TomMcGiverin's Profile

How many have encountered a similar story?

powder comments on Jan 29, 2021:

My ex had zero empathy, just not in her. I discovered several things about her and people like her.. #1 the only way they get pleasure is if it happens directly to them. Empathetic pleasure is non existent ie sharing pleasure in another's joy/ success. Because of this they appear selfish. ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 30, 2021:

@powder To quote the bard," The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind...".

How many have encountered a similar story?

powder comments on Jan 29, 2021:

My ex had zero empathy, just not in her. I discovered several things about her and people like her.. #1 the only way they get pleasure is if it happens directly to them. Empathetic pleasure is non existent ie sharing pleasure in another's joy/ success. Because of this they appear selfish. ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 29, 2021:

@powder And it makes you wonder how much of that lack of empathy is their environment growing up and how much is simply bad seed genetics. My hunch is that it's mostly the latter, but if it's the former it's from being spoiled and entitled their whole damn life.

How many have encountered a similar story?

powder comments on Jan 29, 2021:

My ex had zero empathy, just not in her. I discovered several things about her and people like her.. #1 the only way they get pleasure is if it happens directly to them. Empathetic pleasure is non existent ie sharing pleasure in another's joy/ success. Because of this they appear selfish. ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 29, 2021:

Sounds like you are describing sociopath or psychopathic personalities.

Why are drugs so outrageously expensive? [youtube.com]

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 29, 2021:

Very simple. It's legalized extortion against the patients and legalized bribery between the lobbyists and the pols. It won't end until most people are willing to vote third party on this single issue if nothing else. Sometimes I dream of a huge mob storming the capital in DC, not for an ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 29, 2021:

@RoboGraham I would love to see a series of general strikes and mass protest in the streets. I think they would work, but it would take tens of millions being committed to it for quite a while. I just don't see enough people developing the kind of guts and awareness for that to happen. I think civil war, started by the right wing proles, being much more likely.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

bobwjr comments on Jan 25, 2021:

Avoid that

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 29, 2021:

@Santanaman9 Tried that, won't do it again. It's a duplication and a waste of time. I soon discovered that that same single women that were at the Meetup groups were also on the dating sites, trying to improve their odds, but really not making any difference.

Biden is Already Breaking Promises It was inevitable that President Joe Biden would betray ...

Piece2YourPuzzle comments on Jan 27, 2021:

I left another website because of the inability of people on either side to see reality. The responses to Biden's bullshit by the Democrats is sickening. Just as sickening as the Republicans response to Trump's bullshit. Two cults. There is no breaking them out of their illusion. Disagree with ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 29, 2021:

@Piece2YourPuzzle The problem is that even people with common sense don't have the moral courage and independence to choose to think differently than what the media and the majority of the sheeple believe. Most people are just not that strong and brave enough to buck the bandwagon.

Satire: Republicans Say It Is Unconstitutional to Hold Officials Accountable Unless They Are Hillary...

Barnie2years comments on Jan 28, 2021:

Pretty much how they operate. They can do whatever they want, but scream bloody murder about anything Democrats do, or they even think they did.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 28, 2021:

Repubs are genetically incapable of feeling shame or embarrassment whenever they are accused of hypocrisy. They are also reflexively prone to projection.

Socialism IS a scareword, most often confused with Communism thanks to over 60 years of American ...

yvilletom comments on Jan 28, 2021:

Socialism is what they called: 1. the direct initiative’s democracy, 2. the referendum’s repeal of what a legislature did, and 3. the recall’s removal from elective office. In short, socialism is what they called the consent of the governed. They want the governed to pay taxes and ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 28, 2021:

Socialism is what the ruling class calls anything that involves the lower classes doing something beside shutting up, paying their taxes, obediently going to work instead of striking, and supporting all wars started for the benefit of the ruling class.

Not sure who needs to hear this, but a lot of the people in this group are exactly whom this song ...

Redheadedgammy comments on Jan 27, 2021:

I would need lyrics to understand what the writer of this song is saying. I cannot understand much of it.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 28, 2021:

I think many musical artists of this age group really don't care about whether their song lyrics are understandable or hearable to older people. That's their prerogative, but it makes for their music being limited in who it reaches and influences, which should be a consideration in protest or political songs. Esp. since our generation tends to vote in way higher percentages than people under 30.

Biden is Already Breaking Promises It was inevitable that President Joe Biden would betray ...

