Is it healthy/better in a relationship to share our respective shadows and triggers from our past with our partners and what we're doing to heal them? Or do you think it's better to keep this process to ourselves and our counselor/coach?
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I did disclose one thing to many and it has been used against me time and again. I didn't know any better then...I do now. You do the math
IamNobody
Level 8
Aug 23, 2018
0
@Akfishlady No, no noooooooo..... It was as simple as disclosing previous girlfriends existance and I got a lot of "are you still thinking about A or B or C????"..... F -me seven ways from Sunday !!!!! That crap eventually ruined everything as a couple. Violence??? Never ever.. we're still legally married but not a couple for over 10 years now. Ironically we are best friends than ever. Could that be possible had it been any type of violence? Mmmmmhhhh nope
@Akfishlady she always have been funny that way and I learned it the hard way. For the record, she is not a bad person by any means. Sometimes things just don't work, that's all there is to it.
It's always better in a relationship to hide things. Begin early a habit of separating your partner from your true emotions and let it evolve into hiding other things and eventually lying entirely.
In all seriousness, you don't need to beat them over the head with your past but when applicable it should be discussed. If it's a large concern for someone they should even make a little time to have a conversation about it. A good gauge is whether or not you feel like you're hiding it from them, if you do find a way to tell them.
mattersauce
Level 7
Aug 23, 2018
0
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