99.9% sure

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 29, 2018:

I'm open to new information that may change my opinion.

Staying together for the kids 2.0

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 29, 2018:

My divorce was the best thing I ever did for my son and myself.

How many of you would CHOOSE to live alone if you had the financial means?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 29, 2018:

I've lived alone for almost 6 years. It's wonderful. I don't think I could live with another person ever again.

Forced into going to church as a child

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 28, 2018:

My mom decided she needed religion to quit being a mean person, so everyone else had to go with her. It was horrible. Most of the people were nice but completely full of shit. I knew they were feeding me a line of bull at 8. I actually lost a lot of respect for my parents for buying into what I considered stupidity.

How many of your friends know you are atheist or agnostic?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 28, 2018:

If they don't know, they haven't been paying attention.

What Kind of Trump Supporter Are YOU??

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 26, 2018:

Can't stand him but he's infinitely better than Mike Pence. You can always trust Trump to act in his own best interest. Pence would destroy himself just to make a point.

Do you believe American medicine was designed to help humans heal or are we making/keeping people ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 26, 2018:

Treat symptoms but maintain illness to maximize profits.

Here in Iowa they are voting to put the Bible in our schools as a class.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 26, 2018:

I don't have a problem as long as it is taught as historical fiction. Reading the bible is more common among atheists than believers.

Is it more important to be liked or respected?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 26, 2018:

Respected...I don't care if anyone likes me or not. Chances are I don't like them anyway.

Piercings? Yea or Nay?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 26, 2018:

The only piercing that bothers me in the tongue because I'm a speech pathologist and it distorts speech.

How often do you pay attention to your neighbors?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

I only know one of my neighbors. I exchange hellos but really have no interest in knowing anything about them.

Is it OK to live by yourself, have friends and relationships, but nothing moving towards marriage or...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

I've never been particularly interested in maintaining relationships and have refused to compromise my wants and desires since my son turned 18. I'm perfectly happy in my quiet home with my cat.

What's your preferred dwelling type?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

I love my apartment. I've always had difficulty with the idea of any type of long term commitment (>5 years). I like the yearly option of walking away free and clear.

Best thing about sex besides an orgasm ?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

Personally, not having it.

What age should be the age of legal consent for sex?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

I lean toward 15 with no more than 3 years difference until the younger person reaches 18.

Did your parent(s) ever talk to you about 'da birds & da bees'?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

My parents never talked to me. I kept on open dialog with my son from the time he was little on every topic under the sun.

What is the 1 factor discouraging women from pursuing technology/engineering related degrees?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

Boredom...actually I chose my career based on the person who had the largest impact on my family, my son's first SLP when he was a toddler. I wanted to give to parents what she had given me.

If you graduated college, did you feel lost and nervous, unsure of what your future would hold and ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 25, 2018:

I had a job in my field before I graduated but had to wait 3 months for my licensing and background checks to go through.

How many of us still celebrate Christmas?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I haven't celebrated Christmas since I moved out of my parents' house at 18.

When should anatomy/health/sex education be introduced into a child’s life?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

From birth. My son learned at an early age not to ask a question if he didn't want to know the answer. Nothing was ever off limits. When it comes to sex if you can't have an adult conversation about sex you have no business having it.

Presumed to be religious.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

Luckily, I work Thursday-Sunday 8:00 am to 7:30 pm so I obviously do not attend church.

What Did You Do So Far?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I've done 5 of them. And my mom thought I was a problem child.

Age. Does it come to one defining moment when you realize you have gotten older?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I don't feel any older, but my baby is pushing 30 so I must be getting old.

Women, it's your body so why should you have to?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

For a termination... If you're in a relationship, I believe the man should be informed and offer an opinion that is taken into consideration but his permission is not relevant. If it was a simple accident during a casual sexual encounter, do what you want. If adoption is your choice, he should be offered the chance to raise the child himself. The woman would not owe him child support and would give up all parental rights.

What do you have faith in?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I believe the only person I can count on to take care of me is me. My most valued quality in anyone is independence.

What political party do you consider yourself to be?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I'm registered Democrat but my individual beliefs are kinda all over the place. I would never support an anti-choice candidate - that's my one non-negotiable.