Piece2YourPuzzle comments on Jan 27, 2021:

I left another website because of the inability of people on either side to see reality. The responses to Biden's bullshit by the Democrats is sickening. Just as sickening as the Republicans response to Trump's bullshit. Two cults. There is no breaking them out of their illusion. Disagree with ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 28, 2021:

@Piece2YourPuzzle Because corporate media is about all that is available to most people outside of the internet. And many people who do have access to the net and non-corporate media sources of news either don't know about those options or feel too demoralized to spend time and energy on seeking that info and commentary. They feel it won't make any difference, so they instead escape into following sports, playing video games, etc. It provides diversion that doesn't bring them down further emotionally. I used to be able to watch Free Speech TV on my Direct TV package of channels. Then something caused me to no longer be able to get the signal, even after the satellite dish was destroyed and replaced following a storm. I am still paying for that channel, but to get it I would have to individually pay a $90 fee for a service visit to get the dish adjusted to pick up that channel again. Since about the only show on FSTV that seems worthwhile to me is Democracy Now!, I'm not going to spend the money. I'll settle for CommonDreams.org on the net, which is free of charge.

Radicalizing is a serious problem. This info may be of help. [youtu.be]

Larimar comments on Jan 27, 2021:

https://time.com/5886348/report-peaceful-protests/ This is not a both sides issue to the point some on this site would like others to believe. It was far right infiltrating and performing destruction to make others believe that it was BLM or Antifa and the latter isn't even an organization! ONE...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 27, 2021:

Damn right. It smacks way too much of Trump's post Charlottesville talk of "good people on both sides". Horseshit!

Biden is Already Breaking Promises It was inevitable that President Joe Biden would betray ...

Piece2YourPuzzle comments on Jan 27, 2021:

I left another website because of the inability of people on either side to see reality. The responses to Biden's bullshit by the Democrats is sickening. Just as sickening as the Republicans response to Trump's bullshit. Two cults. There is no breaking them out of their illusion. Disagree with ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 27, 2021:

True that. Fortunately for me, I'm not a member of either party's cult groups. I bash Biden from the left, as I am a proud socialist. I get sick and tired of centrist Dems attacking me for that and knowingly lying by saying I must be a Repub to attack Biden. I hate both major parties just about equally, as they serve and are owned by the same people.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

RonWilliam53 comments on Jan 26, 2021:

Possibly fewer women are willing to open up and/or spend that much effort because they know a) they pretty well have the pick of the litter b) guys won't actually read it or care what it says c)meeting even for coffee will answer more questions

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 27, 2021:

@RonWilliam53 I think just about all men put numbers on women, at least mentally. Some are honest enough, like me, to say it out loud to others, some won't. I have never given a fuck about PC speech. Take it or leave it as you will. I won't have sex with someone who is below a certain level of looks, namely about the same level as me. Other men, including you, apparently, aren't so discriminating. I can't lie to myself or others about who or when I'm attracted to someone. Like Sticks says, the chemistry is there or it isn't. If it isn't, why waste anybody's time, yours or theirs?

Ok just asking for advice here.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 20, 2021:

My wife died four years ago after suffering for several years with dementia, so I can relate. Between missing her, mostly failing at trying to find love again thru two years of the dating scene, then Covid putting it all on hold, I am feeling doubtful I will ever find love like that (my marriage) ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@James121 You have my condolences, it sounds like it was a good marriage and the way it ended was horrible, even if it was brief. My wife's illness lasted several years. I can't say which is worse.

Ok just asking for advice here.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 20, 2021:

My wife died four years ago after suffering for several years with dementia, so I can relate. Between missing her, mostly failing at trying to find love again thru two years of the dating scene, then Covid putting it all on hold, I am feeling doubtful I will ever find love like that (my marriage) ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@James121 If you are being serious, that is really shocking and if it were me, I would be really traumatized about it for a good while. How did that play out for you? Women love guys that can play an instrument and sing, esp. if they are at least decent at both, even if not a pro. You should have an easy time finding someone once you are ready for the game.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

RonWilliam53 comments on Jan 26, 2021:

Possibly fewer women are willing to open up and/or spend that much effort because they know a) they pretty well have the pick of the litter b) guys won't actually read it or care what it says c)meeting even for coffee will answer more questions

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

I read all of the profile essays, make a point of referring to parts of them when I send the initial message, but it doesn't seem to cut any ice with over 90% of the women I approach. The problem with waiting for the coffee meeting to answer ?s about the women is kind of selfish on their part. I mean, how do they know men aren't just as interested as they are in getting some of those ?s answered before sending out an initial message to a woman that has a clear deal breaker about them that could have been addressed in the essay. I think they are being somewhat evasive with their tight-lipped approach to profile essays. It wouldn't bother me if men on dating sites were not forced to almost always play the pursuer. I get tired of sending a few dozen messages a week knowing that almost all of them will never get a reply, and even more so knowing that a good bunch of them could be avoided if the woman was more forthcoming in their essay. So, in conclusion, I think most of it comes down to a), the women knowing they can sit back and wait for the messages to pour in, esp. if their looks are above average. My guess is that most of the women who bother to message men first are below average looking, who don't get many messages from men approaching them first, so they take matters into their own hands out of necessity. Sound about right? The last woman I dated from a dating site was a 4 or a 5 on the looks scale and she admitted to me that she didn't get many messages from men, so that proves my point.

