I'm drawing a blank.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 27, 2018:

I am the KING of procrastination! Usually I am slightly faster than my ex girl. Cannot leap buildings, regardless of how many tires given... Then crunch time kicks in. I'm 5X as fast as a speeding bullett, can leap two buildings with a single bound. Superman couldn't keep up with me!

Hello, have a rant, well maybe not a rant exactly.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 27, 2018:

Someone who is VERY desperate for money. I bet his crack dealer gave him $5 for barter. Yeah a three wheel bicycle is so highly sought after...

...and too much time on their hands.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 27, 2018:

HEY NOW! I just turned 6 and a HALF! The half counts! Yeah I am rarely on FB anymore. At least on here (for the most part) we are civil, and talk about adult stuff. No, not porn...

Home alone..

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 27, 2018:

Call up Tyson (or any processor of chicken), and ask how much cock meat is in their chicken tenders. :P

Bigger than the Bermuda Triangle

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 27, 2018:

Almost all my friends have kids. It turns out they loose their social life as well. At least for about 20 years...

A few years back I was travelling from Pennsylvania to California I was a solo traveler stopping ...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I agree with you. One time I was at a bar. Someone I vaguely knew was there. He bet one his buddies (who I never saw or knew) $2 that he wouldn't walk up to me and grab my ass. Yes TWO dollars. I told the guy to knock it off. Later that night he did it again! I yelled at him, and one of the bar owners wanted to kick me out. I told him what happened. Never did get kicked out. Saw him for the third time later. Same bar. We were outside having a smoke. I told him to never do that again. Keep in mind this is the second time I met the guy. He said "this is what I do to my friends". Grabbed my ass for the third time. He was on the ground in about a second. Was I in the wrong? What would have happened if I walked up to a random girl and did the same? Don't let me come off as a badass or something. I think the fucker deserved it.

PROOF THAT TRUMP IS A HERO One of my FB friends is a yuge pro-Trumper and evangelical.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

As much a I dislike the guy this is 100% true! Look at the upper left. He even left his golf bag behind! - Fox news

I don't think it says what you mean.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Seems legit.

I really want some Starbucks!

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

How many cups of overpriced coffiee does one have to buy for that perk? Asking for a friend...

Goodnight Kitty:

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Call kitty EMT! I think he/she might have overdosed on catnip!

Working conditions.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Check out indeed.com. I had two job interviews that they hired me on the spot. One they called me. I NEVER filled an app in for them. The second was a very short interview. One page app. The interview didn't last 30 seconds. He skimmed over it for a few seconds. Then asked when was the last time I got into a fight at work. He was meaning fist fight. Second (and last) question was if I could pass a drug test. I said yes. After the two questions he told a manager to show me around and when I could start. He said if I'm dumb enough to work for him, he's dumb enough to hire me. WTF? A GOOD job will give you a lenghy interview. A second or third may be required. Lots of times when they offer you a job that fast, it's a shit job no one wants to do. Going to get my second degree. Not gonna take a grunt work, crappy, barely-above-min-wage job.

Drove past and saw my ex got into a wreck. Hope she's OK.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I ran into my ex the other day. The police are still looking for me...

It's all uphill

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

True.

Looking shocked.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

The one in the back is just glad he turned down the job as a stunt double. lol

Thanks to Americans United for Separation of Church and State, I'm now aware of Tuition Tax Credits,...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Great. Why can't I deduct my fucking medical bills? Lot more bullshit.

Genius idea.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Meh, I can hardly eat bacon anymore. I'd opt for turkey bacon instead. Know who was smarter? The guy that decided to put a hole in the bottom of a popcorn bucket at the movie theater. lol The guy almost always wins. Unless if Pee Wee is sitting by you and offers you some popcorn...

One way to handle a kitten ?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Look! There is a tiny cat under that much bigger cat! I see it! Cute little furry fuckers.

Do I have free will?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

If you need to ask the question, then you don't have it. A choice is made of free will.

I'm restless for no good reason.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I've been dealing with that type of emotion on a daily basis for over a decade.

