PPP.

Wildflower comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I prefer the "other furry beast"...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

An affectionate water buffalo.

The grand plan.

glennlab comments on Apr 12, 2019:

bless the pig first.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

If, like they do here in South Carolina, you're cooking the WHOLE pig it'll take all day.

This is so me, how about you?

Wangobango3 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Being in a loving relationship is priceless. Being home alone is not.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Considering the singles group, it's a hard sell to those with ex-husbands and aren't up to trying that again. They'll bite your head off to suggest it.

This is so me, how about you?

bobwjr comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Well maybe prefer to be on a date with good women

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

"**women**? I like the cut of your gibberish.

Will Drumpf hand over tax returns or drop out of the race or declare martial law? [thehill.com]

wordywalt comments on Apr 12, 2019:

It will go to the Supreme Court. If the court ru;es against him, he will be forced to hand them over. By the way, it is martial law, not "Marshall Law." Even he is not dumb enough to declare martial law. He would be imprisoned for that.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

If it was declared, he'd be a dictator. After that, arrest warrants are useless.

Will Drumpf hand over tax returns or drop out of the race or declare martial law? [thehill.com]

genessa comments on Apr 12, 2019:

i sit somewhat corrected in that while the house ways and means committee order is not to him, some states are refusing to put him on the 2020 ballot if he doesn't turn them over himself. ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Stay seated. >some states are refusing to put him on the 2020 ballot What your source says is there are 17 states with **pending** legislation to keeping him off the ballot if he doesn't turn over his tax report.

Will Drumpf hand over tax returns or drop out of the race or declare martial law? [thehill.com]

DharmaBum50 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I'm not a betting person, but if I were, I'd put my money on martial law....

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

First, I want to know who's your bookie? I'd put money on it as well. The odds are nobody believed Michael Moore when he said "You have elected your **last** president." Nobody believed him when he said Trump would win the election **either.**

Will Drumpf hand over tax returns or drop out of the race or declare martial law? [thehill.com]

Ragamuffin comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Yes, he will turn over his tax returns. He will have no choice once they are subpoenaed. No, he won't drop out of the race but it's conceivable that he could lose the Republican primary. No, he can't declare martial law unilaterally, nor would the Joint Chiefs obey an unconstitutional or unlawful...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

>an unconstitutional or unlawful order. 1) There isn't anything about martial law in the constitution. 2) There isn't anything about martial law in the Uniform Military Code of Justice (UMCJ). 3) In the UMCJ, it says the commander in chief is always in charge unless he's violating the UMCJ. **Insignificant detail**: I hate the UMCJ. For all times, all places, the military follows whoever pays them.

The grand plan.

Ludo comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Not so much a blessing as "saying grace".

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

One time I was asked to say grace. I said "Grace, let's eat."

One for the member who blocked all the other members who tried to explain to her that the earth is ...

freedom41 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

It's really sad that there is people that think the Earth is flat. I didn't know there was people still living in the 15th century.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Believe, honey child, BELIEVE!

Send them to Nancy.

Freedompath comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Trump is a DANGEROUS man...end of story!

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

You think that'll shut 'em up? Any time I hear "end of story" in politics, people keep talking.

Send them to Nancy.

Charliesey comments on Apr 12, 2019:

What I don’t understand is when was he ever broke?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

I understand he's lying. To him "broke" means when his cash assets are under a billion.

Romantic lighting

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Great effect. I'm gonna try it.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@SiouxcitySue I had considered using cable ties. What stopped me was when I realized how long I could hold my hands above my head without getting uncomfortable.

CHROMOSOMES(to help understand zygote and the new 6 week fertilized zygote as human).

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

What? You've never heard of the phrase "fucking idiots?" I can't see them visiting this site to enlarge their vocabulary.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@aahouck49 I have discovered illiterate seniors attending high school. It's the "no child left behind" policy coupled with pedagogical mythology: "We don't have any stupid kids." Part of that is we insist on textbooks so boring we get students with a fear and resistance to reading by the 3rd grade. After that, they're left behind. Stop me before I write the nine pound essay about what's wrong with American education.

Very romantic

brentan comments on Apr 12, 2019:

It's the thought that counts.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@SiouxcitySue Loved and lonesome isn't a **good** result.

The forecast

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Lucky is as lucky does.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Ho, ho, Lucky Pierre!