Today is Angela Davis' birthday.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 26, 2021:

She used to be so radical. Nowadays she sells out, caves, and tells people to vote for corrupt Dem pols.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@LucyLoohoo You compromise enough and eventually you become no different than the corrupt mainstream pols. This now includes Bernie Sanders, who regularly caves to the establishment Dems so he can get committee assignments in the Senate, where he still is unable to actually do anything for the people. AOC has also sold out and cannot be counted on to stand up to Pelosi's corrupt policies. These two should have left the Dem Party and built a real People's Party.

Today is Angela Davis' birthday.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 26, 2021:

She used to be so radical. Nowadays she sells out, caves, and tells people to vote for corrupt Dem pols.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@Spinliesel It's just the honest truth. She used to be a communist, a Black Panther, and someone who helped break another Panther out of prison. A far cry from someone telling people to vote for lesser evil Dems that take corporate money and work against the working class and poor people.

How many good friends do you have from other political tribes?

TreeSpirit comments on Jan 15, 2021:

Most all my friends from high school and childhood voted for trump. I don't know where they all stood for the 2nd term because I shut down my facebook account last June. My best friend from childhood is a trumpster - but not too extreme - we don't discuss or go there. She works for the Post ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

Everybody in my condo building is conservative and Christian. I don't mind, I just ignore them politely and live my whole social life away from my community. I don't mind driving for all my entertainment and social life away from home. If I lost ability to drive, I would be in trouble.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

Pralina1 comments on Jan 25, 2021:

Tom , I don’t think u need that trash . U look good , u can hold a conversation , u seem respectful and mindful or ladies , just go out and meet people ( w a mask ). Online dating seems weird to me , maybe I am not up to date , I don’t know .

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@RonWilliam53 I'm not willing to put the time into that. Too much politics. At least with dating sites you can already assume that most people there are single and open to dating.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

bobwjr comments on Jan 25, 2021:

Avoid that

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

I have to disagree. At my age, dating sites are really the only viable option unless you can get set up by friends, attend a church, etc. as I said below. My friends are all married and don't know any single people besides me.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

Pralina1 comments on Jan 25, 2021:

Tom , I don’t think u need that trash . U look good , u can hold a conversation , u seem respectful and mindful or ladies , just go out and meet people ( w a mask ). Online dating seems weird to me , maybe I am not up to date , I don’t know .

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 26, 2021:

@Pralina1 Not going to volunteer. Tried meetup groups. They end up being the same people you meet on dating sites, so why waste time doing the groups when you would meet the same people thru dating sites anyway? I don't do bold. I have never been that confident about my looks and now that I'm older and bald, it's even harder to approach women in person at public events. Or were you mixing up the words bald and bold?

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

Pralina1 comments on Jan 25, 2021:

Tom , I don’t think u need that trash . U look good , u can hold a conversation , u seem respectful and mindful or ladies , just go out and meet people ( w a mask ). Online dating seems weird to me , maybe I am not up to date , I don’t know .

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 25, 2021:

Thanks for the compliments and the props(esp. because women at your level of looks have never been attracted to me, even when I was young and had lots of hair on my head), Pralina, but at my age that's just not how it works these days. While I was online dating before Covid, I would even try approaching women at live music concerts and give them a sort of business card that had my name, ph. no., interests, etc. so they could call me if they wanted to get together sometime. Nobody ever called me from that. Women are just too cynical or scared to start seeing someone organically anymore unless they meet thru friends, at a job, or at church. The ones that go to bars to meet men or just go dance with their friends are not my type either. I went to a dance club once that has a big local reputation as a meeting places for singles and it was horrible. Way too loud to actually talk to someone, no way to tell without talking to them which women were just there to dance with friends and which ones were single and looking to meet someone, etc. Online dating is a cesspool and a crapshoot, but at my age, it's either that or staying alone.

Is it just my imagination, or did Match, and probably all the other dating sites as well, get rid of...

EyesThatSmile comments on Jan 25, 2021:

That is not a positive change....

