access; if you are working on a classified project, not so much.

"I don't want to see religious bigotry in any form.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 4, 2022:

His son didn't agree. And, few evangelicals are noted for their staunch honesty.

What will this so called Conservative Court do if a case on creationism appears on their docket?

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 7, 2022:

Remember, the catholic justices aren't Jesuit, we teach evolution and science, catholics, they are the new breed evangelical catholics happy to fuck over and fuck up everyone and everything.

Dry toast and four fried chickens. And a coke. [m.youtube.com]

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 13, 2022:

Great movie with great lines. "We're on a mission from god." And later, "I hate Illinois Nazis." And so many more.

Donald Trump Already Fundraising Off Ivana Trump's Death As New York City police investigate ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 15, 2022:

What do the odds makers have for Trump attending the funeral? Or Melania? Melania could were her I Don't Care coat.

Maybe this is a dumb question however it needs to be asked.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 20, 2022:

Science actually says that we can see the edge of the known universe. Most likely there is something more out there. The catholic church helped fund one of the big telescopes in Arizona, VATT; some thought they were doing so to try and see god - maybe they were/are.

Dr. Oz Can't Stop Being Humiliated By John Fetterman's Memes - YouTube

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 21, 2022:

Oz is and always has been a medical shister. Now, he is adding politics to his resume. He should move back to Turkey where he holds dual citizenship and is good friends with Erdogan. There are people in Pennsylvania who will never vote Democrat; one just had to get them to not vote Oz - remind those xtion nuts that he's a Muslim and vegetarian, that should do it.

I don't think that's the answer she was looking for.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 22, 2022:

I'm sure there are still some Dukes of Hazzard types crawling through their windows out there.

I'm not sure who needs to see this, or even why?

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 23, 2022:

It's like car manuals - they used to explain how to set the points and timing and now warn against drinking radiator fluid.

Who can pick out the queen's jubilee picture?

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 28, 2022:

The Queen always wears something on her head, so it has to be the 2nd one, with tiara.

I actually have that cast iron mold, I may try this to see the reaction,

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 30, 2022:

If they have weed, I'll bite 😁😁

Marjorie Taylor Greene Says No One Can Convince Her Jan 6th Rioters Weren’t Antifa US Rep.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 8, 2022:

Hypocritical ass like most repucks

I was thinking the same thing.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 8, 2022:

All mushrooms are edible; it is just that some are only edible once.

Beau of the Fifth Column - Let's talk about Republicans calling for an FBI hearing.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 10, 2022:

Beau is usually correct. And again he is right on, the republicans only want to fire up their base - the part with no long term memory and little thinking ability.

A few to start the week.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 15, 2022:

While I wish that would happen, unless there is solid and such indisputable evidence of tRump himself giving away or selling classified materials, about the best we can realistically hope for is him being confirmed a felon and put under house arrest and not allowed to use the internet.

God's many servants

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 15, 2022:

Fairly accurate

I was in th Navy, an oldie but a goody.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 16, 2022:

I noticed the Airforce General was late again.

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 16, 2022:

No pleasing everybody

Sure feels that way

Beowulfsfriend comments on Aug 24, 2022:

That's why I don't look behind me.

ANOTHER THREAT RISING Clad in the teal unitard and pink cape that strike terror in purveyors of ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 2, 2022:

Leonard Pitts is a national treasure. The last time I taught Huck Finn, I introduced the novel with an essay by Pitts on why it should be taught and unaltered - to paraphrase, Pitts said, "When Huck uses the "N" word, he is using it in the vernacular of the time; however, when Tom uses the "N" word, he means it, the "N" word."

Yet another massive disaster. They just keep coming [accuweather.com]

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 6, 2022:

Most earthquakes aren't man induced, at least the big ones - not like the Oklahoma tremors. These just add to the already massive problems of drought, etc.

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 7, 2022:

Exactly 💯

Got a few interesting ones here.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 7, 2022:

Moose definitely have the right of way. Any large animal does. I stopped my car once, on a back road, as a big ass hog came barreling toward me. I was waiting for the thump when it veered and went past me.

Myles Sanderson, suspect in Sask. stabbing rampage, arrested

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 7, 2022:

That caught my attention as well.

Meet Trump's Special Master

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 9, 2022:

The way the cult works, it could happen.

Judge cannon schooled and warned to reverse her decision for a special master by next Thursday OR ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 9, 2022:

He has no rights to any of the documents, even if there were "executive privilege." They belong to the government and the judge is an idiot sycophant..

Transgender 8th Grade student questioned by Texas officials at school, mother says - The Washington ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 10, 2022:

With no minor's advocate or parent, that sounds highly illegal, but, it is Texass.

I just blocked Focus1. There's no way I want to hear any of his babble again.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 11, 2022:

Not sure what his purpose is, yet. He is an ass.

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Trump's teenager, that thinks she's a lawyer, has lawyered-up.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 11, 2022:

And, she still won't get paid.