Romantic lighting

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Great effect. I'm gonna try it.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

I want to know how you'll SUCCESSFULLY secure the glow sticks to the fan blades. Get back to me.

When people try my espresso, I hear:

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I heard the same thing after someone tried my bulletproof coffee made with chicory. They have no taste.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

The **only** place I've had coffee with chicory is in New Orlean's French quarter, at a cafe famous for serving square doughnuts with eight layers of powered sugar. Their coffee is ultra bitter.

Bluffton SC, about a half hour from Savannah, GA roughly an hour and a 1/2 from Charleston.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

Buffton, SC is for those who can't afford Hilton Head, which is almost next door.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch The old wealthy white guys of Hilton Head come with giggling youthful trophy wives. I have a gal that wants me to take there. I've never been. It sounded like the place of the uber wealthy to get overpriced **everything.** Maybe she wants to trade up to a sugar daddy. Don't know. These days she wants to run off to Charleston to catch the next the cruise ship to the Caribbean. She's willing to settle seeing Fort Sumter and their aquarium.

People who have been single too long are.....

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 12, 2019:

I can really agree with this. Having a man in your life might as be like having a 6 foot toddler. Piss on the toilet seat. Dropped laundry everywhere. I want this?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

I do all of Petunia's laundry and we have separate bathrooms. She throws her clothes **every where** and complains I hang them up in the wrong place. Wanta trade?

His hero!!.... Bigly!

BohoHeathen comments on Apr 11, 2019:

They are one in the same. It’s scary that people still blindly follow him. Honestly we should never blindly follow any politician, but Trump is a nazi con

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Hey! At least Hitler wasn't a draft dodger.

Still makes me laugh.

metalhead222 comments on Apr 12, 2019:

thats not a oven lol

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Picky, picky, picky.

Bluffton SC, about a half hour from Savannah, GA roughly an hour and a 1/2 from Charleston.

sweetcharlotte comments on Apr 6, 2019:

OK, I didn't realize it was that close to GA. I've never been to any of those 3 cities.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

Even better chance you've never been to Seneca, SC, which is 30 minutes to Georgia state line. Give me another 15 minutes, I'll be in North Carolina. The area is called by the C of C, the golden triangle. According to moonshiner, Col. Redmond it's called dismal corners. It's completely neglected by tourists. It does have over mountain waterfall hikes and several huge muddy alpine lakes. The lakes are the result of hydroelectric dams. When the dams went up, several small cities went underwater. While you can scuba dive and see them, you won't see much of them because of limited visibility in those muddy waters. The fun thing to do is the white water rafting. They filmed Deliverance here. Every year they celebrate the anal rapes of the Yankees in the movie. I kid you not. They hate outsiders here. When I open my mouth and my southern drawl isn't nasal, I hear the locals say "Jew t'ain't from around cheer, are you?" The touristy part of NC/SC Carolina is along the Atlantic Ocean. Party cities are always along an ocean. ? See Myrtle Beach, SC, during spring break. On the other extreme, I spent a week on the Outer Banks and three days to realize that was mistake. I did see a live time's worth of light houses. Every single one of them wouldn't let visitors climb to the top and take in a view.

Trump says he doesn't know about WikiLeaks. Here's a tweet from Januray 4, 2017

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I'm not discounting what he says, I just don't like what he did. I have lost respect for the media and have cut down my news addiction to about 1 hour a day. trump is truly manipulating just about everything on the news, except for FSTV.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@JohnSchindler Thanks for the tip. I love all the hyper links on the Drudge Report although I can't stand the actual report, which is for right wingers.

This just in from the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

GeorgeRocheleau comments on Apr 11, 2019:

$1k? That will be fine.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 12, 2019:

@Surfpirate I used to say you can steal more money with a ball point pen than you can with a gun. Now it's with mouse clicks.

This just in from the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

GeorgeRocheleau comments on Apr 11, 2019:

$1k? That will be fine.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Surfpirate Most liquor store customers pay in CASH. As a result, the owners tend to have more cash at easy reach than the typical bank teller. Bank tellers are more likely to use silent alarms and put dye bombs in the sack. Here in the states, a third of the gross national product moves on a digital network called the fed wire **per day.**. Now if you can hack into that as a bank employee and transfer a few hundred million to a diamond broker, you can fit it all in your pocket.

And, it’s gluten free?

bookofmorons comments on Apr 11, 2019:

sadly those who need it most rarely take it

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

Hung around enough loud mouth drunks yet?