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 25, 2021:

I am skeptical of the CSR's answer that most members are choosing not to include an essay. I mean, really, am I to believe that most women my age on Match in my local area are choosing to try attracting men to message them based pretty much on nothing but their pics? Because that appears to be the reality of all the newer profiles I found in my search today. It was also not a positive change, at least not in my mind, when they decided a while back to eliminate several items from the checklist of traits that were listed in profiles, both traits of the member and of what traits the member was looking for. They used to include hair color, including bald or not, as well as income level and a couple other traits like race and a couple others that escape me now, but seemed at the time to also matter. They are now down to just nine traits, all of the member, nothing anymore about what they are looking for. Another thing that doesn't seem to be there in the newer profiles is a dating age range of what age range the member is looking for. All of the changes seem to be about making the profiles simpler to deal with and more bare of info for the viewer. I really doubt that most customers are so attention span and patience challenged or so busy, that they cannot and do not want to really have anything but pics to go on in choosing who to message or potentially meet. It seems to be a race to the bottom where eventually it will be no different than putting your pic in a book for cabbies, in the old days, for them to show to customers and matchmake people that way. That and video dating where people just look at pics on a dating site and then go straight to video chatting thru the site instead of even trading text messages thru the site. It will all be about looks and nothing else eventually, I fear, as far as making it far enough to get to talk to or know the other person at all.

There is so much shouting out about FREEDOM.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 24, 2021:

Right wingers only seem to value freedom when it translates to them being nasty to others thru domination or exploitation. They really don't care about the freedom of anyone different from them, weaker than them, or poorer than them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 25, 2021:

@think-beyond Thank you for your support. Frayed Bear does not seem to grasp that my beef with him is about him saying that DINO, right center Dems are no different than Repubs, and thus, that ALL Dems are just as guilty, in his mind, of being fascist jerks as Repubs usually are. That is what my argument and what my initial disagreement with him was about. Clinton and Obama should be Repubs rather than Dems and in the old days, they would have been, before the DNC made the Dem Party into Repub lite. Saying that neoliberals like Clinton and Obama are jerks does not prove that Repub pols are better, more humane, or fair than Dems as a group than the Dems who are progressive and actually decent, caring people. FB attempts to smear all Dems as being as fascist as Repubs by tarring them with how those two DINOs are.

There is so much shouting out about FREEDOM.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 24, 2021:

Right wingers only seem to value freedom when it translates to them being nasty to others thru domination or exploitation. They really don't care about the freedom of anyone different from them, weaker than them, or poorer than them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 24, 2021:

@FrayedBear So what? The quote from Out Of The Illusion proves my point about Clinton and Obama. Those quotes were not written by you. My point stands, you are a right winger who distorts the labels in who you call leftist. You want respect from me? Then have the intellectual honesty to not refer to DINO pols like Clinton and Obama as leftist, then I could possibly respect your opinions.

To have a real legacy Biden will have to be more radical: [theguardian.com]

Killtheskyfairy comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Biden put a picture of FDR over his desk so I’m optimistic. If he doesn’t live up to his hype, then we hold his feet to the fire. People get away with what you let them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 23, 2021:

@Killtheskyfairy Time to block.

To have a real legacy Biden will have to be more radical: [theguardian.com]

Killtheskyfairy comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Biden put a picture of FDR over his desk so I’m optimistic. If he doesn’t live up to his hype, then we hold his feet to the fire. People get away with what you let them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 23, 2021:

@Killtheskyfairy My beef with identity politics is that the Dems use it as a substitute for actually fighting for the working class and poor, while too many people get suckered into thinking that ID politics is an acceptable substitute for not fighting class war on behalf of the classes that the Dems claim to be on the side of, at least more on the side of than the Repubs. The fact is, when it comes to class and who the economy is run to benefit, the two major parties are pretty much the same. You don't seem to want to admit that, much less discuss it. I'm not the only one who feels that way.

To have a real legacy Biden will have to be more radical: [theguardian.com]

Killtheskyfairy comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Biden put a picture of FDR over his desk so I’m optimistic. If he doesn’t live up to his hype, then we hold his feet to the fire. People get away with what you let them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 23, 2021:

@Killtheskyfairy Actually, I usually watch MSNBC, even tho I know they are very corporate and were very against Bernie. I'll see you in four years after Biden Harris have greased things for a Repub win for prez. Without Covid and the economic collapse, Biden would have lost and you know it.

To have a real legacy Biden will have to be more radical: [theguardian.com]

Killtheskyfairy comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Biden put a picture of FDR over his desk so I’m optimistic. If he doesn’t live up to his hype, then we hold his feet to the fire. People get away with what you let them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 23, 2021:

@Killtheskyfairy Get back to me in several months after Biden has not really done anything for average people that would cost the rich and corporate America anything. Then you can tell me I'm wrong about him. I'm not worried about being proven wrong, since I already saw this movie for eight years with Obama. Have you forgotten all that already? I haven't, but maybe identity politics and happy talk are enough for you. I promise you, it won't be enough for the working class to vote Dem in four years for prez...