Someone asked for more.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 12, 2022:

I remember the time she literally slapped his hand away. He and his whole family are skanks.

Feds Charge Woman Who Threatened the Judge in Mar-a-Lago Records Case

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 13, 2022:

And, she probably figured she did nothing wrong. Hopefully jail time for a felony.

The sisters of eternal agony teach you about sex.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 13, 2022:

The nun one - when I first started teaching, I took a job at a catholic school (hard times, needed experience), and a nun asked me to speak to her marriage class (I was married with 3 little kids). The kids were rather bored and uncaring about my "talk" until I casually mentioned that I had lived with my wife before getting married. Suddenly, a lot of interest and questions. I was Never invited back to speak.

The almond milk of the dairy shelf.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 14, 2022:

Hm, I don't think it is even good enough to be turkey bacon. If a friend served me turkey bacon, I would eat it; if a friend turned on xtion rock, I would tell them to turn it off, or life as they know it will change.

Let's talk about what Trump said about possible indictment.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 15, 2022:

Exactly, anybody else would be locked up. tRump thinks this would be 1968 again. Or, many other turbulent times. I do think there may, quite likely, be some dumbasses doing reckless shit - already happened in Michigan. But riots in the streets, not his base of Walmart shoppers.

It looks like we have some really great people out there. Give yourselves a hand.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 16, 2022:

Damn straight we are

Southern Baptist leader: Christians who don't vote Republican are 'unfaithful'

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 16, 2022:

That is political a d should be an automatic loss of tax exemption.

[cnn.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 20, 2022:

While humorous for the irony, it appears just an asshole CEO who couldn't control his emotions.

According to a 19th century legend, the Truth and the Lie meet one day.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 21, 2022:

Reminds me of a 14th century French take on Little Red Riding Hood - I'll skip to the chase. After being tricked to get naked and into the bed with the wolf, Red escaped and went home. While nothing happened to Red, her parents threw her out onto the streets because of her dishonor (as a female, she should have died rather than shame the family).

Trump is a blithering idiot and he must think his base are idiots. [youtu.be]

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 22, 2022:

They are

Next level of Roe V. Wade...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 23, 2022:

There ready have been lawsuits from kids against their parents saying they didn't ask to be born and must be supported.

I believe whatever that happens In this life happen for a reason because God doesn’t do bad but ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 25, 2022:

I said below that there are no gods. However, I am going to ask you a question. Give me a moment. You say God does no bad. If you are talking about the Abrahanic god, what about ordering the Israelites to wipe out their enemies, kill their babies, and rape their women that they then took as slaves? What about the flood? Yes, the Abrahanic god did say that the people had become wicked and I suppose one could attempt to argue that killing wicked people is ok. However, if it was the entire Earth, some of those people would have been mere children. I don't see how one could argue a baby or small child could be wicked. Care to try? Or, do you have a different god in mind? I'm sure I could find examples of most known religions' gods doing things that most humans would see as morally repugnant.

All you designers out there...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 26, 2022:

Lawnmower lane? Walk-up service? Motor scooter lane? It is a CITGO, headquarters are in Houston, maybe that's a factor.

USA's most expensive property has views of the Earth's curvature

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 26, 2022:

In the 3rd century BCE, they proved the Earth was round. Idiots continue to be idiots.

So Rolling Stone just came out with top100 tv shows of all time.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 27, 2022:

I agree with Glenn. And I haven't seen Sopranos either. There are a lot of shows that are probably good which I haven't seen and that's life.

Again, not funny.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 27, 2022:

Sometimes, Putin seems to think along the lines of Krushev saving Stalingrad in WWII. Except he isn't saving the Mother land, facing an invading army.

I had a music teacher in Jr high that said it was easy to wash his hair, he just took the washcloth ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 27, 2022:

When I was in 6th grade, our art teacher took a trip around the world, thus he was gone for a few months and we had a sub. When he was to return, we were told draw pictures of his adventures so she could hang them up. I honestly thought mine was cute, but it didn't get hung up. In mine, his bald head was prominent as he sat in a tree looking down at a tiger and his safari hat.

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 27, 2022:

You never know what you might hear in a classroom. When I first started teaching, I taught at a catholic high school. I was teaching Milton's Paradise Lost. I was talking about different levels of hell and how different religions have their own versions and levels as well. I mentioned the 7 levels in Islam (from their literary works) and said the lowest level was for hypocrites - those who claimed to be Muslim but didn't act correctly. One student, sitting in the back, his mom was catholic and his dad Muslim, said, "That's where my dad's going." Everyone was silent for a moment, then I moved on.

Yup! Mine also!!!

Beowulfsfriend comments on Sep 29, 2022:

A good, trustworthy mechanic is always nice to find. I used to do a lot of my own repairs - not so much anymore: no place to work on a car; getting old; mostly cars are mechanical things ingrained with tons of high tech. My brother was a licensed mechanic. I had a colleague moving to Tampa and I asked if he wanted a good, trustworthy mechanic who was a bit of an asshole. He said sure; I gave him my brother's place address.