Does asking a co worker for a date list as a sexual harassment

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

It's not against HR rules at work when 2 employee are on equal footing; however, it is strongly discouraged. Personally, I keep work and personal life completely separate. I have people I consider work friends in that we're friendly within the work setting but never socialize outside of the work setting.

When do you find sex the most enjoyable?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

Never. It's better when there is a deep emotional connection, but I can't say I've ever really enjoyed sex.

How many people like telling people your anti religious and how many people keep it a secret? Why?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

The only time it really comes up is at work whenever there is a holiday coming up. I always ask my kids if they celebrate the holiday if there is a craft or seasonal activity. They often ask me if I celebrate or go to church. My policy is to be as honest as the kiddo is able to understand. In my experience, people who have grown up with religion are very live and let live. The militant believers have usually converted after having done something they're ashamed of and need to believe that they've only gotten forgiveness and a clean slate due to their acceptance of an all powerful Jesus Christ.

Hey, non-believers. Has anyone here ever lied about a religious affiliation to get a perk?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I lied to my mom and grandma for years. I didn't want to hurt my medically fragile grandma and didn't want to listen to my mother's whining "How could you do this to ME?!"

What was your worst experience with religious people?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I've never had a bad experience with religious people. In my experience, they haven't been unkind just misguided. Generally, I just roll my eyes at them.

What Have Your Relationships Taught You?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

That I honestly don't really like many people and would rather be alone. Once my son was an adult, I decided I was never going to do anything that I don't want to do just to make another person happy.

Boyfriend is agnostic, I'm an atheist. How to cope with disagreements?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

If this is bothering you now, I'd avoid marriage and/or children with him at all costs. It isn't going to get any easier. Belief or non-belief isn't the issue really. It's honestly about his unwillingness to actually research and develop an opinion of his own.

Question from a newbie to this forum, but not a newbie Atheist.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I don't honestly connect religious people with a belief in god because what they really done is attached themselves to the system of rules created by men that they feel most comfortable following. Spiritual but not religious kind of in my mind implies a rejection of religion but hope for a 'higher power'. Each person has to define and create their own belief system.

Do you celebrate religious holidays?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I don't celebrate any holidays except birthdays. If I'm invited to a friends house, I'll go and bring a gift for the children because they do celebrate.

What would be the definition of hell to you?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

Reincarnation with awareness. Or waking up married with 2 kids and a third on the way.

Parents! How do you deal with grandparents who try to influence your children with religion?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

It was never an issue. He was taught that religion is an opinion and to form his own. To this day I honestly don't know what my son's actual religious beliefs are. He would most likely refer to himself as Christian but he doesn't attend church ever.

One of the things I really dislike about organized religion is the way parents tend to indoctrinate ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I exposed my son to different cultures, religions and beliefs. I wanted him to grow up valuing our differences. Take the good and incorporate into his life and work to change the harmful aspects.

I am Secular Pro-Life. Here are my secular arguments to which I'd like you to respond.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

I'm pro-choice. I support safe abortion on-demand. Why a woman chooses to get an abortion is absolutely no one's business but her own. I have ended a pregnancy and I have to say that it was an easy decision that I have never regretted.

Why do we need feminism?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 24, 2018:

Because up until a few years ago I couldn't get a salesperson, male or female, to wait on me at an electronics store or car lot without the presence of a man and I make a whole lot more money than all the men in my life put together.

Religious people attracted to agnostics/atheists? Why?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

The bonus points they getting for "saving" the lost sinner.

What Advice Or Support Would You Give A Friend Or Family Member Facing Death?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Let them feel whatever they're feeling without judgment. Ask them what they need instead of assuming I know. Provide a shoulder, tissues, funny movies and ice cream

Death Penalty?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

No, killing someone is always wrong.

"In religion and politics people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Too many people are afraid to accept that their parents were full of crap and had no idea what they were doing.

How many people have still not worked out why Hillary lost?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

People would rather believe a comfortable lie than a hard truth.

Are you Bilingual/Trilingual/Etc.?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I only speak English but would love to learn Spanish. Not knowing another language has been a roadblock in my career.