To have a real legacy Biden will have to be more radical: [theguardian.com]

Killtheskyfairy comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Biden put a picture of FDR over his desk so I’m optimistic. If he doesn’t live up to his hype, then we hold his feet to the fire. People get away with what you let them.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

You two just keep telling yourself that and wishing that Biden can be influenced by peasants like us. Instead, I will choose reality..

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

Wangobango3 comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I have had many dating site experiences. One successful experience began with me reaching out to a woman who was initially sceptical. We eventually got together and were very happy until she got sick and died. I had conversations with women that never progressed beyond superficialities. The woman I...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

@Wangobango3 I have never met a single person IRL from this site, Agnostic, man or woman, because there are so few of us. Around the time I first joined, there were two or three women from my local area that I messaged and they all turned me down on meeting me. Two of them disappeared and the other still visits here occaisionally. Her photos are exceptionally good looking and I've been told by another male member here that she is a scammer and the profile is fake.

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

Wangobango3 comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I have had many dating site experiences. One successful experience began with me reaching out to a woman who was initially sceptical. We eventually got together and were very happy until she got sick and died. I had conversations with women that never progressed beyond superficialities. The woman I...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

Happy to hear it. You beat the odds and won the lottery. I think it rarely works out like it did for you. My late wife was initially skeptical of me when I met her at a folk dance as she had experienced two bad marriages and even said that night, " I don't date", but I managed to win her over. Maybe there's more opportunity for that when people meet organically rather than in the online market of dating sites, where the shopping attitude dominates it all.

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

JGal comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I will initiate an introduction if there is something interesting to respond to. This means the guy has put some thought into his profile, with a conversation starter. I will ignore any initial introduction that is too vague or generic like "hey" or "I read your profile".

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

@JGal I appreciate your honesty. A lot of people won't admit it, because they want to think of themselves as too deep and fair to have a "type" or don't want to be seen as shallow or close-minded, but the research has been done and consistently shown that instinctively people make up their minds very quickly about whether they are attracted to someone and want to see them again or meet them after just a couple minutes of meeting in person or looking at a profile's pics and info. Anyone who says different is trying to defend themselves or convince themselves they are what they're not. We have to decide fairly quickly anyway with online dating because there are so many choices we have to be efficient in the online screening. As far as in person or video chatting, we also have to decide relatively soon there too if we are lucky enough to regularly be presented with several choices each week or so, which good looking women are in online dating. I have yet to try video chatting on a dating site, but with in person meetings of women from a site, I have almost always come away from the first meeting with a clear sense of whether I would ever want a physical relationship with the woman. I find it really hard to believe that most women are really that different from me in knowing after the first meeting if they would ever want to kiss me or not, etc.

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

JGal comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I will initiate an introduction if there is something interesting to respond to. This means the guy has put some thought into his profile, with a conversation starter. I will ignore any initial introduction that is too vague or generic like "hey" or "I read your profile".

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

@JGal I just don't think anymore that there is any good reason to reply simply out of politeness, it doesn't really do someone any favors. Esp. if the reply does not make it clear that you have no real interest in that person as a potential dating partner or in ever meeting them. We don't join dating sites and then pay money to meet people just to find pen pals or platonic friends, at least not anyone that I have talked to or known. So why waste people's time with polite, but ambiguous replies?

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

itsmedammit comments on Jan 22, 2021:

Some clues here. https://www.buzzfeed.com/stephenlaconte/dating-app-secrets-employees-tell-all-reddit

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

Some of that I already knew or suspected. Since Covid, after my paid membership had run out months ago, I received a few messages which I quickly figured out were fake and generated from site employees because they were so bland and generic. This week, however, I got two new messages ( in reply to my initial message) from women who seemed to be for real and have exchanged a few messages with me. The ones from months ago never replied when I sent them a free message. I still have not signed up for a paid membership and will not do so until this summer after I am vaccinated, and I have told both recent women that is my plan. They have still continued trading robust messages with me, so I doubt I'm being played to get a subscription out of me.

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

JGal comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I will initiate an introduction if there is something interesting to respond to. This means the guy has put some thought into his profile, with a conversation starter. I will ignore any initial introduction that is too vague or generic like "hey" or "I read your profile".

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

Do you reply to a man's message if you already have decided from his pics and info that you are not interested in him due to lack of physical attraction, not seeming like a match for you, etc.? Because that is the issue I am getting at.. the issue of replying out of politeness, not genuine interest in learning more or possibly meeting him as a potential dating partner.

