I’m going to be completely honest. I’m not a lover of facial hair. I’m also fully aware how connected men are to their beards, mustaches and the like.. and that’s completely thier right. I would never ask someone to change that. She should never have accepted the date knowing that it was an issue. I’m sorry that happened to you.

I would never make a request like that before a first kiss. Good grief. What a sense of entitlement. Your body, your choice.

Seems like she's trying to get right to work with the task of transformimg you into exactly what she wants you to be. I'd drop her.

GOOD GRIEF! I'd drop it. That's just incredibly rude. I wonder what other ''requirements'' she has?

And, by the way, that's a nice-looking mini-beard. It's not as if you're "Grizzly Adams."

That's a horrible thing for her to say or do! How would she respond to being asked to cut her hair short in order for you to kiss her?

I think your look is very distinguished and would have no issues getting close to a man with it.

Nope. She is not a keeper. If she had a problem with it being too scratchy she could say so in a much different way. Rather rude.

She needs to accept you for who you are. I can imagine how hurt you are. I would think that she has an attitude problem-her way or the highway. May be a precursor of more to come?

Dump her. I am making some assumptions here. It sounds like this is a fairly new relationship. What I don't know is if this was a first date, but she saw your facial hair and made the decision to go out on a date and use you for a free meal...either this time or times before. Regardless, the audacity for her to dictate what you do with your body is outrageous....at any point in a relationship (also hypocritical). If she's that shallow, you need to take a good hard look at what the relationship dynamics would be later on. How much is she going to expect you to just give up for the 'honor' of her pussy? What if you put on some weight? What if you start loosing the rest of your hair? I can understand compromise in a relationship, but this sounds like feminine castration games. Hair on your chin is a pretty shallow gauge of determining if this person has character, honestly, loyalty, compassion, and a host of other traits that should be the focus on whether you want to be in a relationship with a person. She doesn't want to kiss you with it, fine...she is free to make that decision. She should have stepped up and went dutch on the bill then and told you not interested instead of being a manipulative coward.

I had almost the same problem but she wouldn't kiss me unless I first stopped being left handed...insisted that I sell my left-torium business and go to right handed conversion classes.

It's your choice,which is more important your facial hair or your new relationship is she worth it or do you feel like it's going to be a problem already

Your white mustache and goatee may have been too sharp and prickly for her. I've had men scratch my face with their sharp, rough facial hairs. It's painful.

As we get older, white hair is more coarse and frizzled than regular hair. Women's skin becomes more fragile.

Tired of being scratched, I prefer a clean-shaved man. My boyfriends thoughtfully shave before sex. I appreciate it.

Unless we are camping. Once I forget plastic silverware. We ate with small folding knives. Stirred food with a stick. It was fun being barbaric!

Sex outdoors is fun for multiple reasons, not the least of which is the the delicious push/pull between desire and worry about being caught. No wet spot in my down sleeping bag is a plus.

It's a dumb comment. Is she only wasting her time or does she want that kind of control?

She’s not the one for you, If it is something that you like and has become part of your persona, then she should take it as part and parcel of you. Anyone who would put such a condition on a person who otherwise they feel attraction towards must be a - very controlling and., b - very shallow. Find another more worthy of your affections. Incidentally, I think your well trimmed facial hair makes you look very handsome.

She wouldn't even try a little kiss? How does she know that you can't kiss tenderly without scratching her face or whatever it is that she is objecting to? Maybe she associates the facial hair with someone else, and that's her problem to get over, not yours. If your mustache and goatee is part of your style and look, then she can accept it or leave it.

Surely you wouldn't be so desperate for a kiss that you'd alter your looks for someone you just met! I'd say either give it some time (without giving in just yet) and see where the relationship is heading and if she's worth shaving your look off.

Maybe she was just nervous and said the first thing that came to her mind to avoid a kiss on the first date. Maybe she'll try a little kiss by date 3?

I wouldn't suggest shaving it off without a lot of consideration, which is obvious you are doing. Good for you.

I"m torn on this. I hate face rash, have always been with clean shaven, but if a short SOFT, clean, groomed beard have discovered I'm ok with that. Have to admit I'm not a fan of the neck beard trend going on.

It sucks if she really likes you save for that one thing. If that were me I'd try to decide how into them I was and then let them make the moves but definitely a chill in the air.

as an aside confessed to someone I was seeing that I'd always hated beards, but that his was nice. Over time began to notice his beard getting shorter....and shorter, and shorter. He didn't need to do that. It kind of makes me sad.
I'm so much help here right?
In any case I'm so sorry that happened to you. I looked at your pics & your beard is nice short & appears groomed. Of course there's no way to know from a photo if it's soft or not.

Curious what becomes of this situation & hope you'll update.

Its very simple...do you want your mustache/goatee more than making out then there you go, that's the answer you're looking for ?

Like someone already said, it's red flag time. For me that would mean to proceed carefully if i was really interested. LLOL

If a woman with whom i had a mutual attraction said that to me, instead of assuming anything, I would ask her reasons for wanting ”That stuff ... off my face." Then i would share with her how i felt about shaving off the mustache i've worn since the 70s.

There could be many options which she may just need to articulate. One option which quickly comes to mind is that your facial hair reminds her of a disliked ex; alternatively, she may just have sensitive skin and was afraid of whisker burn, anywhere.

Or, she could be just testing you to see how you would handle such a potentially conflictual difference between you.

If you are adequately interested in pursuing a relationship with her, having a non-threatening discussion would certainly give you more insight into her character, and what you might reasonably expect from her if you developed a deeper emotional relationship.

If you care.

Not a good sign. First it is the goatee and then.....who knows what is next!

I would ask her if you will be allowed the same freedom to dictate her shaving schedule. Seriously though, I could not tolerate any person thinking they have the right to control me in such ways.

The question is simply, do you want to suck face, or not?

...don’t know that guys will appreciate my thoughts, but about a weeks worth is all I'll carry.. Not into kissing guys, I don’t how women stand such thickets. Your call, though ~

I thought maybe you had food on your face or weirdly flavored chapstick! lol

In my opinion, no man is going to tell me how to wear my hair. If he prefers something, I will take that into consideration. On the flip side, I would never tell a man what to do with his hair either. I really don't care for a Duck Dynasty beard but so long as it's clean and neatly trimmed, she would deal with it. IMHO

tell her the exact thing YOU should HAVE DONE.hit the damn road.Unless you just want to spend your life doing what others want you to do and not being you.Use your brain,grow some balls

BIG RED FLAG. HUGE !!! Hitting you right in the face !

Unless of course, you're prepared to satisfy her every whim, and change who you are ...