Please support FFRF.

TheDoubter comments on Apr 11, 2019:

i'm a nonbeliever

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@TheDoubter W. C. Fields said "*Everybody has to believe in **something.** I believe I'll have another beer.*"

This just in from the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

GeorgeRocheleau comments on Apr 11, 2019:

$1k? That will be fine.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Surfpirate Dam straight! Rob the liquor store.

Cats get it.

Ludo comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Of course not. Cats think they ARE gods.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

In ancient Egypt cats were treated as gods. They've never gotten over it.

William Barr Accidentally Concedes His Reason for Withholding the Mueller Report Is Baloney By ...

Tomaf comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I am confounded. :-P Even before Barr got ahold of the Mueller Report, the Dem politicians and pundits etc have been saying that if Barr does not release the entire thing, unredacted, there are plenty of ways that Congress can get ahold of it themselves, unredacted, but now they are going on a two ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@altschmerz Representative democracy means the idiots vote for their own. They're well represented.

Seems plausible

OldGoat43 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Remember Whoopi Goldberg and when she tried deciphering Jumpin Jack Flash?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

No. Do tell me more.

Please support FFRF.

TheDoubter comments on Apr 11, 2019:

i'm a nonbeliever

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

Shameless! Are there more like you? 🤫🙄😲

I have set myself the goal of completing the Triple Crown of American through-hiking.

AncientNight comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Good luck! You'll need a lot of stamina and several pairs of Hiking Boots. I've never been that far West before, except for being in Yuma AZ when the Squadron I was in when I was in the Marines went there for the pilots training. This coming Summer, I'll be taking an extended Road Trip across the ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

Are you going to stop for hikes on the Grand Stairwell?

Good morning and happy Thursday, all you lovely people!

MrLizard comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I want that cappuccino.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

Come and get it -- for free. All you got to do is darken my door step. I make all the fancy Dan coffees with Maxwell House or Cafe Busto (my favorite brand for espresso). It's what keeps Petunia out of Starbucks.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez calls out GOP “rhetoric” after Ohio group calls her a “domestic ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

Get out the baby Trump blimp and call him bat shit crazy.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Freedompath Poor in America is a felony offense because the poor can't afford a lawyer. Typically if you've served your time, you'll have to commit a crime because nobody wants to hire you. It gets worse when they have for profit prison. That's the assumption if you were arrested you'll be railroaded into prison because the criminal justice system gets a kick back. It does get worse. If the cops catch you with plenty of money, they'll take it, claiming you must have committed a crime and force you to pay for the law suit with the money you don't have to get your money back. When I hear "If you don't love it, leave it" I ask for the moving expenses. So far I got $5. They got the mouth but they don't have the money. I wonder why I'm in this country.

North Dakota may be the least visited state in the Union, but there are pretty sunrises here.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

It's the 46th least visited state. Least visited state is Nebraska, next (shockingly) is Delware and Iowa. Where the population density is less than one per acre with freezing wind and featureless great plains, I can see nobody wanting to visit. If high point of the day is the sun rise . . .?...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Haemish1 A couple of years ago I kept hearing about a great plains state that would pay people to move there if they stayed for five years. They were almost buying them a house to stay.

North Dakota may be the least visited state in the Union, but there are pretty sunrises here.

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

It's the 46th least visited state. Least visited state is Nebraska, next (shockingly) is Delware and Iowa. Where the population density is less than one per acre with freezing wind and featureless great plains, I can see nobody wanting to visit. If high point of the day is the sun rise . . .?...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Haemish1 North Dakota has to beg oil field workers to come. Major reason: lack of housing.

William Barr Accidentally Concedes His Reason for Withholding the Mueller Report Is Baloney By ...

Tomaf comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I am confounded. :-P Even before Barr got ahold of the Mueller Report, the Dem politicians and pundits etc have been saying that if Barr does not release the entire thing, unredacted, there are plenty of ways that Congress can get ahold of it themselves, unredacted, but now they are going on a two ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

A political scandal a month or two before the election can have crippling effects. American voters have short attention spans. That's why the Democrats don't want it released **immediately.**

William Barr Accidentally Concedes His Reason for Withholding the Mueller Report Is Baloney By ...

of-the-mountain comments on Apr 11, 2019:

The republicans are pure Fascists protecting one another! Mueller, just like Barr now are putting a Soft angle and touch to this to protect their pimped our criminal leader. These republican Fascists by the hand of their wealthy owners and their corporations will never allow a version that ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

I've heard this crap way too often from the *everybody I don't like is a Nazi* crowd. >The people of 1933 Germany had the rule of law and a Constitution! Where they using the **American constitution**?

