Your experience is far worse than mine, and makes me feel sheepish to admit that I share your loathing for religion. It is not necessary or even helpful to harbor shame, however. In the end, from the point of view of an atheist, and even the agnostic, religion is not about a god or gods, but about the leadership and members who practice it. It is they who failed you, not religion itself. I blamed God for years before I finally realized he wasn't there to defend himself or accept the blame.

You are not ultimately responsible for the lives of others. I assume the divorce would have happened anyway. And whether you gave up the house and kids or not, their lives would have been affected. Maybe you would have done better by the children than your wife did, but you don't know that. You are only responsible for your own life. You can have an affect on the lives of your children, but in the end they have to live their own lives. I'm sorry things have been so awful for you and I hope your children's lives improve.

Reminds me of the old joke: instead of getting married, find a woman you don't like and buy her a house.

I, too, have done stupid things at the promptings of faith. The Bible says "faith maketh not ashamed"; I think the lost part of that verse was "but it maketh the wise simple, which is why they are not ashamed, until much later, when they wise up".

Anyway, do not blame yourself as if you were the sole cause of these things. Your wife and, yes, even your children, had roles to play, too. For all you know if your marriage had lasted you'd still be dealing with addiction or depression in the family. Do not be in thrall to the Christian notion that you could steer all that as "head of the household under god". Once Other People are involved, all bets are off.

I'm going to echo @Marionville here ... you did what you thought was right, and were true to the (insufficient) light you had at the time. This is not a regret, it's a disappointment. And don't kid yourself ... you didn't "know better" and couldn't, until you did.

Don't blame yourself. Unfortunate set of circumstances. I hope things are moving in the right direction for you now. I agree that propping up a book of lies for people to lean on in times of need has harmed many lives.

I'm truly sorry to hear that. I hope things have turned around.

So sorry about your kids, that was tough reading about them. I hope they are able to access help. Don’t beat yourself up too much, you are a victim too. You did what you thought was the right thing to do and with the best of motives. You mustn’t let the anger you feel towards the religion which you believed in and which you now know to be false fester. That would only be damaging to you and you deserve better. I know it can’t be easy, but try to look forward and not back....all of us are rooting for you and your daughters.

I'm sorry . We've all learned the hard way , that things we are taught as kids , just don't always hold water . You've learned a hard lesson . Move on . Hugs, hon .