TomMcGiverin's Profile

Ideal role of religion in society?

NoPlanetB comments on Nov 27, 2019:

I would not want to take it away from people who want it as a comfort. I would relegate it to personal use only and for adults only.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

@NoPlanetB Not into porn myself, so I didn't consider that. Sounds like that too.

Ideal role of religion in society?

NoPlanetB comments on Nov 27, 2019:

I would not want to take it away from people who want it as a comfort. I would relegate it to personal use only and for adults only.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

Sounds like weed....

As of yesterday, I am down 40 lbs in 15 weeks.

BitFlipper comments on Nov 26, 2019:

I have faced the fact that my overweight condition makes me unacceptable to most of the women I'm attracted to. I'm finally taking the project from "nice to have" to "essential". I'm down to 230 from 275, and I intend to see what life is like st 200. At 6' tall, maybe women will see something other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

@BitFlipper I totally understand, BF. Been there, have the T-shirt. Looks really do matter a lot, with both sexes, in the dating game. Personality matters, but looks are necessary to get you in the door, so to speak, so that women will first choose to read your messages and reply to you. Only after that does personality enter into the game very much.....

As of yesterday, I am down 40 lbs in 15 weeks.

BitFlipper comments on Nov 26, 2019:

I have faced the fact that my overweight condition makes me unacceptable to most of the women I'm attracted to. I'm finally taking the project from "nice to have" to "essential". I'm down to 230 from 275, and I intend to see what life is like st 200. At 6' tall, maybe women will see something other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

@IrishTxJudy Shaving is always the way to go. 200 lbs at 6' looks good to most women.

Would you rather be in love or have someone be in love with you?

Sticks48 comments on Nov 27, 2019:

Either way is bad for both people.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

@Sticks48 I figured that was the case. In those situations, a block is the only remedy.

Would you rather be in love or have someone be in love with you?

Sticks48 comments on Nov 27, 2019:

Either way is bad for both people.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2019:

@Sticks48 Sounds like trying decaf for a while might be good, Sticks, lol....

Checking out the fishies.

Sticks48 comments on Nov 25, 2019:

A buffet!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 25, 2019:

Kitty hungry for some fish....

First, you cut taxes for the rich and the deficit explodes.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 24, 2019:

The cartoon is truthful. It has always been there plan and also that of the corporate Dems as well, including Obama. Which is part of why I hate him....

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 25, 2019:

@snytiger6 I hate all lying pols, but esp. those who pretend to be for the common people. At least the Repubs pretty much tell you straight up how they are going to screw you and serve the rich.

Tonight is date number three with a woman I met on the Okay Little Winged Guy site.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 23, 2019:

What movie, I'm curious....

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2019:

@Bobbyzen Good choice. Very positive and safe.

My apologies if this has come up before, but who has been active members of matchmaking sites?

Cabsmom comments on Nov 23, 2019:

Okcupid is a good one. They have lots of questions you can answer to get a better match. Plenty of fish worked for me once. I met a great guy and we are friends with benefits now. I would like more, but he has a complicated life. Our time is horrible. Meetme was horrible for me. I ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 23, 2019:

I agree with you about Our Time. It was pretty much a waste of time for me. I have been on Match for a little over two years and I finally found someone compatible recently. Match is probably about as good as it will get, at least for my age group and area. Frankly, I think that dating sites are not likely to work for most people who are only average-looking or worse that are also seeking something long term with someone of quality.

I put theses lifters on the greenhouse they open and close as the temperature changes.

seattlepanda comments on Nov 20, 2019:

chicken man...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 20, 2019:

"he's everywhere, he's everywhere...."

Can you love a racist?

Sticks48 comments on Nov 18, 2019:

Family or really close friend, yes I have done that. Over time both changed I am happy to say. Romantic relationship, that would be a big NO! That is a tough one. Just do what you feel is right and it won't be wrong.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 19, 2019:

@Sticks48 I love that movie and that scene is priceless! " I'd like to welcome our new__", as the welcome banner quickly rolls back up and the men all draw their guns.....

Feel alone?

kimlaleona comments on Nov 17, 2019:

Yeah when it comes down to this one belief of how the universe was made. I cant expect everyone to agree with all my beliefs and some christians are pretty cool. They just feel that WE think that we came from "nothing". I can understand how that seems crazy but you cant really believe someone is ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 17, 2019:

Paragraphs......

Happy Sunday Everyone.

Haemish1 comments on Nov 17, 2019:

Surprisingly, there isn’t a Victoria’s Secret in the Butte Plaza mall - very little there beyond a call center, movie theatre and Joann’s fabrics. I’ve always been a bit too shy to venture into Victoria’s Secret (without female accompaniment:)

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 17, 2019:

@Haemish1 Exactly! I don't always have better things to do with my time, but I sure as hell have better things to do with my money. Playing the lottery would be a better investment, and I don't do that one either.