You think your job sucks?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

What's even worse is if you are a straight guy, and the company asks you to review their product. Or quality control.

Poor spelling offends me, well not really.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

The person that put the note on there might be able to read, but not "wright".

Scotty Don't Beam Me Up Yet!

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Saw it before still funny. Speaking of toilet humor, the funniest vandalism I saw was on a dispenser for ass gaskets. It said "free mexican party hats". lol OT I do know a guy that has gotten hooked up by calling a number from a bathroom stall. No joke.

Prayer really works

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

Sad. The first two are first world problems.

Me when people say the eyes are the window to your soul . . . .

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

You take LSD?

He's not wrong.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

LMAO! On some forums that word is banned.

Your New Boyfriend/Girlfriend.......

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

That kind of control freak also probably wants the password to your phone, your computer, Fb, etc. Not no but fuck no! I can talk to whoever the fuck I want! I had a friend that did that. He'd tell me to delete certian people on my FB. I eventually got sick of him bitching, so I did. He's always ask his GF who she was texting or messaging. Some people have no trust.

ABC 30 IS SILENT Trump was laughed at in the UN when he made a point of him and his ...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-3FyvZTIuU

Next time someone asks you how slept, answer: "Like god during the holocaust".

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I'd steal that, but I have insomnia...

What a crook

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

What happened to blessed are the poor?

A few hours early, but better early than late

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

LOL. On a side note a friend of mine made a rant on FB not that long ago. He clocked in literally 1-2 minutes early for work. He got written up for it! That's funny. On a tangent about just above/below the limit, one of my old room mates got a speeding ticket for doing like 62 in a 60. It wasn't a construction zone, and the weather was not bad (You can get a speeding ticket for going under the speed limit if weather is bad). Funniest part is this guy was one of the most law abiding citizens, and almost always drove a few miles under the limit. That's what's funny!

Nasty divorce

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I remember reading an article a while ago about a guy I think in Germany that's ex wife was granted half of everything. He literally cut almost everything in half. Including the car! That picture was classic.

This has got my attention.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

If they aren't a felon, and legally purchase it, why the fuck can't they have one!? Are they going to take guns from athiests next? Because they eat babies and shit? lol I know people that are in Hells Angles, and South Omaha Boys. Only one is violent. But he can't own a firearm because he is a felon. This will start fights because he just likes fighting. Yeah that guy snaps easy.

That's what I got :)

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

When I was young, I'd get $1 a week. When I was a little older, and would fix fence, do roofing etc, I'd get $5/hr. As a youngster without a license, you take it. Took forever to buy a video game.

Jesús take the wheel

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

I love how he put at the bottom where it says that in the bible. Now I remember where it said that! Fuck my regular GPS will flat out lie to me. Could you imagine the jesus version? Instead of agreeing to not fuck with it while driving, it's say "Do you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior"? Then you have to click on accept, and get some shitty bible quote.

And the whole world started laughing

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 26, 2018:

No, only 99% of the world laughed. Yeah his "accomplishments" are far better than Norman Borlog's. Most people have never heard of him, but it's estimated that he saved over a BILLION peoples lives.

Is she a screamer

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Female humans can scream when they are mad, and you can hear them from mars.

If there is a country left whenever Trump and Trumpists fall from power, we're going to be in a ...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Well, we'd be stuck with Pence. If the Russian thing is true, his whole cabnit will be thrown out. We'd be stuck with the speaker of the house...

I am 81 years old and have been searching for a loved one.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

81 with a sex drive, and knows how to use the internet? We better capture you, and study. My dad is 72, and he literally does not know how to turn on a computer!

If you go fishing do you bait the hook?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

You have to bait a hook to get some fish from the grocery store? I'm confused.

How does one fight this?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

I was working for Chrysler when they went bankrupt. 99% blamed it on Obama. Didn't have shit to do with him. That was Juniors deal that went into effect under the Obama Admin.

Human bait needed.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Sounds like a good deal.

Let me know! Haha

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Take trump with you and make sure he stays there. Also, if you talk to satan, tell him I want my damn guitar back.