I recently asked a question about the morality of using gene therapy to correct diseases in the ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Just because they can, doesn't mean they should. They problem with medical science is that there is a huge difference between surviving and living. Many adults and children survive illnesses and accidents but will never have a life.

If you knew you were going to die one year from today, what would you do and how would you want to ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't think I'd change anything. I might take more time off work.

If you found yourself standing on Judgement day, what would you have to say to God?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

How the hell did I get here?!?!

How many Careers have you had?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

1. stay at home wife and mother for 10 years 2. SLP for 14 years

Did you ever have a job that sucked the life out of you?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I worked for a boss who sucked all my joy out of the final 6 months my chosen career in a school district. I quit, found a new job and haven't looked back once.

Public meetings and prayers

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Wasted time that would be better spent addressing problems. I feel the same way about the ridiculous teambuilding exercises at work meetings. My time is too valuable for all that BS.

Do you feel it is necessary to be anti religious groups of people to be agnostic or atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I'm anti-religion as a whole due to education and personal experience, but I don't consider my self anti-name your religious leaning.

What do you consider cheating?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Any relationship outside the main relationship that involves lying. If you're not doing anything wrong, there's no reason to lie.

Polyamory

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I've been interested in polyamory for a long time. I've always kinda thought my perfect relationship would be a bisexual boyfriend with a gay boyfriend. That way I could provide emotional support and companionship to both without feeling obligated to have sex with anyone. yes, I'm aware of how selfish that is.

Marriage vs. long term relationship: what is everyone's preference?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I can't think of a single benefit of marriage.

There are good people and there are evil people but the only thing that can make a good person an ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't believe in evil. Everyone is capable of doing good or bad. The choices you make define you as a person.

Is it possible for a believer and a non-believer to be compatible in a long term relationship?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

It's a matter of respect. Sure, it's possible. I'd think children could very easily be a breaking point. I could never tolerate someone teaching their opinion as fact to my child. I was very clear that I don't 'believe' in god or jesus but that other people do.

Do you ever miss the religious life?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I miss the routine sometimes. There were times I wanted to buy-in but just couldn't bring myself to mean it when I said it.

Should euthanasia or "death with dignity" be available to anyone upon demand under controlled ...

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Every person has the right to decide to end their life without interference.

Since the statement keeps showing up, among some people even on this site.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Trump is a direct result to a black man getting more power than white people* were prepared to allow or tolerate. I honestly have no problem with people who came into this country illegally as adults being deported; however, children who were brought here by their parents should be made citizens if they desire. *Obviously not all white people but more than enough.

Are you more open and honest online than in person?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I'm the same in all situations.

Should a man be allowed to force a woman to carry his child?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

A man shouldn't be able to make a woman carry a pregnancy she doesn't want to term. I also believe that a man doesn't owe a penny to a woman who chooses to have a child he doesn't want. He should be able to sign away his rights and walk away without looking back.

What do you tell very young children when they ask if you believe in God?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

My niece asked me if Jeebus was real. I told her that some people believe in god and jesus, but I didn't. She told me, "I don't either. Jeebus is fake."

Have you ever been told "you got lucky" when talking about your children?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I tell them "It wasn't luck. I was a damn good mother."

Is a president to be revered or challenged? Read the full question before replying.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I go for challenged because authority should always be challenged. They should always have a justifiable explanation for all choices and actions. I also pity them because they were stupid enough to get themselves a thankless job that no one in their right mind would take.

On English tv.

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't believe in torturing a small child because his parents are unable to accept the reality of his situation.

What if you are wrong and there IS a god

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

According to the church rules, I grew up with it wouldn't matter. I was baptized, so I'm getting in. If they're wrong, I'm going to hell. I can live with that.

If necessary to testify in court would you put your hand on the bible?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Sure, they've just given me permission to lie.

Was there a school teacher who made the most impact in your education?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

In 7th grade, I lost all respect for teachers. I had a science teacher stand up in front of class and say, "I'm a Christian but have to teach you evolution." At that point, I realized that teachers can be stupid and this person had nothing to teach me that I needed to learn.

If you could go back and offer your younger self a piece of advice, what would it be ?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Quit going along to get along. No one else cares.

