So lets see you want to spite your mother and blame her for your sexual preferences you sound a lovely individual.

do you think doing something to spite another human being is going to be helpful to you? will it make you feel good except maybe for an instant? will it improve relations with your mom?

also, one doesn't become an atheist because someone tells you to go to hell. it's not a club that you join. you either believe there is a god or some gods, you don't believe there are any gods, or you're not sure whether there are any gods, and then you choose the word that best describes you (if you don't believe there are any gods, congratulations: you're an atheist.) you can acknowledge that something someone else did opened your eyes to the fact that there are no gods, but "i'm mad at my mom so i think i won't believe in any gods anymore" is a kind of strange concept. also, if you're going to "blame" someone for being attracted to men, you're concluding that there is something wrong with that, and therefore there's some blame to apportion. there are people who think there is something wrong with that, but you know what? those people are bigots. don't be a bigot against yourself. be who you are and understand that that's just who you are. if you find things about yourself you'd like to change, first find out whether they need to be changed and whether they CAN be changed. being gay is not one of those things. it's natural, the only harmful thing about it is how people may be prejudiced against you and how they may make you prejudiced against yourself (so don't let them do that!). as for having kids, there are enough kids. you don't have to produce more kids to be a good human being.

you do know that since there's no god, there's also no hell, right? your mom can't send you to hell. it's sad that you don't have a more understanding mom, but she is not a danger to you unless you let her be. be yourself.

g

You do you and tell her or not tell her what you want, not to spite her. Any choices you make are yours and not based on what other people think you should or shouldn't be. Also, your sexuality isn't from what someone's done to you, that's a part of who you are.

Back up a second - you are attracted to penis's and it's somehow your mom's fault - what? I understand how environmental issues can impact a person's self-image or self-esteem but at 41 if you're advertising for men, women and and trans women - you're gay and that's not environmental that's biological and hardly your mother's fault - it's not like she deliberately altered her genes to make you gay. You haven't come to terms with it and so a trans woman allows you to sleep better at night merely because of the wording - but the truth is - you're gay and you need to come to terms with that. It's OK - it's who you are - you don't need to seek validation from other people. Just embrace it and live your life.

I've often wondered if that has ever worked? Telling someone, or implying, that they are going to hell if they don't believe as you do always seems to have the opposite effect. Why would it be convincing?

I wan to know how she knows the census of hell

Were you exploring the Catholic faith?

That was one of the factors in my non-belief ( I was still a kid) but I just could not believe all the Jews, Muslims, Catholics would be punished for eternity by the one god for picking or being born to the "wrong" tradition even if they were really great people, That one could be a murderer but be saved by his grace if they repent but one could be a really decent human and burn because they never accepted him as their lord and savior. Made no sense.