Can’t wait for them to fall!

EricJones comments on Jun 10, 2024:

That second one is wrong-he doesn't have a heart.

It’s the two minutes that gets me…

EricJones comments on Jun 10, 2024:

That's one damn fast exam. That's not enough time to try "kiss it and make it better".

So, what do you think about my new clock?

EricJones comments on Jun 10, 2024:

Some days I don't even go that far. Get up, do all the chores and don't worry about it.

Portrait of a hatemonger.

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

There was an interview on npr last week with one of the behind the scenes people from the apprentice and it was really bad. trump treated women and blacks as scum and called them every vile name he could. He would fire them just because of their gender or skin color and it was all cut out to keep the show on the air.

I like these two…

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

Do they ever apply to what's going on in world politics the last few years.

No battles, just bottles.

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

I love the hole foods store. Somebody has no idea how to write a headline and the proofreader is no better. Corporatecare is the main reason I retired from hospital pharmacy and health care in general.

The rule is simple. Please follow.

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

That can really give you bad yelp reviews.

Nematodes are helpful too.

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

If I can find a nematode solution to a problem, I go for it. Been doing it for years. Happy to see them become more popular over the use of chemical sprays.

Trump introduction by Grand Rapids GQP chairman.... [twitter.com]

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

Did he miss anything? I think he left out glutton. That's quite the laundry list. That should be a political ad on tv, like 10 times a day.

That's a fact!!!

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

And people will tell their bartender more things than they'll their doctor.

This "king" of Queens ain't nobody in Manhattan 😂

EricJones comments on Jun 8, 2024:

But they let him keep the tie. Although given his fat ass (and fat head) it's gonna be hard for anything to withstand that much weight without breaking.

Guess who gets to piss in a cup when he visits his BLACK probation officer?

EricJones comments on Jun 5, 2024:

Now would be a good time to put a poppy seed roll in his daily diet. One for breakfast, a few more poppy seed hamburger rolls with his dinner burgers.

The breakup ended badly…

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2024:

Well, at least we know he's not jewish.

Translation…

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2024:

I think a rough translation is americans are fat.

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2024:

Hi, that's me.

I have an update patriots

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2024:

That's right, I forgot they think the earth is flat.

There was a frantic call recently

EricJones comments on Jun 3, 2024:

I wouldn't want to bet she's had herself sewn shut or has chronic headaches.

Is that acceptable to you? Judge Merchan is thinking.

EricJones comments on Jun 3, 2024:

The game would be how far would he go if you hit him at the speed limit? Awards for- Longest flight time, most bounces and total distance.

All it’s good for…

EricJones comments on Jun 3, 2024:

In many older buildings in Europe-especially public ones- that's what you have-a hole in the floor and you better have good aim. Most have been replaced with modern toilets, but there are still a few here and there.

'Just let me staple the vicar!' British comedian Peter Kay ▪︎ Misheard Lyrics 🤣🤣🤣 ...

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

That was great.

Anyone heard any news about him lately?

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

Bigfoots time has passed. We're too worried about zombies now.

North Korea is changing...

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

I just heard on the news their executions are scheduled for tomorrow.

You can tell early on... experts say

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

The recruiters are getting to them really early these days.

Very important

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

That's one use I never thought of. I wonder if they're going to use it again to aid in delivery.

I am not going to explain this one

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

I think Jim likes squats

My hero... Lol

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

Now she knows how us guys feel.

Are these people wailing and showing signs of derangement outside a New York courthouse displaying a...

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

My call is fanatical cult worship (like catholics at easter) and mental disorder. If these idiots would read a balanced newspaper, balanced news coverage (radio or tv- don't matter), and just think about what he is saying and then fact check him-it just might open their eyes to the fraud and danger to this country and world that he is.

The new Monopoly game seems fun…

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

Don't give him any ideas, he'll try to sell that game to line his pockets with. It's not beneath him to do it.

Zero sorrow, unless he doesn’t get jail time!

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

He doesn't need a taxi-he needs a forklift.

Oops!!! I forgot to post these a couple of days ago! Lol!!!

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

The king of flashy-trashy

The last man I talked with on Fitness Singles. A sexist, lazy user.