Happy Sunday Everyone.

Haemish1 comments on Nov 17, 2019:

Surprisingly, there isn’t a Victoria’s Secret in the Butte Plaza mall - very little there beyond a call center, movie theatre and Joann’s fabrics. I’ve always been a bit too shy to venture into Victoria’s Secret (without female accompaniment:)

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 17, 2019:

Same here. I'm probably one of the few men my age, except for very religious types, that has never been to a strip club and has never had any interest in going to one.

I have kinda given up on online dating for the time being.

BitFlipper comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Online is the only option for me. I have no luck at all in person. At least with online dating the rejection is delayed until the in-person meeting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 17, 2019:

@BitFlipper Good luck with that. In my experience, most women will not share with you, at least not honestly, why they are rejecting you. Most will simply not reply if you ask them, others will simply say some lame excuse rather than be honest. We usually end up having to make an assumption or else be left in the dark wondering. That's the state of things. I have no idea if men are the same way about sharing or not sharing the real reasons why women are rejected. It would be interesting to hear from women who have been bold enough to ask men.

Most of the world now thinks religion is the cause of the world's problems! [usnews.com]

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 16, 2019:

I really don't think the root cause is religion as much as greed, extreme individualism, tribalism, fear of differences in others and, most importantly, governments run by the rich, corporations, and corrupt politicians. The world could be rid of religion and these other problems would still lead to...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 16, 2019:

@BryanLV It is not healthy for societies. Go live on your own island, if you can afford one. Most Libertarians seem to desire that, except for their desire to benefit from police, fire depts, roads, and other benefits from living in societies they don't want to pay taxes for.......

I have kinda given up on online dating for the time being.

BitFlipper comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Online is the only option for me. I have no luck at all in person. At least with online dating the rejection is delayed until the in-person meeting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 16, 2019:

@BitFlipper That is puzzling and it's happened to me several times too. The women just ghosted me when I messaged them after the in person meeting. Even if you message them after the in person meeting and ask them why they don't want to see you again, you will usually not get an honest, meaningful answer, in my experience. In the end, it doesn't matter anyway as the bottom line is, you've been rejected and time to move on.

Ralph Nader on the Trump impeachment. Why are the democrats so reluctant?

dare2dream comments on Nov 15, 2019:

I think the Democrats are reluctant because they learned in 2016 that a good 40% of the American electorate don't think Trump has done anything impeachable because they are as deplorable, racist and ignorant as Trump is. The common Republican voters have been voting against their own best interests ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2019:

And they also know that an impeachment by the House will go nowhere in the Senate, just a replay of the Clinton impeachment during his second term. And, just like with Clinton, they know that the process might actually make him more popular and make the Dems look bad in comparison, the same way Clinton's impeachment made the Repubs look bad then.

On your third date, and she tells you about her FWB

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 15, 2019:

Better that she told you early on than later. Personally, I would not continue seeing someone who was so casual about sex that she was already having a continued FWB while also meeting and dating other men, but I'm sure some other men wouldn't really mind or let that hold them back from continuing ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2019:

@GreatNani I can picture some people to whom saying that or hearing that on the third date would be no big deal. Everybody's different.....

I have kinda given up on online dating for the time being.

BitFlipper comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Online is the only option for me. I have no luck at all in person. At least with online dating the rejection is delayed until the in-person meeting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2019:

I'm very sad to hear that. I hope it changes for you. I don't know that you are experiencing rejection based on your looks with online dating at the time of the in-person meeting. In my experience, the women who are going to reject me on looks usually do that well before the in person meeting by either not reading my message in the first place after seeing my main pic next to the message or they blow off my message and don't reply after reading the message and then viewing my profile. But either way, I can only infer what is going on there because no one in online dating volunteers the info that they are rejecting you on looks in a message to you. Instead they leave it unsaid.

I have kinda given up on online dating for the time being.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 14, 2019:

I can relate. Music is huge to me and I could never date someone who was much of a country music fan, as I hate that genre and the whole culture that goes with it. Same with smoking and someone who is very religious. I am currently dating someone who is a practicing Catholic, but she is not big on ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2019:

@273kelvin Country music is all the same to me. Not interested in hearing twang, the extremely deliberately nasal vocal style and endless stories of rural life. I get enough of the latter simply by living in Iowa. I don't want it thrown in my face thru music. It's really grating to hear good singers deliberately sing in a nasal voice thru their nose just to fit in with the country music scene and please their fans. I see this all the time with people at karaoke shows.

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 14, 2019:

It's funny in a sad, ironic way how much the American religious fundies have in common with the Taliban and Islamic fundamentalists, and yet, they are totally clueless about the similarities........