I'm curious what the group thinks on this issue.

BitFlipper comments on Jan 22, 2021:

There's an old saying: "man chases woman until she catches him". Technology doesn't seem to have changed that.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

No shit. I do think tho, that it probably varies some depending on where you live. Here in the rather traditional culture state of Iowa, even around the Des Moines area, people are so traditionally cultured that the women expect the men to pursue. Even the women that grew up somewhere more progressive. It's just a matter of how the water flows and people adapting to the mainstream in most cases. If a woman doesn't like it, she can always take the initiative and get delighted responses from men, providing she is smart enough to explain that she isn't promiscuous or desperate.

What's the first thing Biden and the democrats do after taking over?

Zoltans_Queen comments on Jan 22, 2021:

I love Kyle. He has really been speaking passionately lately. He's not holding anything back. And I'm not surprised that Joe went back on his promise. That was predictable, unfortunately.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

Just the opening move in four years of Obama style happy talk and focus on identity politics, but no action to benefit or improve the lives of the masses. Which will be payed back in four years or less with pissed off working class whites voting Repub in anger at the Dems betraying them, once again. People are too smart to buy the same old excuse of blaming the Repubs, because they've seen this movie too many times.. The Dems really don't care if most people quit voting, they are counting on it as long as they can continue to win some of the time with squeaker margins. If Dems actually tried to improve the lives of working class and poor people, they could win in huge landslides, but they will never do that because they love that corporate campaign money too much..

What's the first thing Biden and the democrats do after taking over?

altschmerz comments on Jan 21, 2021:

I hope he's right about the Republicans being at each other's throats, because *both* the Trumpers *and* the establishment-types are bloody fucking awful and I want to see the GOP go down in flames! Then maybe another party, a GOOD one, can take its place, and force the Democrats to shape up, ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 22, 2021:

Exactly. And those non-voters are the people who would vote for Bernie if he ever got the Dem nomination or went third party. The figures I saw for this last election were 80 million eligible voters who checked out, 78 million for Biden, and 71 million for Trump.

My cousin posts this on FB! Let's see next year on this day.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 21, 2021:

Me thinks the cousin on FB is most likely an upper middle class white male with a job that currently is not in danger of outsourcing or automation, so, of course, life with Trump seemed good for him...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 21, 2021:

@Secretguy Actually, I got a degree in Sociology from a state university and was making an educated guess. The cousin the OP is talking about appears to be voting against her own self interest and fell for the Trump lies in order to do so.

My cousin posts this on FB! Let's see next year on this day.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 21, 2021:

Me thinks the cousin on FB is most likely an upper middle class white male with a job that currently is not in danger of outsourcing or automation, so, of course, life with Trump seemed good for him...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 21, 2021:

@dave1459 I stand corrected, but she's still full of shit to think Trump was great for the country.

This sign is in my front yard (although right now there is also snow).

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 20, 2021:

Depends on how much vandalism and harassment you are interested in experiencing. They may also vandalize your house, not just the sign.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 20, 2021:

@creative51 It's your life and your property. I'm surrounded by Repubs and conservative Christians in my condo development, so even if the homeowner's association did not prohibit political signs, it would not be worth it to me to provoke them to hassle me. My only desire is to be left alone by and not hassled by my neighbors. I avoid and ignore them as much as possible, so I already have that anti-social reputation. But why bother when almost none of them are college educated, politically liberal, or at all intellectual? I've already had enough small talk about the weather to last a lifetime, so I don't need to bother pretending with them that I have any interest in them. I just use this as a place to live, nothing more...

Local Crazy Train I am trying to refrain from posting anything on Facebook that might cause ...

Wangobango3 comments on Jan 20, 2021:

The trouble is, some people actually believe that insanity. They will have to be deprogrammed.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 20, 2021:

Unfortunately the law does not allow you to kidnap, imprison, and deprogram them. Absent that, I will settle for Covid killing them off. Less trouble and grief, more efficient...

A beautiful metaphor and an accurate formula for living.

AnonySchmoose comments on Jan 20, 2021:

Excellent metaphor! I've mostly felt that competition as a way of life is unfair, because not everybody has an equal chance to benefit. That is not to say that competition in sports, contests, games, etc. is unfair. But to base an entire nation on the spirit of competition probably sets up a ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 20, 2021:

I agree. Competition has its place in sports, etc. and that's fine because those are marginal things that should not and do not determine people's ability or opportunity to have a decent life or where they fall into the social and economic order. But in America competition and individualism are made into the foundations of our economic and social systems. All that does is divide the masses against each other and insure that the ruling class stays on top while the lower classes fight for crumbs. When I was young, I participated in sports and other competitive activities and enjoyed them. I learned good things from those experiences and they were good for my character. But I was also an intellectual and I learned how toxic these concepts of extreme individualism and competition were for ordering the economy and the social order in a society. Competition for sports and harmless pastimes and activities. Socialism for economics and government. Europe has those things right and in their proper place. Too bad it didn't work out for me to live there instead of here.

