Much older men with much younger women. What's the attraction? As for as being attracted to a much younger women for a man. Well that's just stating the obvious. But it seems these days women in their 20s are attracted to and are dating men 20 to 30 years older then they are. Why is that? Is it because they the man is established in the world and financially stabl? Not likely for most men. Are they looking for that daddy figure the never had? Is it because some men just seem to have a little bit better of a handle on life and are confident in their world? What are your thoughts?
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.Well I'm 44 so I'm not sure I'm qualified to answer but I do find myself attracted to men 10-15 years older than me. I generally (not always) find they are more mature and less selfish. They have some experience and seem to genuinely want to get to know me for more than just sex.
Marcie1974
Level 8
Aug 13, 2018
1
My feelings are; The young Men are influenced by Drugs,Alcohol,fast cars and loose women,if a young woman wants to start a family,she may pick an older man to father her children,the hormones have slowed down the urge to mate with every beautiful female,the downside,is even though men still produce sprm until the day we die,the increased chance of birth defects rises asa man ages. Autism,Spinal Bifida,and other afflictions.
Mike1947
Level 7
Aug 12, 2018
0
Often the women that get with older men are not interested in having children. But not always.
In traditional roles, men are looking for beauty and sex and women are looking for money, so it makes perfect sense. My grandmother married an old man when she was young and when he died she was financially set for life.
ldheinz
Level 7
Aug 12, 2018
1
Was the opposite for me-looked younger always dated younger after 2 divorces. Not long term. Now I'm with a whole man I met here and we are very happy.
sassygirl3869
Level 9
Aug 12, 2018
1
Couger
Lol. Maybe that goes hand in hand with why men my own age have zero interest in me. I have a good job, pay my own bills, own my own home. I'm not mercenary enough to make a man think I need him financially, even if I could use the help at times. But I look at it as a meeting of equals. Evidently , that isn't whats desired.
Such is life.
SallyInStitches
Level 7
Aug 12, 2018
2
Being roughly your age and in the same state, I had a look at your profile. Polyamorous isn't my preference, but that's just me.
@CallMeDave being poly had nothing to do with it. These , I'll call them situations as they didn't last long enough to be called barely acquaintances, never got to a point poly came into the conversation.. excuses given were I was "too busy" (with work), I wasn't "spontaneous" enough to come a 30+ drive in the middle of the work week after getting home to go out drinking, also something I don't do & I am very up front with that. Another was to expect to make plans in advance was just too hard. In other words, a lot of bs excuses. So I'm not their cup of tea, fine. I'm also not falling into bed on the first & probably not the 2nd date either, which was also given as an excuse which means he was just looking for a quick piece & moving on anyway. Fortunately, I tend to set up 1st meetings in a bookstore with a coffee shop so if things don't work out, its still a good night for me.
@SallyInStitches oh I misunderstood, and thought you meant men from this site.
@CallMeDave oh gawd no. Guys from this site have been great. Very accepting. I've had good conversation but great distance is an issue for meeting. These were padt forays on other "dating" sites & real life experience in my own backyard.
As a man, I can only say that dating someone of a wildly dissimilar age to me would make zero long term sense. Relationships are hard enough when there's not a big experience gap -- usually accompanied by a maturity gap and big differences in interests and priorities.
Every advantage you can posit for the female in such an arrangement cuts both ways. The man is more established and mature -- good for her. But the woman is less established and more immature. So the man gets to deal with her youthful angst and hubris, her taking herself too seriously, her inability to let things go, to fight fair, to spend responsibly, to have reasonable expectations. Most young women don't understand men their own age, much less men twice their age.
It's nuts. Full stop. End of story. No. Just no.
mordant
Level 8
Aug 12, 2018
1
Well I'm getting a devorce from a 50 yr old woman that exhibits all those negatives you just listed. So I don't necessarily agree with you.
Does it happen when the older man doesn't have a lot more money than the woman?
Stephanie99
Level 8
Aug 12, 2018
1
Yes.
@Sticks48 Could you give me an example? I only know of examples like George Clooney.
@Stephanie99 Me. When l was 42 l was married to a 24 yr. old, and she ask me. I was and am a professional musician without a lot of money.
@Sticks48 Maybe I should have mentioned fame. There is something about musicians.
Well, I've been single now for about 5 years, and I haven't experienced that, dammit. Although a woman friend of mine who is 35 is going with me to my 45th class reunion next week, just so we can freak everyone out.
Tomfoolery33
Level 9
Aug 12, 2018
1
Idk, I could never do that. Did have a gf who dumped my best friend for an anesthesiologist 20+ yrs her age when we were in our 20's. Money really did attract her. She was whacked on the guy.
It never made sense to me. She also had daddy issues.
Qualia
Level 8
Aug 12, 2018
0
Yup. Money, security, life style. Then have a couple of kids and devorce him and rape him for everything he's worked for. Unfortunately this story plays out far too often.
Read my post; is not daddy issues.
@Spag84 I think the gf really liked the guy. She wouldn't shut up about him, but being established vs my bf "just being a guitar player" and always broke ... But yeah, it never made sense to me since I couldn't do it. They tried to "fix me up" with his rich friend who was 20 yrs older and tried to kiss me with nicorette gum mouth.
At the time I just wanted my complete equal, broke or not.
@Spag84 Most women don't divorce lightly. There's a missing part in the equation in the premise "take him for everything he's worked for".
If she's taking a piece of your hide there's usually a reason. I'd run from any guy who speaks this way about an ex wife/GF. It screams "can't take responsibility for anything".
Baby boomers and millennials have both screwed up the world. They deserve each other.
NothinnXpreVails
Level 8
Aug 12, 2018
0
I'm Gen X. Millennials haven't really had a chance to do anything yet. It's the Baby Boomers, our parents who have done a lot of damage to this world. They call themselves the greatest generation. How is it they are the greatest generation. Just because they lived in a time of prosper in this country? But the one thing that they do not realize is that they caused a lot of the problems that Generation X and Millennials have to deal with now.
@Spag84 true, but millennials have a heavy influence on social aspects, especially with their lifetimes corresponding to the beginning of the cyber age
@NothinnXpreVails just set of an EMP and see who can handle living without power or internet.
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