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2019:

@Beowulfsfriend I doubt they get it, but that is exactly the right response.

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

LisaFultonave comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Unbelievable. NOBODY better wonder why I joined this forum in search of intelligent conversation. I just don't understand why all these religious people WANT to be stupid. It's not even accidental, it's willful ignorance! And now they want to make it a LAW that you can be ignorant!!!!!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

@LisaFultonave I almost never post on FB. Just use it for messaging with friends and keeping up on entertainment events like live music.

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

KKGator comments on Nov 14, 2019:

I'm so glad I no longer live in Ohio. First, Jim Jordan, now this shit. SMFH

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

@LisaFultonave Sounds like a good plan. Glad you are self sufficient and hope you are back west soon.

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

KKGator comments on Nov 14, 2019:

I'm so glad I no longer live in Ohio. First, Jim Jordan, now this shit. SMFH

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

@LisaFultonave I pity you for still living there....

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

LisaFultonave comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Unbelievable. NOBODY better wonder why I joined this forum in search of intelligent conversation. I just don't understand why all these religious people WANT to be stupid. It's not even accidental, it's willful ignorance! And now they want to make it a LAW that you can be ignorant!!!!!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

"Confuse not the minds of the ignorant. They will only hate you for it"...

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

KKGator comments on Nov 14, 2019:

I'm so glad I no longer live in Ohio. First, Jim Jordan, now this shit. SMFH

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

@snytiger6 Not all of them are, but most of them are, if you move outside of all of the cities and towns with four year colleges. Also, you need to know that many of those book readers only read romance or mystery novels, not exactly intellectual types....

Ohio Law Would Allow Students To Give Wrong Answers Because Of Religious Belief | Michael Stone

KKGator comments on Nov 14, 2019:

I'm so glad I no longer live in Ohio. First, Jim Jordan, now this shit. SMFH

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

I once interviewed for a job in Ohio. So glad I never moved there. Sounds even more backward than Iowa, and that's saying something......

I have kinda given up on online dating for the time being.

GreenAtheist comments on Nov 14, 2019:

Are there two Bryan Adams ?? Have you ever really really ever loved a woman ?? Spanish guitars are not country twang....watch the movie Don Juan deMarco.....Johnny Depp humor with Marlon Brando and Faye Dunnaway....sung in Spanish translation the soundtrack of this film can lift up your outlook

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

I am guessing he meant Bryan Adams, the Canadian artist who is sort of Canada's version of Bruce Springsteen, only less interesting and talented. Maybe Kelvin will clarify......

Good Evening Everyone! Last night I made it to a Sushi Meetup where 25 of us filled a Japanese ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 13, 2019:

All of the good ones are taken?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2019:

@WonderWartHog99 True that!

Good Evening Everyone! Last night I made it to a Sushi Meetup where 25 of us filled a Japanese ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 13, 2019:

All of the good ones are taken?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

@sassygirl3869 I think it is true the older you get, at least until you are as old as most of the widowed folks. From young adult age to that age, those who are divorced or never married are, as another member of Agnostic said, "mostly leftovers" that are single or divorced for good reasons. The widowed folks are a better bet, unless they are not over their grief or no longer interested in a relationship with someone else.

Mostly expired!

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 12, 2019:

I would also add that online dating is not for the thin-skinned, due to all the lying, game-playing and rejection that go with it.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

@GreatNani I disagree. I think that people act like jerks online in the dating game is because the online nature of it makes it convenient and impersonal, rather than having to actually face someone in person with their behavior.

I was reading a post by a member about how hard it is to find love with another atheist because not ...

Happy_Killbot comments on Nov 13, 2019:

It must suck to be older, for me because so many people under 30 are Atheist or agnostic it's a lot easier, and most people who are Christian are open to the idea of giving up religion. The demographic shift is critical. Have you considered dating women half your age?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

@Happy_Killbot Only in your dreams.... Must only be true for older men who are hot-looking or rich. In two years of online dating, I couldn't even get one woman willing to meet me that was even five years younger than me.

Listening to impeachment hearing.

bingst comments on Nov 13, 2019:

How Trump has not been assassinated is amazing. Actually, that applies to many politicians.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

@bingst That was 150 years ago. I am talking about the last 100 years, after the US developed a deep state and a security state during the Cold War.

Listening to impeachment hearing.

bingst comments on Nov 13, 2019:

How Trump has not been assassinated is amazing. Actually, that applies to many politicians.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

Only politicians on the left get successfully assassinated, not those on the right. The reason for that is assassins of those on the left always have help or, at worst, are just patsy scapegoats. I knew Obama would never be assassinated, despite all the racist haters that threatened him. The reason was that he was very willing to sell out to the rich, corporatists, and Wall Street. They were not unhappy with him and therefore, nobody in the government was going to let their boy get whacked by some racist redneck.

