Thank you all for the time,effort and great advice. I appreciate all of it. This is a great community, and am looking forward to being a bigger part in it.

Vodka

I have had a lot of tragedy and sadness in my life, but I have never suffered with depression, so I don't know how equipped I am to advise you, but I will give it a shot. One thing that might help is to be proactive about this illness. If you had a kidney stone or cancer, you would search out help, so it is important to address this also. If you have never had an evaluation by a therapist, I would say that is your first step. If you can get a diagnosis, you will have a starting point. If you can get in with a therapist, you could start addressing the cause of your depression. Sometimes it is a chemical imbalance in your brain and medication might help that, at least to help you start working on the root of the depression. I don't want to be judgmental, but, nothing in life will ever make you happy. You have to learn to be happy and content with yourself, then things outside of yourself will also give you happiness. Sometimes, people are unhappy, and feel hopeless, but if a person decides to work on the problem, they will become more hopeful. If you find things that are enjoyable, even if it is for a very short time, do it. If you can force yourself to get outside, walk, and watch, you may find some things of beauty that you may suddenly find yourself captivated, even if it is for a few minutes. If you are feeling like self harm, call a suicide helpline or go to an ER and ask for help. If you can afford therapy, seek it out. If you are broke with no insurance, go to a community clinic. I worked in one for 10 years and we offered counciling service. If you are physically unhealthy, get some help with that. Eat and drink healthy foods and fluids, get some excersize. If you are using drugs or alcohol, get some help for that. It is a long, difficult road to wellness, and takes commitment, but, don't be discouraged. It is possible. You are the only one who can do the work it takes. best of luck to you.

If you are clinically depressed it is good to do something constructive about it. I prefer TMG(tri-methyl-glycine) to antidepressant drugs. A sure sign that you are clinically depressed is if you wake up in the middle of the night feeling depressed.

As for life in general, you can only proceed forward from where you are, not from where you would like to be. Nietchze wrote "amor fati", love your fate. And golfer Bobby Jones wrote "Golf is the closest game to the game we call life. You get bad breaks from good shots; you get good breaks from bad shots - but you have to play the ball where it lies."

When I was a year older than you are I was unemployed and almost broke. Over the next several decades I started a successful career, married, and raised two children to become successful adults. If I can find some success in life, you probably can also. Stubborn perseverance is a most valuable trait. Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence.

I second the suggestions to exercise: yoga, swimming, hiking, drumming, or anything you find fun to break a sweat. Free your ass and your mind will follow, works both ways. Herb and music are very healing to my mind and “soul” as well. Also, watch this:

Just wondering if there's someone you can speak to, perhaps a counselor or therapist. There's no shame in being depressed or reaching out for help. I've struggled with depression on and off for many years, so I can speak a lot from my own experience. Also, there's a group on the site for mental health support, [agnostic.com]

Great question! I love comedy and music. I've also seen a psychiatrist and taken antidepressants for many years. I recommend all of these things. I think finding a woman that would really love me would help too. : ) Talk therapy with a professional psychologist also helped me immensely. Good luck. I hope you get to feeling better soon.

All I can say is you're not alone. I've been struggling for about the same amount of time. I wish you the best and hope you find a solution soon.

when bad things happen I know good things are about to happen.

I know it sounds trite, but exercise. Emotions are chemicals within your brain, exercise is designed to release chemicals within your brain that counteract the ones you're struggling with. I've done it and it works, I don't just mean take a jog or hit the gym once a week. I mean a real regimented workout schedule 5-6 days a week.

Exercise for myself is a means to stay physically AND emotionally healthy. A lot of other people don't need it for emotional health, but I do so I put in the work, and it works.

Try exercise and maybe yoga...
Read some Buddhist philosophy.. small things that may help...

Wow everyone else on here has given such wonderful advice I'm hard-pressed to find anything to add but one thing that I have found being someone who has suffered a lifetime of depression is I run a landscape maintenance service and after I go out and mow and trim at high speed for about 4 or 5 hours when I come home I am no longer depressed exercise is a wonderful balm for depression

I don't know if it will help. I think about things in a political context.

There will always be more people than jobs because of the Reserve Army Of Labour(Engels/Marx). It's deliberately planned unemployment, which is cruel. It's designed to keep inflation down.

It's easier said than done, but try not to define yourself by your employment status, but other things. We all have a right to live on this earth.

I'm sorry to hear about your depression. Two books that might help... A practical one - The Depression Cure by Dr Steve Illardi. Practical changes to your life can make a difference. Exercise, sunlight exposure, a good night's sleep etc. They all help.

The next book is a challenge to the big pharma narrative (which stipulates it's all just chemicals and not our lives that cause depression). This is Depression Delusion by Terry Lynch.

Finally, I'll link an article at the end of my comment, which might help you. It's the best article I've ever read on the subject.

Just talking openly about your depression will help other people, and if you're kind to other people, then the earth needs you. There are not enough.

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I've dealt with depression most of my adult life. The best two things that have help me in my struggle was to give up alcohol and find a good antidepressants. Those two things were a good 80% of helping me in my battle. The rest of the way I accomplish with attitude, I laugh regularly, I help other where ever I'm able and most of all I stay positive and surround myself with other positive people. Those are the things that helped me, but everyone is different, you have to work at it everyday no matter what you figure out and like any other skill it's hard at first but after awhile it becomes easier and easier until one day it's to the point where you don't have to think about it. Hang in there brother you got this. No matter the obstacles you can overcome.

I've dealt with a lifetime of depression. Antidepressants help, removing toxic people from your life helps, my fierce fighting spirit and my desire to see a better future helps, finding new hobbies helps

When I was down someone gave me a copy of “Help Yourself to Happiness” by Maxie Maultsby, and it did wonders for me,The book is very easy to read and understand. For me doing the exercises was like flipping a switch. I couldn’t afford a high-priced psychological counselor or a bunch of expensive pills and I’m glad I couldn’t.

Every bad feeling can be traced to an untrue thought. Every day of unhappiness, anger, or depression can be traced to wallowing in those thoughts.

Are you referring to the politics of the time? Something does seem to happen every day.

Try do stay engaged and to things even if it is small.

Take a walk around the neighborhood and pick up trash even.

Maybe volunteer at an animal shelter.

It's harder to feel hopeless if you are creating even the tiniest bit of it.

Maybe stop worrying about what others think about you. We're all essentially on our own in this life, whether we have a partner or not, so do what works for you. For a living, do whatever suits you, there are millions of contented manual workers in the world. Do the small things that work for you and you'll be happy. Be happy and you'll attract others to you who'll like you for who you are.