Overweight issues can have far reaching effects. I have a niece that is very overweight, about 300 lbs. who frequently horseback rides and I feel for the poor horse. Is this animal abuse?

I always take an example by the Buddhist monks who spend a lot of time sitting in meditation yet are not fat. We in the western world overeat by a ridiculous amount compared to them.

Probably being a good example would be better, like skip the couple of beers.

Three words: don't do it.

The only people who should be concerned about her weight are her and her doctor. You need to stay out of it. She doesn't need you to fat shame her under the guise of being concerned about her health.

Please don’t mention it. I guarantee that she is fully aware of her weight and the health risks associated with it. Let her doctor be the one to have those conversations with her and just stick to offering her your support and friendship.

I got a 30 day FB jail for calling dtrump an orange buffoon baboon

Probably best not to mention it, she probably feels bad enough already. Fat prejudice is sadly sill acceptable. Until the republicans bring back the others anyway.

You can, however, model behavior that is positive. When you have lunch with her, eat healthy. No refined carbs, no sugar etc. Weight loss is deceptively simple. Fiendishly hard, but simple.

As a person that weighs 300lbs, we know we're fat and we know it's unhealthy. Having a person whom you haven't seen in years telling us that will only get you removed from her life (if she was me).

Broaching something as personal as weight is not something a casual friend should do, and family should do cautiously. Most likely she is already struggling with what to do about it. If she brings it up, by all means give her what information you have, but until you are more than a casual friend, leave it be.

About gastric bypass/lapband/etc surgery..... she needs to think long and hard. The mortality rate is better than it was 30 years ago (my step son died after bypass surgery), but the side effects are, in my opinion not worth it. Also, unless you change your eating habits the bypass won't work anyway.

If you aren't willing to get into the trenches and do the work with her as a support system...there is nothing to say.

However, if you are willing to pick her up, take her to the gym with you or to the Y to go swimming, join an aerobics class with her, attend yoga classes with her, get her into an over-eaters counseling group and go with her for support, spend time in the kitchen with her making and eating healthy foods....then, by all means, offer your support and help.

She knows....she doesn't need told anymore. She needs REAL help.

A short story; My late wife was heavy most of her life,a few years ago looked at stomach reduction surgery as she kept getting heavier, at one time over 280 pounds for a 5' 4" frame is very heavy,so she did the surgery,lost weight,but being she was a smoker from High School stopping about 30 years ago felt good about it.

A complication set in, as her Doctor did not prescribe a long enough duration of a medication and she got the horrible infection "Cee-Dif" I believe it weakened her immune system, and the lung cancer got activated eventually taking her life. So if your friend mentions gastric bypass or reduction surgery,caution them please.......

I am not so sure that you could just bring up such a ‘sensitive’ matter to your school friend...like her weight! It may well be a major problem, but your friend may be harboring shame about herself and bringing it up, without some prior trust on her/your part, may hurt more than help! Encourageing her, for the person you know her to be...would be much more helpful.

I would suggest you say nothing. If you rekindle your friendship and become close friends, you might consider offering her support, certainly with the knee issues. But for right now, I'm pretty sure she knows her health issues better than you do.
While your motivations are sincere, you'll probably come off as a condescending, meddling, judgmental, know-it-all.

She is well aware of her size as it affects her health. Her doctors have told her more than once, other "loved ones" will tell her. She doesn't need a reminder from friends. If you want to be her friend, if the relationship is important to you don't mention it. She knows, she just doesn't want to address it with you. Sometimes we just need that friend who gives us peace.

Don't say anything.
As another poster has already pointed out, it's clear she's already seeing a doctor.
If she doesn't bring it up to you, it's not your place to say anything.
It's nice that you're concerned for her, but keep it to yourself unless asked.

If you're not close, I wouldn't. If this person is looking at a knee replacement the doctors are going to be mentioning all the same things that you would say anyway - and it is going to be better received than if it comes from a casual friend. Most likely it's nothing that this person doesn't know anyway. If you are truly concerned, I would be circumspect about it and steer the conversation towards more positive topics that are related. You can ask if they have any interest in new activities that would improve their health - such as water aerobics (no knee impact) or healthy meal recipes.... stuff like that. See if this person shows any interest in areas that would improve the situation and then help and encourage her to pursue them.

Don't its fck all to do with you she will know and probably just wanted a day with old friends not judgemental ones