Favorite questions (good or bad) that you ask or that have been asked of you (on the first few ...

A2Jennifer comments on Nov 11, 2019:

Something to the effect of “do you think most people are honest or dishonest?” In my experience, people who suspect everyone else of lying are projecting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2019:

@A2Jennifer That does seem to be the case.

Favorite questions (good or bad) that you ask or that have been asked of you (on the first few ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2019:

I have been asked, "How long have you been on the dating site?" The implication of the ? seems to be that the longer you have been on there and are still looking for a partner, the less desirable you must be to the opposite sex or else the less functional or realistic you are about what you want in ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2019:

@MsHoliday That seems like a reasonable suspicion to have.

Favorite questions (good or bad) that you ask or that have been asked of you (on the first few ...

A2Jennifer comments on Nov 11, 2019:

Something to the effect of “do you think most people are honest or dishonest?” In my experience, people who suspect everyone else of lying are projecting.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 11, 2019:

I agree about the projecting. I think that also applies to the people who say a lot in their profiles about how they don't play games or want to date game players. Talk about stating the obvious or protesting too much.......

Oooooh. When I said I wanted a partner who is talented...this isn’t exactly what I meant.

BudFrank comments on Nov 11, 2019:

I appreciate it when I’m told, “you look just like your pictures.”

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 11, 2019:

I do too and I was often told that.

Veteran's Day

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2019:

I like the bumper sticker I saw the other day that said " I will be opposing the next war".....Since most of us realize that since Vietnam every war has really been more about oil, resources, or empire, rather than the actual defense of the US or innocent people abroad.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 11, 2019:

@GipsyOfNewSpain I agree that the Vietnam War was about both empire and the fear of communism.

I became draft age in ’75 as America’s direct military involvement in the Vietnam conflict had ...

DavidDuhon comments on Nov 11, 2019:

I think we do no favor calling our soldiers heroes rather than recognizing them as victims and making sure they get the help they need.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 11, 2019:

@WilliamCharles You know that and I know that, but many military people, veterans, and their supporters, are too blind to see and admit these truths. I have become fed up with trying to open their eyes or confront them on this, tired of them taking it as a personal attack.

I became draft age in ’75 as America’s direct military involvement in the Vietnam conflict had ...

DavidDuhon comments on Nov 11, 2019:

I think we do no favor calling our soldiers heroes rather than recognizing them as victims and making sure they get the help they need.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 11, 2019:

Some of our soldiers were, and even are today, heroes, and some aren't. The problem is that many of those that are victims, rather than heroes, are too proud and/or mentally fucked up to realize it. Which is why one must tread carefully in treating or labeling any soldiers as victims, no matter how accurate the description, because it may provoke violence upon you by them or their supporters, both of whom are intensely sensitive to any kind of perceived insult to the troops or veterans.

I sure wish the Obama's would throw their support to Bernie. That would be huge! [cnn.com]

WilliamCharles comments on Sep 9, 2019:

Though that was part of the "Hope and Change" people were expecting, he did not deliver. Sadly, he was largely a Trojan Horse meant as a continuation of the status quo.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

My fear is that Warren is being groomed to be the new Trojan Horse to fool liberals in case none of the centrists the Dem leadership and the establishment want can win the nomination outright. The media, the Dem leadership, and corporate America, want Biden, Mayor Pete, or Harris to be the nominee, but if those fail Warren is their fallback candidate to serve as the next Obama-all liberal talk, no change, but plenty of selling out.......

Bernie Sanders is a BEAST - Bold Leadership [youtube.com] A few clips of his passionate moments.

Athena comments on Oct 21, 2019:

Always fought consistently for the right issues. He is consistent, bold and a politician who actually cares! And no skeletons in that closet.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

Same as Ralph Nader. So the media and establishment cope with him by either ignoring him, smearing him, or ridiculing him, that is when they are not bashing him for his age, health, or being too angry.......

Ryan Grim Calls-Out MSNBC On-Air For Ignoring Bernie Sanders [youtube.com]

Athena comments on Oct 26, 2019:

I can't wait until he shows those fuckers what he's made of when he wins 2020.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

@Athena I agree with all of your last assessment. What happened in 2016 was that Bernie's supporters either voted third party, like me, or didn't vote at all, while I heard that about 10% of Trump's voters said they would have voted for Bernie instead of Trump, but instead voted for Trump because of how much they hated Hillary.