North Dakota may be the least visited state in the Union, but there are pretty sunrises here.

AmmaRE007 comments on Apr 11, 2019:

I have visited N. Dakota !

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

Stay long or got seriously lost?

North Dakota may be the least visited state in the Union, but there are pretty sunrises here.

ShadowAmicus comments on Apr 11, 2019:

That is well worth waking to see.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

After that, shoot your travel agent.

This is a honey bee.

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Weeds look enough like grass if you mow enough...and you don't need to poison the earth.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch If harvested correctly, dandelions are good eats.

Fired staffers outnumber...

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 10, 2019:

That should make him happy, he's first at something. Question is Who fired them, not the tantrum boy I'll bet.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

If your boss throws a fit because you won't break federal laws, it's time to move on.

You may be cool ...

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I'm so cool, you could store meat inside of me -- A former president of the galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@EricTrommater Which head? The talking one. The other one doesn't talk.

Smart rooster?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Petunia told me her ideal weekend once we were married was to swap dirty jokes. The hunt for dirty jokes for me is sometimes fruitless. She immediately abandoned all hope. Thank you for assisting my married bliss.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 11, 2019:

@Livinlife One of my favorites is a farmer buys a new rooster for his farm. The old rooster takes the new one aside and says "Look, you can have these hens. I'm ready to retire. However, if I don't *pretend* to put up a fight they'll peck me to death. So chase me around the coop a few times, okay?" With that the new rooster starts after the old one. They circle the coop once, twice, three times and **boom** a shot rings out. The farmer puts down his gun and says "Dam. Three roosters this week. All of them gay."

11:09 A drunk calls me from Spartanburg, SC.

Ragamuffin comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Who was this guy? Apart from being drunk...he must be so much more than that...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

@Ragamuffin Back then you had to pay extra for a new phone number.

Dear Singles last night I posted something that was unkind and very ungallant.

TheDoubter comments on Apr 10, 2019:

let's see what they say

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

They are buying him drinks.

This would be a good feature to have.

IamNobody comments on Apr 10, 2019:

To block or not to block...that is the question

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

> To unblock you they should have to send a unblock request to you. Naw. The overall rule is I get blocked so they can say nasty things about me without worrying about my retorts. It's common for it to backfire on them.

How many of us Hikers have been instructed in, or practice orienteering? @Literatehiker?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Moss grows on the shady side of the tree.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

For a more on getting around without a compass see: "Camping for adults in Dixie (no children) Group"

11:09 A drunk calls me from Spartanburg, SC.

Ragamuffin comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Who was this guy? Apart from being drunk...he must be so much more than that...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

Don't know. He didn't leave his name or street address. I do know he slurred his speech which lead me to believe he was drunk. As others said in here, drunks get lonesome and want to talk. Therefore my assumption because of his drunkenness, he dialed the wrong number and got me. TWICE! Because I don't want him to call me back **again** I've blocked getting future calls from him. Back in the days before cell phones, my phone number was one digit away from being the phone number of the Pizza Hut. Therefore I'd get calls for Pizza Hut. Those calls went like this: "Pizza Hut --- "White guy? We don't serve white guys. We just butt fuck their lose ass women with coke bottles to hear 'em scream. Yo moma got a coke bottle stuck in her ass?" After working them up into a screaming rage, I'd tell 'em to come on down. Tell them Leroy sent you. Took Pizza Hut six months before they changed their phone number. People would walk in, planning to shoot up the place and wondering why they had all those white people in there. Tell 'em Leroy sent you.

How many of us Hikers have been instructed in, or practice orienteering? @Literatehiker?

WonderWartHog99 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Moss grows on the shady side of the tree.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

@bigpawbullets I mountain backpack. Mountains have this annoying habit of blocking radio signals such as cell phone calls and GPS. First time I reached a Smoky Mountains campground (Smokemount), I hit the radio's search button. Master plan: I didn't want to miss my favorite weekend radio show on NPR. # No radio stations on the dial. The battery powered TV? Forget it. Then Petunia tried to call her dad and let him know we'd arrived. # Best bet for not getting lost: sighting compass, a watch and a map. With a landmark (i.e. another mountain), not only can you tell where you are, you can tell with multiple triangulation, how long it'll take you to get there.

