WOW. I've been finding some judgmental posts and comments here about people's appearances and what they choose to put on their bodies. I thought we are an open-minded community. I don't care if people have a thousand piercings or tattoos on their bodies, they want to have beards to their knees, shave their heads, wear man buns, dress in kilts, whatever. I can understand the negative reactions if say they have a Nazi swastika tattooed on their foreheads or clothing that have slurs on them. But people who just want to express their individuality, creativity, and interests on their person, why would we need to be negative about it. If it's not something for you or it's not something you would do, can't you just not look, scroll by, or just walk away without having to post a comment?
The guy with tons of face piercings, he might be the most gentle and kind hearted person on the planet for all we know. I'm sure there are people who would find him attractive and would love him. The lady with the new tattoo is really excited and proud of her tattoo. I'm sure this was a decision she made with a lot of thought. She simply wants to express herself in her own way and chose a small colourful tattoo in a discreet location.
As for me, I have had to put up with judgmental nonsense all of my life. I am covered in tattoos and have had people make negative comments about them for no good reason. What have I ever done to them? I enjoy my tattoos and am proud of all of them. I love wearing a fancy sleeveless ball gown so I can display my tattoos at a formal event. Especially because I'm a woman, I get comments that women should not have tattoos. It's the same when I have short hair. Oh, women are better with long hair. Or, women should be in a dress or skirt. Heck, I thought we are way past those outdated ideas for a very long time. I have even been told by a man that he likes me because I'm Asian. He says Asian women are submissive. Whoa!!! Anyhow, I have a job (all my coworkers have tattoos), I have enough friends (most have tattoos and piercings anyway) and I have plenty who love me despite or because of my tattoos (even if they don't have tattoos themselves), thank you.
I guess what I'm saying is, you might have a different opinion about something someone chooses to have done to their bodies or to wear but may be think about it before voicing it. Is it necessary to do so? The lovely lady with the tattoo wants to enjoy her first one and shares this joy with all of us. We don't need to ruin it with opinions about tattoos that she never asked for.
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10 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I am still a crochety old bastage so I will respond "what?" and "get off my damn lawn!"
meddling kids!!
JeffMesser
Level 8
June 23, 2018
1
If you put something out in front of thirty thousand strangers you have be prepared for a variation in response because we don't all think alike.
For me, a tattoo or a piercing adds nothing to the natural beauty of a human body. If someone really doesn't want to hear that then they maybe they should post in a closed forum or simply block me. Of course, I don't have to opine at every opportunity, but this site is also a way for people to connect based on mutual likes and dislikes, so holding one's tongue is not always the way.
Gareth
Level 7
June 23, 2018
0
Beauty is not just superficial and some of us could look past the superficial to get to someone's inner beauty. True, this is a public forum but courtesy still plays a role when we all play together. Personally, I don't think your response was particularly negative. Like someone commented, the way some people commented let us know who to avoid in future conversations.
This forum, like most forums, isn't as open minded as any of us would think, but I guess that's what makes the world go 'round.
AzVixen52
Level 7
June 23, 2018
3
I was hoping it would be different. Some people here sound like they might as well be religious.
Lalo:
Religious people don't have a monopoly on bigotry.
I think I saw that post. (green tat?).
I don't remember any negativity but I am not part of the group, I was lead there by following a member.
Yep some don't know when to mind there own business or always degrade others. Thanks for sharing. Power to you!
Lukian
Level 8
June 22, 2018
2
These type of people that do all this judgment just suck, i have many people amongst my family that say that oh Women should not have Tattoos. I say who the Heck asked you! ? Women that have and get Tattoos are Beautiful, Tattoos often are totally misunderstood like alot of things that people that cast Judgement don't understand. And Cause they don't understand they do what they demonize it and call it evil. And i ask what Century are we in again.?! I feel your frustration here Graceylou.., Dont let them get to ya!