Do you think atheists are safe ?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I'd lie to save my life. I did it before my grandma died to avoid upsetting her.

Should religion be taught in schools?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Yes, because knowledge is power and ignorance threatens everyone.

Why should we respect religion, when they don't respect atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't respect anyone's religious beliefs, but I do respect their right to have religious beliefs - however stupid I think they are.

Do you openly tell your co-workers you're non-religious?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't bring it up but when they talk religion I simply tell them "I escaped years ago."

Did you let your children go to religious activities with their friends?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I let him go if he asked to attend. I attended church regularly throughout my childhood and adult life and never bought what they were selling. He deserved the same chance to form his own opinion.

When did you first doubt religion?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

My mom dragged me to church at around 8-9 years old. It never made any sense to me, but I didn't have a choice. Once I was older, mom bribed me with steak dinners. I was never a believer but as long as I got something out of it, I was willing to attend.

What was a disillusionment in your life?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Finding out people that I had always loved and admired were bigoted assholes with the election of President Obama. Fox News rots the brain. With marriage equality, I found out they were also homophobic assholes. Now, I also know they are xenophobic assholes. Turns out I grew up surrounded by assholes and just didn't know it.

Why do you reject the idea of religion?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

Religion is just a list of rules created by a group of powerful people to control powerless people. If gods do exist, I'm certain that they'd have nothing to do with religion.

How to deal with religious family and friends?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I just stay outside the group when they say the blessing at dinner. If confronted in any way I just tell them "I believe in religious equality because they're all bullshit."

Should public nudity be legal?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I have no moral objections to nudity. I just don't want to see ANYONE naked.

What is the non-theist replacement for "I'll pray for you?"

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

"I'm so sorry. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help." I'm lousy at emotional support but always happy to cook a dinner or clean a house.

Should I attend a wedding at church as an atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

IMO, you're being silly. Principles are great until they start to negatively affect the important relationships in your life. Even if your daughter is fine with your actions sooner or later it will become an issue in her relationship with her in-laws which will in turn most likely become an issue in her marriage...that will end up as tension in your relationship with her. Go to the wedding and celebrate your daughters wedding as a proud parent.

are you afraid of death?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't look forward to the process of dying, but I have no fear of death. I hope that I'm cognitively and physically able to choose when the time has come.

For atheists - what makes you believe no deity exists?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

For the same reason I don't believe in vampires, werewolves, trolls, fairies or unicorns, there's no proof. If they existed, someone would have seen one by now.

How do you deal with Door-knockers?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I tell them "I grew up in the church. That's where I learned that there is no god. It's been nice talking to you. Have a nice day. Bye" I'm never rude, especially to the children on a Mormon mission. They have been brainwashed their entire lives. They don't know any better.

Why do you think majority of people still believe in God?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I don't think that most people who claim to be religious actually believe. Most people are really just hedging their bets. Their main argument for god existing is usually "What if you're wrong?"

What is your response when people threaten you with religious punishments? (i.e. Hell/Jahannam)

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I'd rather be in hell than in heaven with religious people.

What moral code do you follow now that you are non-religious?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I've always had the same moral code. Mind my own business and never intentionally hurt another being. If you hurt someone, apologize.

How do you tell religious people that you're an atheist?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I tell them "I wasted time in church every Sunday because afterward my mom would take me and my son out for a steak dinner and dessert. I never turn down a free meal." I feel that pretty much makes my point.

As an atheist or agnostic, how do you deal with grief?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I get sad, cry and wallow for about 48-72 hours then move on. Sounds cold, I know. But we're born, we live then we die. I see no reason to spend a lot of time worrying about or regretting things that I can't do anything about. I was upset with doctors and the world (politicians) for a while after seeing how easy I was able to give my cat the release from his misery after having to watch my mother die slowly in tremendous pain. I should have been able to do for my mom what I did for my cat. I did feel a lot of anger when I heard 'we know where she is now' or 'at least he's in a better place'.

Are you an open or closet agnostic/atheist, and why?

PhoebeCat comments on Jan 23, 2018:

I'm an open atheist with my family and friends. Generally, I respond by letting people know I'm an atheist when they start justifying their bigotry using "The bible says..." I let them know that I believe all religions are equally foolish.