11:09 A drunk calls me from Spartanburg, SC.

Boxdoc comments on Apr 10, 2019:

I have 2 phones. A prepaid burner by my bed for emergency use. My kids are the only ones with the number. My main phone is in another room on the charger. Nothing worse than getting woke up by a BS phone call.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

>My kids are the only ones with the number It won't help. People can dial the wrong number in the middle of the night anyway and **still** get you. Dial? Who still uses a rotary phone any more?

Went out by myself tonight.

Agamic comments on Feb 15, 2019:

Wow, I go out on my weekends off work, but meeting others never happens to me. ☹️

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

@Agamic Women who wait for their prince to come wind up with a dog named prince who comes when called. Same story for guys.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch A decent flat head screwdriver will work in a pinch. All my screwdrivers are indecent. They're NEEKIID! Besides, I've got three oyster knives that work much better. One reason for the surplus is when I have enough oysters to share, I share my surplus oyster knives. I'm not a speed shucker. If I want to eat oysters I can't shuck them for friends and myself. One of the things I loved about Savannah was their abundance of parks with shady oak trees loaded with Spanish moss, which is neither Spanish or moss. It made up for their shortage of parking space on city streets. Fairly good public transportation, unlike the typical small town America. When I got off the bus, there was a shady park to walk off the bus route. The city is considered the most haunted city in America. A high percentage of graves have been disturbed or not in a graveyard. Chunk your dead slave to the nearest hole in the ground. The most haunted graveyard is the *Garden of Good and Evil." It's closed after dark and they've moved the *Bird Girl* statue on the book cover to a art museum.

Good Morning all.

Wangobango3 comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Kinda like Highschool, at times.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

I've been to school. I've been high. Not the same.

Good Morning all.

bigpawbullets comments on Apr 10, 2019:

The Drama! The Excitement! The Agnostic.com Show!!!!

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

Meh. The whiner side show. Somebody, nameless people named *you know who* named me, told lies about me and now I'm going to have a wild flaming hissy fit and a 'n' baby. You know, 'n' the letter that shall not be named. Dam Nashville all to hell. It's always a characteristic whine of *some* woman with a name. Never a guy. The guy's whine is "I got my butt kicked off of [fill in the blank here] forum and youse guys ought to give her hell until she lets me back on." "Women. Can't live with them. Pass the beer nuts." -- Norm from Cheers.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch Gullah Geechee is a culture I haven't encountered in person. I know their history but like Hilton Head, never ventured upon their island. Here the locals would stab themselves if presented them with an oyster knife and a sack of oysters. One learns oyster shunking skill painfully. There are no raw bars (topless oysters served raw) here in Seneca. Most locals refuse to eat them. I miss the days in Florida when I could snorkel in the oyster reef and bring back $60 worth of oysters for **free.** Ah, to rip open a living sewage sucker, cut its guts out and down my gullet to it could die in screaming agony is a tale that makes the locals bug eyed. In the meantime, I wonder where I last stashed my three oyster knives. Not that I need them here.

11:09 A drunk calls me from Spartanburg, SC.

Count_Viceroy comments on Apr 10, 2019:

Dude. I just wanted to talk.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 10, 2019:

Arg, I send the minions of hell to fester among you.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch The waving girl struck out and her light house went underwater. Her lighthouse is still operational but nobody lives there. We went past it on the dolphin tour One of the big things for us is we can't get **fresh** seafood in Seneca. It's all frozen seafood here. One *could* bring a worm to the local lakes where the fishing is poor and water is polluted. At a seafood shack on Tybe Island's Crab Shack, I made sure to pet the alligators at the shack. I ordered their mud bugs (crayfish). Petunia wants to go all the way to Florida for their oysters. The best oysters we've ever had come from a small town in the Big Bend area of Florida, Apalachicola. Don't you mean Prince of **Tides?**

Ugh! I'm so mad.

Nukdookum comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Some people don't get it. All humans deserve respect and dignity. Whether you agree with their life choices or not.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Nukdookum I still need to treat everyone as a person. Including those who'd feed you to the wood chipper on a whim?

JIGGERY-POKERY.