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

Your profile put it all out there on the table. Anybody who read it top to bottom should know what you want and where they stand in relation to that. Any guy who thinks otherwise is just plain stupid and needs to be taught humility amongst other things. Not having someone to share the joys of life sometimes is no fun, but having someone in your life who makes you miserable is far worse. You make the best with what you have and if you bump into him on the trail one day, all the better. And love what you did with Paul Simon's lyrics, that was great.

It really is amazing how low they'll stoop.

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

What about the names he called Ted himself during the 2016 primaries?

Part two of the wonderful mining available today

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

I wonder if they're going to make Stormy Daniels birthday a federal holiday?

Explaining it...

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

That family is too stupid to figure that one out.

When assembling your dog, be sure to follow the instructions to avoid disasters like this… 😂

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

Looks like my cats when they're sleeping.

Waa waa🎸.

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

Trump can't put a guitar on his belly because his arms are too short.

They never show you this in the news

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

And on the third helping he arose from the dead and ascended into heaven to sit on the heavenly throne.

No cheese please....

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

That gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "cutting the cheese"

Even better when you finish getting the last corner on and see two lumps under the sheet.

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

I have a twin so it's not too bad. But It's not just the cats, but the dogs too. Can take me half an hour to change the sheets because it's a conga line of animals trying to get on the bed while I'm working.

For some reason, I didn't mind

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

Is that what they call a two for one special?

I cannot say no

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

I don't care what color her hair is, I'll take it. And it's kyrptonite not cyrptonite

It's now settled

EricJones comments on May 31, 2024:

Can I vomit now????

New York opens new library....

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

The only way that tub of lard is gonna get any exercise into his life.

Got to love nature...

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

Did the last owner escape or is that all that's left.

New friend....

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

Looks like my back yard.

It seemed like a fun idea at the time, and I already had the outfit on...

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

My dogs like to dig in my compost pile, but they usually just lay there with their butts sticking out. And they're white as snow. Jeff doesn't quite understand how things work, do he. Although he did send it on april 1, so maybe he does have his oars in the water.

Talk about a half ass job!!!

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

So I guess that the assets were divided evenly after the divorce.

At first I thought it was Samuel Jackson....

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

I don't think she likes trump. And she didn't take the lords name in vain either.

New campaign slogan....

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

Finally, something she's good at.

fuck'em, were making larger cattle

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

A stretch cow-Is that like a stretch limo?

There is always one

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

She could save herself a lot of work if she just dropped the cigarette.

It’s a cartoon but I don’t know if it’s funny🤦🏼‍♀️

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

Doonesbury isn't always ment to be funny as much as it's a social commentary.

First, take a deep, deep breath....

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

Does he have to change safe words every few months and he can't repeat any from the last 50 that he's used?

But covered under the disability act

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

Constipation is a disability? Or does he just have his head up his ass.

Couldn't be more honest

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

A happy marriage does make life a lot more fun.

Our neighborhood update...

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

You mean all the women stopped having headaches.

I'd love to know what happened to him after he said that. 😆

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

Cows may come and cows may go, and I think that one's gone.

In case you needed another reminder Don't pet the fluffy cows.

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

I live in an area with lots of cows; so I know that difference.

Be careful what you wish for

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

Well, at least he has hair on the top of his head again.

Not sure if I’d ask the person wearing this shirt where they got it or slowly back away…

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

I like that poem.

At least some booties. Sheeez,

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

Now days you can't even listen to the phone conversation through the door because everybody is texting

Poor spellers??

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

Between auto-correct and the looming AI field, we may never be able to communicate electronically again

The Dunning-Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which people with low ability at a task tend to ...

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

And these idiots are the ones who yell the loudest because they know everything despite the fact that their logic circuits are totally fried, if they ever existed at all.

So, now you know...

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

He's a baby-probably makes more than he talks.

Dad was doing what was asked of him…

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

Another good old fashion dad joke.

I don’t know what to say.

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

Just a simple little typo and -bang- the beans are really spilled.

Lil donnie is scheduled to speak to the Libertarian convention tonight, I hope they boo him off the ...

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

He wants to get into that chair, he craves the attention-the problem is he can't give simple answers, can't stay on subject, will ramble on and will dig his own grave. His lawyers know this and will keep him out of that chair at all costs.