Trump has never done anything for the poor.

Lorajay comments on Jan 12, 2021:

I bet they are the result of LBJ's passage of the Civil Rights Act. They no longer feel better than anyone.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 12, 2021:

On the inside, you're right, they know now they are white trash who are not any better than the colored people or immigrants they hate. But they will never admit that to anyone or show any of that shame on the outside. They're poor as dirt, but they will always cling, at least on the outside, to their belligerent pride about at least being white and Christian, rather than Muslim or atheist.

Understanding the role of Billionaire John Malone, Liberty Media and iHeartMedia (formerly Clear ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 12, 2021:

Clear Channel's programming is mostly made up of two things I hate, country music and right wing talk radio.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 12, 2021:

@Canndue You got it!

Remember when? LOL

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 11, 2021:

And yet, he was impeached, but not convicted, over that...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 12, 2021:

@josephr Lying about a blowjob is a whole other thing than lying about abuses of power and mixing foreign policy with election interference, like Trump.

Congress Votes to Arm Violent Mobs That Storm through Capitols around the World

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 11, 2021:

No surprise here. The US, thru the CIA, has been funding and supporting coups in lots of countries, usually in Latin America, for over almost a century.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 12, 2021:

@Canndue You're a sick man, but we share a similar sense of humor....

Atheists most politically active group in US, survey finds - The Christian Post

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 11, 2021:

Probably because they have to be, to protect themselves from the discrimination and harassment they experience from bigots and the religious.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 12, 2021:

@CuddyCruiser I mainly encountered it at the workplace, and there was no getting away from it as long as I needed to work. Now that I'm retired, that problem is solved.

I would definitely call this a surprise.

Pralina1 comments on Jan 11, 2021:

U mean my taxes won’t pay for his all organic expensive food .

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 11, 2021:

I doubt he's very gung ho about paying his taxes, most Trumpers aren't, esp. their leader. I'll bet his fellow Trumpers think he's a sissy for eating only organi foods.

How do you feel about Parler being removed from the Internet?

FearlessFly comments on Jan 10, 2021:

Please describe how a private company deciding not to host another company's website after terms of service were violated is censorship again ? How is that not simple capitalism?

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 10, 2021:

@Admin So I assume you are also perfectly comfortable with how a handful of media conglomerates own over 90% of all the mass media (newspapers, radio, and TV stations), which all have a pro-corporate, anti-labor, bias in favor of the ruling class and a clear hatred of any groups which are for economic equality? That kind of imbalance and monopoly are ok? Just checking.....Since they are all private companies, they can do what they want, etc. I am not ok with that status quo, but the only way it can be reformed is thru govt. regulation, which I doubt you are ok with, even tho I certainly am... We still have anti- trust laws on the books, it's just that with two corrupt, corporate-owned major parties, they never get enforced anymore....

I am not one for conspiracy theories but this struck me.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 9, 2021:

See the other post with the BuzzfeedNews article.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

@273kelvin Just check the Politics threads for a post that has a BuzzfeedNews link. You're sharp enough to find it. I'm not going to spoon feed you. Hint: An Organized Strike Disguised As A Protest.

On the phone today with my longtime religious friend, we talked of January 6th and everything ...

Detritus comments on Jan 9, 2021:

What happened on December 6?

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

That happened to be my 62nd B-day, but I'm pretty sure the OP meant Jan. 6.

You have the FBI asking the public for help in arresting these people.

redhog comments on Jan 9, 2021:

Theyre covering all the bases. If there is any justice left i. This country every single one of those people will go to sleep one night and wake up in guantanamo bay cuba with the other terrorists we've been stockpiling there since 9/11. That includes Trump, Hawley, Cruz and the other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

@redhog Oh, would I love to see Trump water-boarded, but not as much as I would savor it happening to Cheney...

You have the FBI asking the public for help in arresting these people.

redhog comments on Jan 9, 2021:

Theyre covering all the bases. If there is any justice left i. This country every single one of those people will go to sleep one night and wake up in guantanamo bay cuba with the other terrorists we've been stockpiling there since 9/11. That includes Trump, Hawley, Cruz and the other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

I would love to see every one of the Gitmo'd, but it'll never happen to any of them.