No Soliciting

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

The "No Soliciting" signs I bought at Menards for $0.99 each (plus tax), is one of the best ~$2 I ever spent!

Fat Alberts gets 3 to 10 years.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Trump/cosby 2020? Trump is the joke. Cosby could tell the jokes.

Okay, so Cosby has been sentenced to at least three, and no more than ten years.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

There is a possibility that he could get off in as little as 18 months. I had a friend that was sentenced to 6 years in prison for something similar. She admitted in court that she lied about her age. The County Attorney still prosocuted the guy because this is a no fault state. He ended up spending 3 years in prison. Good behaviour.

What simple thing bothers you the most in this current society?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Jeebus, do you really want to read a novel?

Are you waiting on the edge of your seat to see how our president will embarass our country and make...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

He does. Ever read his Twitter? I remember that one time (all the time) Obama posted stupid shit on twitter at 3AM. Oh wait...

...Batman...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Probably had to do that because he was scared about being sued for copyright likeness. lol

What do you say to people who say you can’t have morals without god?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

I'd quote Penn. He was once asked without religion what prevents him from raping and killing all he wanted. His reply was "I rape and kill all I want. The answer is 0". You could quote Tom Araya (who is a catholic). He said "everybody knows the the difference between right and wrong. Unless there is something wrong in here or in here (points to heart, then points to head).

What do they mean the tax cuts for corporations are permanent?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Sweet! That means the other 99% will be stuck for all eternity paying more of a percentage of their much lower paying job to pull for them. Reminds me of the Civil War. Most people think it was all about slavery. That wasn't the main issue. The South had little/no overhead for labor, and were pulling for the North. We've over come this "unearned privlage" before. We can do it again.

A funny thing happened on a dating site I used to belong to.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Was this someone you were talking to previously, or just out of the blue? I would have said something like "No, you're fucked. Look outside your window.". lol Sometimes ya just gotta fuck with them back. Most times I don't care tho.

what do you want to have happen to your body when you die?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

Viking funeral.

Yeah guys.. what’s the problem?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 25, 2018:

I smile like a killer! Just creeps people out tho...

I bet on Farmers.com they do.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

Plowing a field is as popular as having one pulled by a horse. Almost everything is no-till. Just saying.

Check for Alzheimer's

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

Dog!

Been travelling from East ro west for three weeks now.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

I'm not a medical doctor, so I don't know for sure. When I'm in high altitudes I get vertigo. Got that a couple of times when I lived in Phoenix too.

I love Autumn Man! [theonion.com]

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

Is Autumn Man Aqua Man's brother. Is he the arch enemy of Summer Man and Winter Woman?

[youtu.be] already posted skeletons of society and was peer pressured into this, but it is awesome

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

SLAYERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! Favorite band since I was 13. Saw them 7 times. I wish I could have made it to Jeff's memorial.

I love it when the CNN liars get shocked... [americanlookout.com]

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

I love it when Fox calls trump a liar.

Hello! I am Philip! I am a newbie on this website! I am hoping to meet a lot of cool people and make...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

Welcome to this crew!

So, this is why I joined this dating site

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

I've met nothing but creeps and wierdos on online dating sites. Except one. She had severe self-esteem issues. One was a stalker. Why in the hell am I trying it again? Then again, I've met some real "winners" IRL.

I can feel my retinas peeling

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

GMILFS Gone Wild? I bet that's a hot seller...

Who shaved the pussy

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

Saw that pic before but still funny. I bet that cat was pissed! Speaking of never drinking with assholes again... When I lived in Phoenix I was 20 and in trade school. I lived about 10 minutes from ASU East. We had loads of big parties. One morning one of my roomies woke me up and told me to look at Big Mike (called him that because he was tall). His face was covered in sharpie! He obviously saw what was on his face and washed it off. It was a weekend so we didn't have school. He did have to work that day tho. He came over after work. I noticed that he had a sharpie penis on the back of his neck! HE WAS WALKING AROUND WITH IT ON HIS NECK ALL DAY! lol

The Beatles - Let It Be [youtu.be]

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

I have the album Let It Be on vinyl. Not an original, but a repress. Still I have it.