TheDoubter comments on Apr 9, 2019:

A case of Brits learning from the Scots?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Marionville I've gotten in no end of problems making this claim: ....but can also be English, Scottish, Welsh or Northern Irish. “Brits” is a term that can mean any and all of us.

Ugh! I'm so mad.

PalacinkyPDX comments on Apr 9, 2019:

You mean like they often do on here? Dear Meme group, ridiculing how people look (and I'm not talking about public figures) isn't being outrageous, progressive or having a "biting sense of humor"... it's being a jackass, fatphobic, transphobic and, most often a pathetic, insecure little turd.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Cabsmom but to make fun of someone is just plain UGLY. Considering I make fun of my own looks, does that make me extraordinarily ugly?

Ugh! I'm so mad.

Nukdookum comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Some people don't get it. All humans deserve respect and dignity. Whether you agree with their life choices or not.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Nukdookum It is never ok to treat another human being like an animal. Humans **are** animals, including the smug animals.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch Back during my days of driving ten hours to go mountain backpacking, I had eczema on my hand. About every hour, I'd rub a coal tar preparation on it to keep it moist. Worked by the time I reached the third state line. >Seneca is a serious trot from here. A year ago I was in the area, beating feet on River Street, Savannah, SC with a minor side trip to Tybe Island. Terribly romantic area. There is so much history behind her, I had to take a picture of the waving girl.

Ugh! I'm so mad.

Nukdookum comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Some people don't get it. All humans deserve respect and dignity. Whether you agree with their life choices or not.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

>All humans deserve respect and dignity. You are reminding me of my ex-biz partner (may the parole board be turning him down now). One time we were delivering an order of firewood in a upscale residential neighborhood. The buyer came out to meet us with his three year old daughter and his yappie dog. Gary told him he didn't know which he'd rather fuck, his daughter or his dog. He was being **serious.** A repeat order did not follow. He was in jail serving time for attempted rape, sodomizing an eight year old boy and assault when he decided to tell his cell mates about the time he beat is ex-wife to death. They turned states evidence. I went to his week long trial. Luckily for him, they didn't mention the time before that he left 37 stab wounds in his girl friend. She lived and he served 18 months. That trial was the last time I saw him. He tried to buddy up with me during the trial but seeing the members of his ex-wife's family present and those cops dedicated to find more witness to testify against him, I decided against it. I could curl you spine with some of the things that guy did. >That doesn't give us permission to treat anyone poorly. I know a crowd of people who'd disagree. Give Pensacola's LBGT community a chance they'd feed him to the wood chipper. He's the only person I've ever heard of who was thrown out of four court ordered alcohol abuse treatment facilities.

Those snails are dicks

Kynlei comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Geoduck (pronounced gooey-duck, for some reason) are actually clams. Yes, they are edible. I, for one, will not be going there, though!

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Zoohome Now you're heading for dangerous regions.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch I'll keep your offer under serious consideration. Have you tried coal tar on your shin?

Trump told border patrol agents to defy law, block migrants: CNN [thehill.com]

Redheadedgammy comments on Apr 9, 2019:

He breaks the law every day, so why shouldn't everyone who works for him?????

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

If you're a member of Trump's cabinet you're get a hefty salary **and** a crack at well paying lobbying jobs once you leave office for ignoring Trump's illegal orders. >He breaks the law every day, so why shouldn't everyone who works for him????? Because Trump isn't whipping out pardons left and right. He isn't loyal to his own people.

Those snails are dicks

Kynlei comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Geoduck (pronounced gooey-duck, for some reason) are actually clams. Yes, they are edible. I, for one, will not be going there, though!

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Zoohome It gets worse. When picked up they ejaculate salt water. Even worse they're expensive and rarely available on the east coast of the US.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I am not a fragile creature.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch Ah's a white guy Miss Daisy, although I've met Hispanics who thought differently, babbling on in incomprehensible rapid fire Spanish, thinking they'd met me before.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@BufftonBeotch Want to do a pedicure again? Last person that gave (I paid for it) me a pedicure did it so badly there were bandages on my toes. He was a foot doctor.

It's time to worry.

GwenBFree comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Where’s the creepy emoji when you need it?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

It's over here: ???