Ryan Grim Calls-Out MSNBC On-Air For Ignoring Bernie Sanders [youtube.com]

Athena comments on Oct 26, 2019:

I can't wait until he shows those fuckers what he's made of when he wins 2020.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

@Athena I don't doubt that some Bernie supporters might not vote for Warren if she were nominated over him, but I still maintain that the Dem leaders and establishment of the party care more about stopping him than winning over Trump. I think they would be fine with another term for Trump. So I don't see them nominating him in order to beat Trump. As far as my own voting, it's too early for me to say what I'll do if Bernie gets screwed again on the nomination. Last time I voted for Stein. If Warren were nominated, I would probably vote for her but not expect much of anything, other than a replay of the Obama years of selling out......

Ryan Grim Calls-Out MSNBC On-Air For Ignoring Bernie Sanders [youtube.com]

Athena comments on Oct 26, 2019:

I can't wait until he shows those fuckers what he's made of when he wins 2020.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

I truly hope I'm wrong, but I don't think he'll get the chance with the Dems denying him the nomination. I have no doubt he would beat Trump if nominated by the Dems.

Any other women feel this way?

Sticks48 comments on Nov 9, 2019:

And men are... Too bald Too short Too fat Too weak Too strong... or don't have enough money. Being a human being is full of disappointments.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2019:

Like you always say, Sticks, it goes both ways......

Well it was inevitable that dating sites would start doing this and I know of one site so far, the ...

Dancing comments on Nov 8, 2019:

I like to know how my potential date feels about weed. I wouldn't filter for it but it's definitely something that I ask very shortly into a conversation. I can see in pictures if a guy is bald. I don't think baldness is a reason to not date someone.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2019:

@Doraz That is my point. A good dating site that cared about it's customers would allow or facilitate as much sharing of info as possible in the profiles. Instead, most of them just want to operate as cheaply as possible and make the profiles as brief as possible in order to do that.

This seemed worth sharing.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 7, 2019:

I am fine with the rest of the list because none of those things causes any harm to others, esp. innocent people. But guns do, so I am not ok with unlimited gun rights.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2019:

@Logician As Bart Simpson would say, "Get bent"....

Facebook Dating.

slydr68 comments on Nov 8, 2019:

Men generally pick by the picture and don't read, at least in my experience...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2019:

Not true in my case, but I agree with your generalization.

Well it was inevitable that dating sites would start doing this and I know of one site so far, the ...

Dancing comments on Nov 8, 2019:

I like to know how my potential date feels about weed. I wouldn't filter for it but it's definitely something that I ask very shortly into a conversation. I can see in pictures if a guy is bald. I don't think baldness is a reason to not date someone.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2019:

The problem is many women do feel it's a reason not to date someone and we have no way of knowing that now unless they say so in their profile essay. I prefer having as much info as possible about someone's preferences in the profile so I don't waste time messaging people who are not compatible. Wouldn't you prefer that all profiles say whether they are conservative or strongly religious, so you didn't have to waste time messaging people who are that??

Well it was inevitable that dating sites would start doing this and I know of one site so far, the ...

darthfaja comments on Nov 7, 2019:

Why do people on this site use words like Batch instead of Match? I’ve noticed it many times and I’ve never understood why.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 7, 2019:

@CarolinaGirl60 Very true. I think they only care about our money. Whenever I have contacted them about their changes in profile format, they have simply blown me off with excuses for why they changed their policies. They really don't care about their members as long as they pay.

Well it was inevitable that dating sites would start doing this and I know of one site so far, the ...

darthfaja comments on Nov 7, 2019:

Why do people on this site use words like Batch instead of Match? I’ve noticed it many times and I’ve never understood why.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 7, 2019:

Because the originator of the group asked us to not use the proper name of the dating sites we are referring to in order to maintain plausible deniability in case the dating sites read our posts and comments and didn't like what we said about them. It makes it harder for them to sue Agnostic.com or cause trouble for us.

Well it was inevitable that dating sites would start doing this and I know of one site so far, the ...

Sticks48 comments on Nov 7, 2019:

Since my pictures show I am bald, that isn't a problem. Since they see my profession is musician they assume I smoke pot, have no money, and I am a heathen, and they would be right.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 7, 2019:

I get that Sticks. They can see we are bald from our photos. I just resent having to waste time on messaging women who will reject me on that when there is and was an easy way to prevent that before the site took away the trait listing option of women being able to list what hair colors, including baldness, that they were looking for and willing to accept. I just resent the extra work of messaging women who are unaccepting of this when I could be spared that. It makes me feel like the site doesn't care at all about me as a member.

This seemed worth sharing.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 7, 2019:

I am fine with the rest of the list because none of those things causes any harm to others, esp. innocent people. But guns do, so I am not ok with unlimited gun rights.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 7, 2019:

@azzow2 Bullshit argument and you know it. The fact is that way too many people are too nuts or hateful to be trusted with guns, hence, we need reasonable gun control laws to prevent the carnage these people wreak with their guns.

I am curious as to whether other women find the following passages (taken verbatim from a message to...