You have the FBI asking the public for help in arresting these people.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 9, 2021:

They're probably just going thru the motions and are under orders to not actually find and arrest anyone.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

@VineetHonkan My statement is clear and self evident. I'm not going to bother explaining to you, troll...

What strikes me most is how bold and brazen the terrorists were.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 9, 2021:

Why should they act any different? They know they have white privilege and on top of that, they have Trump and many congressional Repubs on their side. So what did they have to fear? They know nothing is likely to happen to them even after they left the capital. They are politically above the law ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

I believe the capital police, at the command level, were involved in a large conspiracy that went all the way up to Trump, and some of the rioters, no doubt, were aware of this conspiracy on their side, so they knew they would be treated lightly by most, if not all, of the law enforcement and military at the capital.

Plans are being fomented online for further attacks, those in charge of security cant be trusted.

Theresa_N comments on Jan 9, 2021:

And attacks like this will continue as long as we aren't trying these people for sedition.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 9, 2021:

Exactly. We need actual deterrence thru punishment, not empty words of condemnation.

There are still way too many crazies.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 8, 2021:

If they do show up, I demand that the cops and military treat them like BLM and immediately use tear gas, water cannons and start cracking heads if they even try to move past the barricades. Followed by mass arrests, prosecutions, and jail time. Time for some equal treatment, which is what's needed ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@BTHT We'll see. I'm not holding my breath...

There are still way too many crazies.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 8, 2021:

If they do show up, I demand that the cops and military treat them like BLM and immediately use tear gas, water cannons and start cracking heads if they even try to move past the barricades. Followed by mass arrests, prosecutions, and jail time. Time for some equal treatment, which is what's needed ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@BTHT I hope they do have those snipers there and ready for the inauguration. And that if they do show up armed and seem ready to shoot others, then shoot them if appropriate. If these fucks want a war, then give them one and treat them as the enemies of the government that they are.

This is fairly bizarre.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 8, 2021:

No surprise here. I would like to punch every one of these smug fucks, women included, right in the mouth.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@powder That too, as long as I didn't get caught...I would try to make sure I didn't actually harm anyone, just scare the shit out of each of them. That thought would give me a lot of satisfaction, to know I had terrified them without suffering any consequences for it. I know it would drive them mad if I got away with it. For a mere filthy peasant to get away with terrorizing them..

There's a lot of ass covering going on in the MSCM today.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 8, 2021:

True, I am not in favor of police brutality, but at the same time I am sick of the double standard of kid glove, supportive policing of right wing groups and brutal aggression against left wing groups. And one part of that would be some teachable moments of right wing groups getting to experience ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@William_Mary The 3/4 of our population are sheeple that are convinced that either the Dems will save them or that third parties could never be a way out of our duopoly's problems. They could be a way out, but not until enough people believe in them as an alternative and give up on the Dems.

Headlines read "Angry Pence.

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 8, 2021:

I wouldn't hold my breath on that. Biden has already indicated he will follow the Obama playbook of "Looking forward, not backward". No surprise at all to me, as Biden is too gutless and corrupt to do the right thing, ensure there are consequences, and deter future wrongdoing..

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@Canndue Don't waste your energy on Biden. I won't. He's too corrupt and gutless to be moved on anything that his rich donors and the DNC are not behind.

I narc’d on my FB friend who was in DC yesterday.

K9Kohle789 comments on Jan 7, 2021:

Has she ever had an MRI to see she has a brain? The lowest form of human being are Donny Dimwits followers.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@K9Kohle789 Yes, lots of people will overlook stupidity if it's in a cute package, meaning a good-looking person.

I narc’d on my FB friend who was in DC yesterday.

K9Kohle789 comments on Jan 7, 2021:

Has she ever had an MRI to see she has a brain? The lowest form of human being are Donny Dimwits followers.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

@Unicorn1824 Good looks makes the world go round. Amazing how many people end up getting out of just about anything because of their looks.

If money is speech, then the legacy of Mitch McConnell should be the burden of Trump & Republican ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Jan 7, 2021:

None of these choices are fitting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Jan 8, 2021:

I just don't see any way to force people to accept the sort of agenda you support, not in a free society. What you are proposing is something like China's policies on social engineering, like their one child policy to reduce population, where they would punish those who didn't comply by denying them financial support from the government as well as limiting their access to jobs, etc. Even that didn't work with everyone as people would find ways to get around it by killing any female babies so they could have another one that they hoped would be male. I don't want to live in a totalitarian society like that.

Buckle up DC, it's not over.

KKGator comments on Jan 7, 2021:

If they show up, I hope they regret it. I won't mourn a single one of them. They won't deserve it. Actually, I hope the lot of them get taken out. With extreme prejudice. By the REAL military.