They are the controls and we know what happens next

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 4, 2021:

........................

Peekaboo , funny

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 4, 2021:

....................

I knew he had been faking it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 4, 2021:

He just has a photographic memory....

Love a guy that stands up for himself

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

https://youtu.be/-3Yjk4TnWwA

Well he asked.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

Dat ass......

Star wars

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

1 Collect the shit in a 5 gallon bucket 2 Add water 3 Stir well 4 wait on the roof for the bastard...

But, god loves you...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

Destination popularity determines infrastructure needs....

All the rage with the QAnon crowd...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

https://youtu.be/urglg3WimHA

Lucy is right

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

Thankfully Floriduh is now over 20,000 new cases a day....

It seems casting for the new Papal glove puppet is underway, shame on them all!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

..................

Could worms be virgins?!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 3, 2021:

When they die they get a herd of 72 goats....

Happens to the best of us

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 2, 2021:

I used to call them "brain farts" until I was diagnosed with PTSD and realized that was one of the symptoms....

A lady always does

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 2, 2021:

If cussing was actually unladylike there would be damned few ladies in the world...

Meow now! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 2, 2021:

At least this one isn't a personal butthurt lawyer....

Mine sure does

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 2, 2021:

I figure any day I am looking at the green side of the grass it is a win....

not today satan!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 2, 2021:

Stupid is as stupid does....

Men cannot be left behind

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Nothing like making a tit out of yourself...

Yup that makes you think

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Hell I think half my high school class is already dead and I am the one who should be already...

Yikes that's a nasty monkey

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Will he still be smiling when that monkey face fucks him?... "Inquiring (but perverted) minds what to know..."

Boy were they wrong

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Looking stupid is just the icing on the cake.... these people make utter morons look like Albert Einstein....

Yup, that's me!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Better yet open it and watch the fur fly when they finally figure out what you said...

Panties

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Not what you were thinking it was just your dirty mind....

Wasn't expecting this....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

And ya done gone and made an ash of yourself now didn't cha?...

That would be awkward

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Because of course they are "Humpback whales..."

okay that's fucking nasty.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Aug 1, 2021:

Just thinking of the sound he made standing up makes me want to hurl...

Just hope 2021 doesn't match it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

And 2021 is gearing up to make 2020 look like paradise...

I found my oasis...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

"I'd buy that for a dollar..." Name that quote...

Yeah I prefer whipped cream too

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

Ought to be interesting to see how they grow keeps us posted on how that works out....

Probably the only one I will get

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

Cost of living vs what companies pay you will be lucky to end up with that much but your boss will likely have a super yacht, a 500 million dollar home and a "vacation cabin worth at least 50 million...

Look like brothers to me

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

....................

Haven't gotten one of these in awhile. Do elder guys really respond to these??? 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

I enjoy outing these scammers...

No bag needed

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

Ask if that was an offer....

Just wait 'til it gets older...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 31, 2021:

...................

U were warned!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 30, 2021:

Why is it these people think that their own pathetic "rights" are far more important than the rights of all those people around them?....

Oh dang! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 29, 2021:

A Pirate's life for me....

Exactly wrong place

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 29, 2021:

I just love posting the bible quotes they hate instead.... They usually end up blocking me so it's all good....

How does it flush? 🤔

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 29, 2021:

Can't even take a shit in peace with Moses around....

The height of irony isn't it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 29, 2021:

....................

I am happy to do it too

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 29, 2021:

Are those C-5As still flying?... I say give em all a free ride to Afghanistan with their weapons and dump em off for the Talaban to take care of...

Helping people makes me happy

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 28, 2021:

Where do I volunteer?....

Will it never end???

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 28, 2021:

......................

Like "Jeez, this guy's grammar is terrible!" 😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 28, 2021:

"Fucking idiot makes no sense at all why does he have my contact info?...."

the person who came up with this deserves a bonus.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 28, 2021:

Hard as steel....

Medieval texting.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 27, 2021:

Looks like we are heading towards this thanks to the billionaire class...

New version...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 27, 2021:

"Keeping with the last post's theme maybe he just needed a little advice.... [youtu.be]"

very smart move.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 27, 2021:

LOL and when they do catch him it is going to really cost...

Different kind of dance

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 27, 2021:

..................

A little dark humor...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

I have four indoor only cats and a yard cat who I love dearly and spend a lot of money caring for yet I still had a chuckle over this.... But if I actually saw someone do this I would have to dispose of a body...

But she's the proof of evolution

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

https://youtu.be/Qkuu0Lwb5EM

Another Gervais...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

....................

I'd do it for the free mask.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

A SAM would have been far cheaper and amused a lot more people if you ask me.... I know I would have found it a barrel full of belly laughs....

They work get yours

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

On the bright side look at all the idiots that are taking themselves out of the gene pool....

Look at the other dog lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

Are you sure it is his nipples he is thinking of?....

Are you thoughtful in buying gifts?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

Suburban camouflage...

Which, unfortunately, isn't all that common...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

We can see...