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Aryn because the military has no law or regulation to stop his incompetent leadership, treason or his selling of secrets to the enemy. Whoa, gal. In countries where the military **can** replace their president, it's called a military dictatorship. What we have in this country is the dreaded "federal case." It takes a long time to build one of those before the feds are dam sure their criminal won't be found innocent. What we've been seeing is people (mostly Republicans) who mistake "president" for "king" and insist a king can't get arrested in office. There are a lot of names for those idiots.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

MsHoliday comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Yes it sure is.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@MsHoliday Many women have been assaulted on public transit Name six. Off hand I haven't seen any police statistics on women getting attacked on the bus. This gives me the impression while it does happen, it's not common.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

Anonbene comments on Apr 9, 2019:

In the olden days every guy would pick up a female at her door and drive her out on a date. Times sure have changed.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Anonbene Naw, back then a guy knew his first date because they enjoyed each other's company from school, civic organizations, work, they lived nearby . . . .. The first date helped answer the question, "Do I want to know them **better**?

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I'd meet at a restaurant. How else are you going to have a first date?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

>How else are you going to have a first date? I don't want to count the ways. Most dating gurus say coffee shop.That limits time the date will go on. How long does it take to realize the date is a poorly dressed boorish lout? I like strolling in large lavish formal gardens. They have plenty of people around if she wants to grab and frisk me. Because I garden, I want to see if they can grow different plants. Movie and dinner. Public beach. Picnic in a park. Art museum. Cheap drinks on lady's night at the bar. The major factor in all of these is there will be **other people** around and you won't be isolated with your date.

When someone you've never met asks if you want to meet at the restaurant or meet somewhere else and ...

BufftonBeotch comments on Apr 9, 2019:

I am not a fragile creature.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

I love tough old women, especially if they have a strong back for romantic overnight backpacking trips. Not that backpacking is my idea of a **first** date. Young women would do. ??

Apparently not everyone thinks this is romantic. My bad.

Kynlei comments on Apr 8, 2019:

In what world is "booong" the sound of a fart?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

If you don't know, you're having a happy life.

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

@Aryn Then what's to stop a corrupt commander from ordering a squadron into a pointless death? No one is required to serve under an incompetent or insane commander. You have not yet been told the terrible truth. I know this because you still laugh. There are too many battles where commanders ordered their troops into **absolute certain death.** To me the most famous was celebrated in a poem "Onward rode the 600 hundred." They were ordered into heavily fortified valley by a commander who wasn't on the scene. **Absolute certain death.** Same story in battles in the US. Picken's charge comes to mind. Afterwards he told his commanding officer, "General I have no troops." The phrase "cannon folder" means they were ordered to their **absolute certain death.** Us warthogs are highly valued for this purpose because as large lumbering creatures we do a fine job of catching the other side's bullets. Why would anyone follow orders to **absolute certain death?** Because if they disobey orders, they'll get shot for treason and die in disgrace. Appeals to reason will have no effect. Go ahead. Try to laugh now.

And not even as much money as he likes to claim

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 9, 2019:

You forgot the part about a really good prenup.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

After he dies, she can contest the prenup and it's likely she'd win.

And so it goes....

SiouxcitySue comments on Apr 9, 2019:

Well what single person of either gender hasn't encountered this. I eat my foot regularly, probably why I don't get many dates.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

I am too polite to offer alternative theories about your dating history.

History of America

metalhead222 comments on Apr 8, 2019:

our future

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 9, 2019:

Gasp! That's where I hide the bodies. What made you go looking?

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Aryn The DoD has the ability to stop him for his treasonous behaviors . . . Members of the Dod take an oath that says they will follow all LEGAL orders, not to report the illegal orders. If they get an illegal order, they're free to ignore it. While I was in the navy, a commissioned officer gave me an illegal order to desert. I told him to put it in writing. He refused. Otherwise, the military **demands** loyalty to superior officers, especially the commander in chief. Turning them over to law enforcement agents for arrest means a short military career. My master plan with the commission officer was if I was getting out of the navy for following an illegal order, he was coming with me.

[yahoo.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Found this a few minutes ago.... Under Title 18, Section 3056, of the United States Code, agents and officers of the United States Secret Service can: Carry firearms Execute warrants issued under the laws of the United States Make arrests without warrants for any offense against the United ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@sassygirl3869 The reason for Trump's whirlwind change over in his administration is he demands loyalty to the point where they have to stay loyal to him by committing criminal acts. Dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

[yahoo.

ToolGuy comments on Apr 8, 2019:

He is always proving he is a tough guy!