ScienceBill72
Level 7
June 22, 2018
2
You bet, thanks. Hey, I'm pretty tough. I can fend them off on my own, but it's nice to have support from friends, and even strangers. I just feel for other people I guess. I mean, don't ruin somebody's joy by posting your negative view, when your opinion is not asked. No, I don't mean you in particular (I know you would not do that). I mean, they can just say, it's not for me, but I'm happy for you.
@graceylou People who make these type of comments whether they are here or in Public are negative and mean and get their kicks out of starting crap for no reason at all , if it isnt Body art, music, how some dresses , hairstyle, and movie views. Unfortunately there are many people's like this in our world. Oh and i forgot the religious people who are some of the most negative and cruelest people around at times. I like giving friends my support!
@ScienceBill72 You are right about the religious people for sure. They use god as their defense which to them is impossible to question. There's too much hate in this world. I might be naive enough to want to focus on the joys. I'm not a naive person and I'm aware of realities. When I see/meet someone, and I might not like something about their appearance, I would find something about them I like and comment on that instead.
@graceylou yes Exactly right instead of saying something you don't like about someone, or they're attire, find a good thing you like and compliment that. Its like the saying if you don't have anything nice to say don't say nothing at all. I try my best to be Nice and give kind words as often as i can
Nice post @graceylou I find judgmental people very off-putting.
jujuofthesea
Level 7
June 22, 2018
3
Thanks. I'm sure I could be judgmental now and again. I'm human after all. Then again, I've been accused of accepting everything as long as you're not hurting anybody. I just felt that the person whose picture was being talked about could not defend and explain himself because he's not here.
I don’t have tattoos myself, but I think they are fucking cool!
tsacrey
Level 6
June 22, 2018
2
Thank you. For the most part, responses to tattoos (mine or otherwise) have been positive. I don't worry so much about whether someone likes tattoos or hates them. I'm more concerned about assumptions made about the person with tattoos.
Agreed, I usually don't find out if people are attractive or not until they open their mouth.
JazznBlues
Level 8
June 22, 2018
1
I wear my beliefs & opinions openly and boldly. Not to offend, but to remove the assholes from my life preemptively. Strangely enough, I convince my fair share to rethink their biases when I'm really just trying to defend my beliefs. I'm always kind of shocked when it happens.
I agree. But then again, self expression is self expression.
If the world is celebrating tattoos but someone doesn't think they're 'cool'... Do they have to keep quiet?
Does self expression only go one way?
If someone is deliberately using tattoos to broadcast themselves to the world, what is that saying about people who don't have tattoos?
When someone gets a tattoo with the intention of getting noticed, they are forcing my participation. It may be borne of narcissism, it may not. But either way, it is forcing my hand. They are presenting their image to me. And everyone has an opinion, a personal aesthetic, their own taste.
Let people have tattoos. No one should be discriminated against for tattoos or piercings. No one. But don't shout down those who don't like them.
Likewise. Someone once told me that my hair was too bright. That's fine. It's part of life.
But if someone actively asks for my opinion about their tattoo I will tell them what I think. And I would ask the OP. Have you never in your whole life criticised anyone's choice of hair, clothes and make up?
Ellatynemouth
Level 8
June 22, 2018
0
If someone asks for your opinion, that is a different thing. You are entitled to not like something. The person who posted the tattoo did not ask about whether other people liked tattoos or not. To tell her something like "I hate tattoos" or "it will look bad when you're older" isn't respectful of her post. May be that's just my opinion. There are also a lot of assumptions about tattoos and piercings (and other body modifications) and about the persons who have them. Tattoos and piercings are just superficial. There are more to the person than what is superficial.
I never said anything nasty.
I have a female friend who gets tattoos. She beams with pride and courts my opinion. I lie and tell her they're lovely. But in reality I think they're ugly.
If I were to be honest, I would be automatically cast as the bad guy. So I keep quiet.
@Ellatynemouth I never said you in particular said anything nasty.
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