My friend had too many beers

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 26, 2021:

So my guess is your friend has never been married and is probably a 60+ year old virgin besides?...

Proud Papa,,,,

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 25, 2021:

Did I just hear banjo music?.....

Did I say it right?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 25, 2021:

Best thing you could ask for on any online dating site....

Following the dalai llama or the Wooly Savior?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

Sounds like the majority if the human race... Sheeple following their version of a prophet...

Marjorie Taylor Greene won’t say if she’s been vaccinated.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

My guess is she refused the rabies vaccine saying it would mutate her into a human being...

Employers are now asking, “who won the 2020 election” in interviews to weed out the crazies.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

We should pass a federal law preventing domestic terrorists from holding any position in government even as a contractor... Then declare all Trump's followers the domestic terrorists that they are... No buy, no fly, and no government funding...

Sounds like a plan

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

Or better yet a nice Muslim boy....

In a nutshell , that's MAGA

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

.................

He'd give you two thumbs up, but, well...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

https://youtu.be/1ihy2cP2ilE

I thought it was Satan planting the fossils???

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

Is this what is known as a Q-theory?....

Getting ready for a hot wax...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 24, 2021:

Probably the shit between his ears.... The best thing about being bald is you don't need a comb, brush, hair dryer or barber....

Definitely need instructions , if MAGA can't read anyway

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

........................

Will they bake or cremate ?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

My guess is he didn't rise to the occasion....

That I knew lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

I found the best way to reprimand kids in the store was when they start acting up I just look at someone who looks offended nearby and say.... "neighbors kid(s)..."

Yeah can be obsessive about it

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

My sister is always insulted because I keep telling her she makes shit coffee... When you drink a 50/50 mix of that sludge they sell in the stores as "creamer" you don't know what coffee is supposed to taste like....

I am sure it would

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

It would help me lose weight though because I despise grapefruit....

A good argument for tighter firearm restrictions? :-D

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

More even better reasons...

Oh O!!!! Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

What is his stage name "Hung Harry" or "Big Peter?"

Yes he did

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

Not that it takes much effort to destroy Rand Paul he is even more of a stupid bigot than his father was....

That sounds like Walmart

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

What do you say to compliment a Redneck beauty queen?... Nice tooth....

Yup try that

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

https://vimeo.com/577902405

Don't throw your toys.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

Poor cat is looking like "pick up your toys already I need a place to take a nap..." Open up a used toy store and that person could retire...

In Portuguese vaccine is spelled vacina, this is quite the Typo for national TV! :-D

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

Maybe if we put up signs outside vaccination clinics saying "Free Vagina" more people would get vaccinated....

Close enough.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 23, 2021:

Funny isn't it how those least likely to take these jobs are the ones who want to build a wasteful wall to keep these people out... And of course won't do what they think it will...

You have to make your own rhythm.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 22, 2021:

How cold....

DDT is so safe, you can sprinkle it on your cornflakes. [youtu.be]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 22, 2021:

Win with Darwin....

A busy road

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 22, 2021:

You can always tell who the workers is.... he is the guy who has the shovel he leans on all day....

Are you a nightmare dinner guest? I scored zero. 😁

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 22, 2021:

14 some for dietary and food safety reasons (I avoid fish because much of it is contaminated anymore) Nutella I avoid all products of that company because they are one of the largest supporters of child slavery in the world.

R U Qualified???

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 22, 2021:

States should require corporations that do this to give a 5% discount on items bought in those lanes....

"And the next day the miracle occurred - crucifixion, resurrection, and he rose again from the dead ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 21, 2021:

https://youtu.be/PXeSgVk5aH4

Teal life terminator

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 21, 2021:

Proctologist... because he is a pain in the ass....

(Cartoonist Serge Chapeleau, La Presse, Montreal)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 21, 2021:

Too bad it didn't leave a hole in the ground when he landed...

That scares them lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2021:

................

HR, do you care about your valued emloyees?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2021:

I would enjoy helping her with that....

Cheaper than therapy.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2021:

Therapy shouldn't be expensive. It is always easier to work out your problems when you actually know what they are...

Dad joke alert! Just treading along, tired but thinking it's been a Goodyear so far. 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2021:

365 used rubbers is a very good year....

Back in the day...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 20, 2021:

We put together a fun cart frame with a 25HP engine... The kid who was clocking us backed off at 60 MPH while it was still accelerating...

&, honestly, all the religion stories sound silly as hell...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 19, 2021:

As well as boringly repetitious....

But I won't do that...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 19, 2021:

*Vomits profusely*

It's my theory most religions are invented BS...(ok, all of them)

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 19, 2021:

If you consider each religion as an individual case they you do have a series of facts that make a valid theory...

She told me too

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 19, 2021:

Groceries?....

Who needs exercise or steroids !

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2021:

The scourge of online dating...

No high hopes here

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2021:

GQP campaign sign?....

Eyes on the prize

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2021:

Only real problem there is vision care....

Not ordering from that Chinese restaurant again

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2021:

https://youtu.be/Z8zEfYbsrr0