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

Correction: he **talks** like a tough guy.

[yahoo.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Found this a few minutes ago.... Under Title 18, Section 3056, of the United States Code, agents and officers of the United States Secret Service can: Carry firearms Execute warrants issued under the laws of the United States Make arrests without warrants for any offense against the United ...

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@sassygirl3869 It's not **new.** The secret service was started at the end of Lincoln's term, July 5, 1865. Since then its official role has been enlarged for law enforcement. Trump would prefer they acted as the gestapo.

Is afraid of?????

Emerald comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Florida roaches are no joke.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Allamanda Don't count on her to measure the length of Caribbean cock roaches.

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Aryn Under Title 18, Section 3056, of the United States Code, agents and officers of the United States Secret Service can: >Carry firearms Okay. I spent three years in the US military. Never had to carry firearms. I was known to carry a soldering gun. Almost nobody on the ship shot anything except for the occasional missile. >Execute warrants issued under the laws of the United States Make arrests without warrants for any offense against the United States committed in their presence, or for any felony recognizable under the laws of the United States if they have reasonable grounds to believe that the person to be arrested has committed such felony Not the job of the DOD. On the other hands, you'll never see the secret service try to over throw a government. That's the DOD's job -- some of the time. The DOD doesn't do any law enforcement except with other members of the military. The secret service never invades a country. >The Secret Service works closely with the United States Attorney's Office in both protective and investigative matters. The DOD doesn't give a rat's patootie about the United States Attorney Office. The DOD's investigations are controlled by the Uniformed Military Code and civilians are rarely involved. That's what I said I was confused when the two were linked together.

History of America

EricTrommater comments on Apr 8, 2019:

https://youtu.be/mRkq595NhD0

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

Now people with cell phones can see it and dance.

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Aryn In contrast **most** of the Secret Service duties are to track down counterfeiters. Their better known duties is to provide with security for government events and body guards.

Is afraid of?????

Emerald comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Florida roaches are no joke.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Allamanda What is a one inch difference between friends? ??

Is afraid of?????

Emerald comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Florida roaches are no joke.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Allamanda come see the size of them in the Caribbean . . . I would but Petunia refuses to go couch serving in the Caribbean. Otherwise I'd be catching the next tramp steamer down there. > . . . where we call them 'Mahogany Birds'. What we're talking about here in Dixie are cockroaches that are up to three inches long. That's larger than our smaller birds.

Trump is removing US Secret Service director [cnn.

Aryn comments on Apr 8, 2019:

The DoD is responsible for this. They’re doing nothing, which means they’re complicit and the US is dead.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

Maybe it's personal density. I fail to see the link between the department of defense and the secret service. The two groups don't serve the same function. When he took office, Trump brought his own army of body guards.

That solved the problem

Babyoda comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Love it.Wouldn't that just make more noise with the gunshots and all?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

Who says they will believe you, a total stranger?

Blowin in the wind

altschmerz comments on Apr 7, 2019:

?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@altschmerz Just monkeying around ?????.

Is afraid of?????

azzow2 comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Have you ever seen a flying roach? I had seen one when I was in the Philippines. It was so big it covered the top of a glass.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@Sheannutt >Have you ever seen a flying roach? Indee do. Seeing a giant flying roach isn't as bad as dealing with the woman who also saw it. She'll get air borne out of the recliner and people in the next town hear her screams of "**KILL IT, KILL IT.**" The cat bounces off the walls and takes wild flying leaps trying to catch the roach. If Percy is successful, he eats the roach. Welcome to domestic chaos.

Is afraid of?????

Emerald comments on Apr 8, 2019:

Florida roaches are no joke.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@balou I've lived in **both** Texas and Florida. They're the same bug although Florida seems to have the larger ones living in leaf piles and mulch piles. Nothing like turning over the mulch pile and have **those** things coming after you.

Blowin in the wind

altschmerz comments on Apr 7, 2019:

?

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

@altschmerz The lyrics in the song "Living in sin with a safety pin" Hell, I just picked it because it was next to the paper clip. No reason. For no reason at all, here's a bunch of other ones: ????

Self control is strength.

MsHoliday comments on Apr 8, 2019:

I noticed it can drive others crazy.

WonderWartHog99 replies on Apr 8, 2019:

We need to take turns driving Petunia crazy. She flies off the handle for no reason at all.