273kelvin comments on Nov 4, 2019:

Okay, this guy is an arseshole and if a woman posted that I would swipe left too. However, there are some small grains of truth there. I have pretty much stopped online dating atm because you see the same faces month in and month out. Some of them have been there for years. Now I would say this to ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 4, 2019:

@Gwendolyn2018 I suspect that on sites like Match, that men do outnumber women by quite a bit, even at my age.

I am curious as to whether other women find the following passages (taken verbatim from a message to...

273kelvin comments on Nov 4, 2019:

Okay, this guy is an arseshole and if a woman posted that I would swipe left too. However, there are some small grains of truth there. I have pretty much stopped online dating atm because you see the same faces month in and month out. Some of them have been there for years. Now I would say this to ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 4, 2019:

@Gwendolyn2018 In my two years of online dating I have seen at least several dozen profiles of women that interested me, maybe even close to a hundred or more, but have only ended up with about a dozen that I met in person after messaging them, getting replies from them, and then messaging enough to ge thru the usual dealbreakers positively enough to end up meeting. That means out of about a hundred or more women that I liked enough to want to meet, only about twelve of them were positively impressed enough to want to meet me. In other words, you were getting a lot more interest from the opposite gender than I was. Some of that is probably because men on dating sites are more aggressive than women and try contacting more women than vice versa.

I am curious as to whether other women find the following passages (taken verbatim from a message to...

273kelvin comments on Nov 4, 2019:

Okay, this guy is an arseshole and if a woman posted that I would swipe left too. However, there are some small grains of truth there. I have pretty much stopped online dating atm because you see the same faces month in and month out. Some of them have been there for years. Now I would say this to ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 4, 2019:

Quite true. Theoretically, there are hundreds of women in my local area that fit my age range, but after you factor in the deal breakers and traits that you mentioned, as well as the limited number of women that will accept a bald, childless, Agnostic man (when the vast majority of women's profiles make it clear that they only want men who are family men who are also Christian and above average looking), it really comes down to only a couple handfuls of women to choose from that are mutually compatible. Which is why in two years of online dating, I only met about a dozen women in person from the dating site.

Are there songs that have distinct religious messages or even religious overtones that you like ...

kiramea comments on Nov 3, 2019:

I used to listen to a group call The Second Chapter of Acts when I was younger. I still occasionally listen to them because I love their harmonies. At the moment I'm obsessed with a group called The Hu. It's more spirituality then religion (they're a Mongolian Heavy Metal band), but their music is ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 3, 2019:

Same way with me as far as The Second Chapter and also Barry McGuire during his Christian rock days.

Has anyone here ever felt good about online dating apps etc.?

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 2, 2019:

They are very impersonal and most of them do not allow you to put enough info into your profile for people to learn enough about you for matching. Thus, with most dating sites it comes down to people selecting others to contact mostly based on the attractiveness of their profile photos. In other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 3, 2019:

@GreatNani It is what it is......

Has anyone here ever felt good about online dating apps etc.?

Rignor comments on Nov 2, 2019:

After my separation a divorce in 2010-11, I was “dating” someone (long painful story) I met IRL. Towards the end of that episode, I started to realize what I wanted in a partner. I tried signing up for one site, and was actually rejected, told that “they could it help me”. That was the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 3, 2019:

@GreatNani They do that with the dysthymia scale. Dysthymia is a form of depression that is very long term and chronic, but milder than major depression. If you score too high on that scale, which is part of the E site's profile inventory of ?s, they reject you as a member.

Has anyone here ever felt good about online dating apps etc.?

Rignor comments on Nov 2, 2019:

After my separation a divorce in 2010-11, I was “dating” someone (long painful story) I met IRL. Towards the end of that episode, I started to realize what I wanted in a partner. I tried signing up for one site, and was actually rejected, told that “they could it help me”. That was the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2019:

The E site has a dysthymia scale that they use to screen out anyone who is prone to depression. I'm guessing that's why they rejected you. Rightly or wrongly, anyone who has issues with depression is unable to use that site, so that leaves only the rest for them. The M site is the only one I've found that seems worth any money because the others, at least in my area, do not have the combination of both a deep enough dating pool and an adequate amount of info in the profiles to know who is compatible or not.

Has anyone here ever felt good about online dating apps etc.?

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 2, 2019:

They are very impersonal and most of them do not allow you to put enough info into your profile for people to learn enough about you for matching. Thus, with most dating sites it comes down to people selecting others to contact mostly based on the attractiveness of their profile photos. In other ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2019:

@GreatNani You've got it!

Opinion: Why millennials are skipping church and not going back

moosepucky comments on Oct 28, 2019:

They get all they need and want from their cell phones.