Ahhhh Saturday afternoon finally I get to relax!!!

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Give the burger king to the enemy. Before you know it they'll be fat and much easier to hit when you shoot at them.

Christian missionaries were killed in Haiti.

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Haiti is almost totally roman catholic. What were these idiots doing there? Didn't they do any kind of research on the country? The side sum up paragraph on wikipedia would have told them that. They would still be alive if they had any brains in their heads.

She must not be his best friend?

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Did he not see the flag after his wife hung it up? And is she that stupid to not know how to hang the american flag the right way? Really???

Too many hamburgers?

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Couch potato culture and the all american diet-drive through take out or home delivery, neither of which are healthy eating.

His love. I got emotional.

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Yup, Sherlock Holmes he ain't.

Sure tastes good...

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Serve it next to a bar--bell

Back to unreality TV.... But made real...

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

At least the other two have chins and don't look stupid as hell

A geography pop quiz

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

mini soda.

Naaaaah, I got it..

EricJones comments on May 24, 2024:

Of course Florida will ban the brothers grimm, and anybody else that doesn't match their agenda. I'm waiting for them to ban Alexandre Dumas because he's black.(actually mixed).

True story!

EricJones comments on May 24, 2024:

The young wish they were old and the old wish they were young.

Don’t let them use this as their excuse.

EricJones comments on May 24, 2024:

If he's doing an exorcism thinking he's gonna get a free burger out of it, he better think again.

That I do. ;)

EricJones comments on May 24, 2024:

Of course I'll read anything about sex, I'll take all the help I can get.

In my book, every day is Friday

EricJones comments on May 24, 2024:

I'm retired-every day is friday., or the weekend; either one fits.

Hmm, maybe that means I can be the scallion of scalawags?

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

There are some falling rock signs around where I live and about 40 years ago somebody put a bumper sticker from a local rock station on the bottom of the signs.

I’ve actually done this…

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

I've not done that yet, but I'm waiting for the day.

Trumpsmellydumpitis? Just a suggestion.

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

He's a case study and a half. There are gonna be whole conferences held to discuss his mental issues.

Sometimes the nicest people you meet are covered in tattoos and piercings and sometimes the most...

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

Oh hell yes. I like to attend some local large music festivals and and fairs and most of the people with body art are some of the most fun and I don't really like body art. And the people wearing crosses are generally the biggest bunch of snobs and assholes.

Yes, he really said it!

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

Who the hell is he kidding??? A walrus is a better physical specimen than he is.

OMCHEEZUSSSS!!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

His ass ain't near that skinny, must be a photo shop.

dementia seems to be a Trump trait

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

Too much blond hair dye fried her only brain cell.

It's been a long ass day!!! 😔🙄😂😂😂

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

Seems like his backup band ain't backing him up.

The unholy trinity

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

Isn't that what people call brainless boobs?

Wives always remind

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

They're gonna be awfully soggy by the time he gets back.

Oh no 🤦‍♂️ what are MAGA tRumpidiots going to do? They are stuck inside the store.

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

As long as those morons are in that store they're contained and isolated from the rest of us.

Plunging into the pun job.

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

I think Betty is just letting her artistic side out. I'd love to see what she can do for the halloween buffet.

With a little luck by the end of next week we will see Republican terrorists back in front of the ...

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

Misery loves company.

The humour is a s black as his clothing

EricJones comments on May 22, 2024:

Wingsuits are only good if you know how to use them.

Good Taco Tuesday Afternoon!!!

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

I think somebody is trying to tell Juan he needs to think about like maybe going on a diet?

Now you, you watch me not care..

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

Prince charmings chances with snow white are gonna be zero if he uses that alarm clock.

Way to go out!!!

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

Florida wants to ban cookbooks with southern fried chicken recipes.

Finally, an arrest

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

They're gonna have to lay him down in the back seat to get him in the car.

Oops!!!! Accidentally 😂 another post!

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

That chainsaw guy needs to pay a visit to the old testicle.

Doctor's orders!!!

EricJones comments on May 19, 2024:

Why do I have this strange urge to turn it on at top apeed.