60/40
I read somewhere that most relationships are 60/40 not 50/50 on give/take
Do you believe this?
Do you think it fluctuates?
Are you more of the 60 (giver) or 40 ( taker)?
Be honest, no judgement.
I think it fluctuates - depending on a lot of issues that also tend to fluctuate over time (i.e. - who's putting in the most hours at work, etc). When I was a stay at home mom, I did a lot more than my 50% - as is the case now that I'm the one fully retired. If you find yourself "keeping score" - you just might have bigger issues than what percentage you give/take....???
@Crimson67 Yes, I get what you're saying about the emotional side of things and I do think that even that fluctuates over time....there are times when you feel closer to your partner than at some other times. Just a part of the human condition, I think. Most couples that I personally know have seen their own percentages/ratios change - back and forth - over many years.
I think that is fairly accurate. I believe you should always aim for the 50/50 but it can fluctuate and you should be flexible. In a nearly 30 marriage there were times I couldn't do my 50% and my husband picked up the slack until I was able to do my part. A few years later the reverse occurred. We can't always be on our A game and part of a partnership is picking up the slack when our partner needs it.
That was the financial settlement my second ex wanted, with her getting the 60%, even though we would have had nothing to settle if I hadn’t been putting money away. Final accord was pretty close to 55/45
I can't attest for "most" but for me those years were represented a 90,10 not healthy mix. Never again under those ratios.