I’d like to buy an “i” please

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 24, 2018:

"People that annoy you". N_ggers. "Oh naggers". Sorry but that was funny.

What is one fun thing you did today?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Nothing. Had to listen to my parents bitch all day. The best part that would be "fun" is getting my ass back to my house so I didn't have to listen to them.

Trump now wants to not give green cards to legal immigrants who use any kind of public assistance.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I completely agree! We need to cut subsidies for LEGAL immigrants! How else are we gonna pay for his golf trips, and vaccations to mar-a-lago? Pffff.

Are tattoos an issue when meeting someone new?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I'm a sucker for girls with full sleeves. Cool ones anyways. I don't have any, nor do I really want one. If I get one it'll be the spider web on my left elbow...

Anyone recovering from alcoholism.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Don't look into something like AA. It is faith-based, and you have about the same chance of quitting as if you go cold turkey. I've had friends that have gotten really bad. One quit because he was given epicak. Another quit because he got on pills. They were $1000 a piece! I've heard that drinking apple juice supresses the want for alcohol. I've heard the same about sweets. Benadryl might help with withdrawls. I'd talk to a doctor. If you drink reguarly, ask your doctor if it's okay to stop abruptly. He/she will tell you why.

Why don’t victims of rape report?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Because most probably feel dirty or ashamed. I myself was the victim of sexual assault many times when I was young. It took me about 20 years before I told anyone.

What have you eaten while not realizing what it was until afterwards?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Several years ago Dad, Mom, Sis and I went to a fancier restraunt in Omaha. I was hungry and we were all chowing down. I ordered a mushroom burger. Half way through it I said "something is weird". My sister said it's probably just mushroom. I looked under the bun. Two big ass mushroom patties! NO BEEF! It felt like I was chewing on rubber. The waitress offered to get me something else. I don't think I ate for about a day! My mom was in France once. She doesn't know any French. She went to a restruant, and nobody spoke English. So she just pointed at what others were eating which looked like a hamburger. It actually was. However it was served with a raw egg on top! YUCK!

The price is high

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Literally made me laugh!

How does this kind of stupidity get elected?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

If any of these were raped, I bet you'd hear something very different.

What if a God was proven real. Would you worship that god?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I've already committed the Cardnial Sin. Be point less, and he doesn't give a shit anyways.

My fellow Texans, how do y'all feel about Ted Cruz saying that school shootings happen because we ...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Shootings happen at churches. Endgame.

The Beatles - A Day in the Life (Remastered 2009 - from The Beatles 1967-1970) [youtu.be]

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I read an article a while ago saying that Lennon started writing the lyrics on a paper napkin at some cafe. It went up for auction, and brought ungodly amount of money. Then again anything Lennon touched is worth a fortune. I know it was a Lennon/McCartney song. I can't find a link tho. Here is a similar one. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/lennons-a-day-in-the-life-lyrics-sell-for-1-2-million-245561/

Why do we not have a right to die?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Because it's usually a perminent solution for a temporary problem. You're leaving your friends and family to deal with the pain for the rest of their lives. Don't be so selfish.

The Beatles - Please Please Me [youtu.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

You'd never guess by just looking at me, but I am a huge Beatles fan! Have every album! Reminds me that there is a radio station that does "Breakfast With The Beatles" every Sunday morn (least they used to). They get rare songs, and alternate versions of songs I have never heard! Don't know how they get them!

We are a growing and progressive group.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

All types of music welcome? I'll post some D.C. Talk, Jars of Clay, and Creed regularly. lol

Did Jesus know that the earth is round?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

For the same reason he didn't know E = mc2? Impossible to know at the time. Yes, I know I could look through the charachter map and find the squared symbol, but it'd take forever.

Buying happiness.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

It doesn't buy happiness, but knowing you have enough to cover all your bills all the time is nice. The happniess part... well you can rent a hooker in Nevada. Just saying.

What should I practice with Jiu Jitsu with hernia injury?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

STOP AND TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT IT! A hernia can rupture and you can die! Be safe, and take it careful!