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 28, 2019:

@moosepucky As Bernie would say, " We are doomed!". I generally feel loathing and disgust about these trends in that generation, while they feel no love lost for Boomers like me. In each case, there is plenty to dislike about the other generation as a whole, while at the same time there are good and righteous members of each generation.

Opinion: Why millennials are skipping church and not going back

TomMcGiverin comments on Oct 28, 2019:

After reading the article, and looking at my own experience, I would say that most of these millennials are going to be in for a long life of loneliness without much in the way of community or social support systems after they leave church behind. Unfortunately, for most Americans who don't do ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 28, 2019:

@TrailRider I doubt it. I have tried a few Meetup groups in my local area and they do not seem like much of a substitute for actual communities like churches. The vast majority of people in Meetup groups do not seem to have any real loyalty or commitment to these groups. Instead, the usual pattern of behavior of these young people is to officially join a bunch of these groups at the same time while actually only attending maybe one or two of these groups, and even then, to not attend them regularly. Their whole attitude towards these groups seems to be one of trying to constantly give themselves lots of options of things to do, then deciding as late as possible which option is the best one, for fear of missing out on something better that might come along. Very shallow and self-centered. Not the way that community is built between people.

Lol. Did anyone watch game 5 of the world series?

Deiter comments on Oct 28, 2019:

Not to be a Deiter Downer but the true flex of power, real power, is to be a complete criminal, to blatantly enrich yourself, install your sycophantic family as advisors, to lie knowing they know you're lying while having the support of a fawning party and media channels that make you completely ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 28, 2019:

Leonard Cohen has proven to be a true prophet with songs like that ( Everybody Knows) and The Future....

Hi Everyone! Good Evening! Got home from work by 2.

BitFlipper comments on Oct 24, 2019:

I'm retired so have no work life. I've been trying to create a social life to distract myself from the loneliness, and it's turning into a burden. Sometimes I think I would rather just stay in bed all day every day.

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 24, 2019:

I hear you on that. Before I met someone recently, it was pretty tough most days to stay out of bed after getting up. Much easier now. I guess hope and some companionship do a lot to lift one's mood. This is only the second time in my life that I have had someone to date steadily AND not have problems with either getting work or dealing with a bad job situation. This is probably as good as it gets and I try to remember that.

It must be the change of seasons or some other phenomena I am unaware of, all of a sudden I've been ...

Soarfeet comments on Oct 21, 2019:

feast or famine... congrat's on finding one that suits you.

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 21, 2019:

@Soarfeet I have never been overwhelmed with choices to the point of needing to hide my profile, but it seems like nowadays most women, like you, who are above average-looking, seem to end up hiding their profiles some of the time. I assume they do that because they become overwhelmed with messages from men. So, I have to disagree with your assumption that both genders are wrong in thinking it goes equally both ways as far as being overwhelmed with choices. But then again, I am not above average-looking and you are. I think it is more about level of looks, rather than gender, that determines who is spoiled with too many choices. I also have not been on dating sites for ten years, just the last two.

It must be the change of seasons or some other phenomena I am unaware of, all of a sudden I've been ...

Soarfeet comments on Oct 21, 2019:

feast or famine... congrat's on finding one that suits you.

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 21, 2019:

It really does go that way with dating sites. Jan.-Feb. and late summer seem to the feast times.

I had a coffee with the woman I've chatting with for about three weeks.

BitFlipper comments on Oct 19, 2019:

I've had meetings with a few women in the past few months where there was likewise no chemistry, BUT the experience has served to let me be more relaxed and less nerdy. Just yesterday I had dinner with one special woman, and all those seemingly-pointless meetings paid off. I was relaxed and ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 19, 2019:

Exactly right. Getting regular practice at meeting women from the dating sites is very important in maintaining your skills, remaining relaxed when you do meet someone, and in building confidence in yourself as being dateable. Every opportunity to meet someone is worth the time and effort. Without regular meetings, all those things become rusty and not as strong

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TomMcGiverin comments on Oct 13, 2019:

In my two years of experience on paid dating sites, the better female prospects never reach out to me first. Only two women ever did that seemed at all attractive looking enough for me to be interested in them, but otherwise, those two were not compatible for me. The blunt truth is that most of the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 13, 2019:

@GreenAtheist I'm afraid you are generally right about Iowa women. They mostly want only men who are at least above average looking, family men with kids, and also Christians. We are chasing a very small percentage of the dating pool here.

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Dancing comments on Oct 13, 2019:

I've reached out first on those sites if a guy catches my attention. I hope I'm a good candidate. 🤔😜

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 13, 2019:

@Doraz I just tell the truth as I see it and let the chips fall. As I get older tho, I do try harder to be tactful if the truth would hurt feelings.