The US political system is not fit for purpose anymore.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I've been saying we need to get rid of the two party system for years. I wish Sanders would have become president. Johnson didn't have a snowballs chance in hell. I don't vote for someone just because they have a D or a R stamped on their head (but I am a registered Democrat). I should change it to Libertarian. Don't know what good that would do. We only have red and blue states.

What’s the best way to get started on here?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

V Already said what I was going to say. If there is any thing a a faux pas it's just to use common sense. Don't make hate speeches, don't dog on other people, etc. Oh and if you are a trump supporter, you will probably get a lot of negative replies!

She had enough

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

I looks like he has a huge smile on his face without his wife. lol

It's actually 14% now....

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 23, 2018:

Hey that the same % as trump's approval rating!

Relationship advice: A young bachelor with no children dating a woman with two children.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

For MOST parents their kids come first. You are second. That hinders the relation immediately! I don't wanna play baby daddy either. And dealing with the father isn't fun. Voice of experience. However, for someone my age, it's hard to find someone that does not have kids.

Do you really care if another member blocks you?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Where's the "I don't give a flying fuck motherfucker & shove it up your asshole" button. That's my answer.

Made the kids dinner My son is picky so I cooked a salmon filet for him.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Salmon fillet FTMFW! Your son has class! Bake it with a bit of olive oil (to not stick) and skinless! If I get a bad cut, I use Chef Pauls Magic Salmon Seasoning. If I get suckered into salmon with skin, I broil the top, then it just comes right off!

Facebook improvements

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

I'm rarely on FB. I usually just check messenger.

Men who never learned to cook

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Some women don't know how to cook either! Let me tell you a 100% true story. My old roommates girl came over. He asked her to cook a FROZEN PIZZA. She said she didn't know how to do it. He said read the instructions on the back. So she finally figured out how to turn the oven on. A while later, something was burning. It was the pizza. She said "I didn't know you had to check on it". She was close to her 21st bday.

For those who are not familiar with our Lord and saviour here is the link to the Gospel of Flying ...

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Believe it or not, but Pastafarian is an actual religion. Don't think anyone actually believes it tho. There was a kid a few years ago that got kicked out of school because he dressed up a pirate. Said it was part of his religion. I think a sociology teacher in Kansas made the whole thing up. If you see OMFSM! You know what I mean.

Even though it’s not cold here, it has been rainy all day.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Can I have some?

Stay healthy

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Now I have to post this! DRINKING IS GOOD FOR YOU! lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7kJRGPgvRQ

Doesn't Jesus seem kinda gay in this meme? Aren't those gay pride colors?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

A guy that died at 33 with no kids. Wondered around the desert with his 40 boyfriends. I don't see how he could have been gay! I have him beat! I'll be 35 in april.

I had just seen a post that raises red flags when it comes to scammers.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

I just refreshed a profile for an online dating sight. FUCK ME JESUS! I've gotten over 30 "wants to meet me", and a few messages. I check on a profile, and there isn't even a complete sentense in the profile! Also I've seen others that have a picture of a thong. Bet it's them! Just like the porn star that wants to hang out. Seems legit...

[google.com] (TedCruz Zodiac Killer) With the close Senate race in Texas thought of this.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

He was born in 1970. The first killing was in 1968.

Here's a little teaser for you..... How many Beatles songs can you identify in this drawing?

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Octopuss's garden. Help!. Working Class Hero (Lennon tho). Hello Goodbye. I'm the Walrus. Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds. Being for The Benefit of Mr. Kite. Yellow Submarine. Happy Birthday. Max's Silver Hammer (although not silver in the pic looks grey). Strawberry Fields. Bout all I can think of. Interesting post tho. I'm gonna be staring at this pic all day, and editing!

Last night I was out with The Phoenix Atheists Meetup group at a local restaurant.

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

Should have given the note back with an imprint of a penis. Told them nothing matched. :)

Donald Trump's global insignificance is about to be exposed - CNN

TheGreatShadow comments on Sep 22, 2018:

He's a self-centered, ego-worshiping dumbfuck! One of these days I think he will realize it.