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TomMcGiverin comments on Oct 13, 2019:

In my two years of experience on paid dating sites, the better female prospects never reach out to me first. Only two women ever did that seemed at all attractive looking enough for me to be interested in them, but otherwise, those two were not compatible for me. The blunt truth is that most of the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 13, 2019:

@Deiter Well it's definitely true for the majority of women in Iowa, where most are still pretty traditional and conservative when it comes to dating, even the college-educated women. Most of them are only modern, at least in my experience, in that they don't expect the man to pay all the time for meals or entertainment when they are dating someone new. But as far as who pursues who, the men are still expected to do all the work.

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Dancing comments on Oct 13, 2019:

I've reached out first on those sites if a guy catches my attention. I hope I'm a good candidate. 🤔😜

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 13, 2019:

You are the rare exception. Most women who reach out first, at least in my local area, are not nearly as attractive-looking as you.

Dating sites.

UUNJ comments on Oct 10, 2019:

No luck on Match so far, but I’m signed up for two local Match-sponsored events — a hike and a sausage-making class. Maybe meeting live will work out.

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 12, 2019:

I've been on Match for two years now and even tho my metro area has a pop. of several hundred thousand, Match has no local live events. They say there isn't enough interest, which I think is a BS excuse.

Has anyone actually paid for Match.com or is it the load of garbage I think it is?

ShadowAmicus comments on Sep 29, 2019:

Never used any pay to date site .... to me it seems much too close to paying a pimp ..... pay for sex? never have , never will ... excepting the dinners, evenings out, dresses, sexy undies ... this could become an almost endless list of payments ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 29, 2019:

Good luck to anyone about never using a paid dating site. After a certain age, they become the only real viable way to meet anyone for most people, unless they are above average looking. As for all the other ways that men indirectly pay for sex, I hear you bro, we all pay as men, either directly or indirectly...even in this day and age.....but then again, so do some sugar mamas......the only men who don't pay are gigilos and male prostitutes, I suppose...

have not been on this site for bit, had car accident and suffered a concussion, lost a month, and ...

Annabelle95991 comments on Sep 29, 2019:

Well...... Very well then

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 29, 2019:

As the actor Jim Carrey used to say in one of his roles, " Well, alrightly then!"...

Has anyone actually paid for Match.com or is it the load of garbage I think it is?

BitFlipper comments on Sep 29, 2019:

I've paid for OKCupid and Zoosk, and I've connected with a few and even met a couple. I have to attribute my lack of success to the fact that I'm just not attractive enough.

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 29, 2019:

No offense Bit, you're probably right about that. I know that, and being very offbeat for my local dating market, were probably why I had almost two years of failure. It is what it is.......

Has anyone actually paid for Match.com or is it the load of garbage I think it is?

lerlo comments on Sep 29, 2019:

Yes I've paid a couple times but they give men a guarantee, if you dont fall in love in 6 months the next 6 are free. But WARNING, they dont take profiles off the site of people no longer on there. So you could be messaging someone who will never get it. I guess if you just wait for contacts to ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 29, 2019:

Most people from Match are on other sites. I've seen it by browsing other sites and from OT. All sites have a lot of old, inactive profiles. Also, I got two free six month subscriptions from Match after not finding anyone. I was on the end of one of those when I met the woman I am now dating. Took almost two years to meet anyone right for me and someone to date steady. Match no longer appears to offer the free six month thing anymore to men if you don't meet anyone steady, so I lucked out on that. I still ended up paying for three six month memberships on Match.

No space for Mommy on the couch. But that's ok cause Mommy sits on the chair.

TomMcGiverin comments on Sep 29, 2019:

Looks like someone is a crazy cat person with too many cats.

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 29, 2019:

@graceylou I sometimes feel the same way about humans, so no offense meant. I am glad you keep the rescues with no homes.

Let's END PERSONHOOD for corporations and get money out of politics.

TomMcGiverin comments on Sep 27, 2019:

It's a nice thought, but the only way big money will get taken out of politics is if a majority of the voters were willing to start voting for a third party that backed this, along with a credible threat of voters dumping all the incumbents from both corrupt major parties. Then, and only then, would...

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 27, 2019:

@KKGator True, because it's not just Citizen's United to overturn. There is also Buckley v. Valeo from the 1970s. That one ruled that money equaled free speech.

I find this to be quite representative of the "Dating Experience" here on Agnostic.

MarkiusMahamius comments on Sep 26, 2019:

you mean stuff thats completely made up?

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 26, 2019:

@MarkiusMahamius I guess only LH knows for sure, and I really don't care what she says or thinks anymore.

I find this to be quite representative of the "Dating Experience" here on Agnostic.

MarkiusMahamius comments on Sep 26, 2019:

you mean stuff thats completely made up?

TomMcGiverin replies on Sep 26, 2019:

I have always considered that possibility. Another reason I blocked her.

[consumer.