Unpopular Opinion #2:
Two extremes don’t make a right. The #metoo movement is a long time coming, but in a haste for social justice, sometimes the victim can become the perp. Case in point is this tasty tidbit:
“If some innocent men's reputations have to take a hit in the process of undoing the patriarchy, that is a price I am absolutely willing to pay.” Emily Linden.
I have heard this from a few more women over the past few weeks. Sorry, you’ve now lost me. I was one of those innocent men. I got accused of sexual harassment and was on the verge on losing my job, before I showed proof of my innocence. Still I had to go thru a year of embarrassment and legal proceedings, before my accuser finally admitted it was made up.
Don’t be so set on getting the “man” that you close off allies to a cause.
Where there are opportunities there are opportunists. It isn't fair to judge a whole demographic on the actions of a few.
For some to take advantage of the #metoo movement is to be expected. Women are human too and it's no longer just a man's world.
No one should be victimized but it happens in all demographics. I'm sorry it happened to you and that you feel you must remove your support because of it. It doesn't change the fact that it is a widespread problem that needs to be addressed.
You have more allies than you might think. Many women have lost their jobs/careers for refusing their bosses advances by being falsely accused of insubordination, misconduct, and theft. They certainly can relate to your struggles.
I hope you will consider the whole picture and maybe change your mind. If not then again I'm sorry for what you have been put through.
As a professional woman went through it myself. No one should ever be accused unjustly. Twenty years ago if you complained about sexual harrassment you usually got fired and found another job.
Here is my take, I often speak out against police brutality. The response I get back often is: what about BLM? They are often violent.
The thing for me is: what does the data show? Is there a problem? Yes there is.
I’m not going to waste my time telling BLM how they should handle themselves. I’m not going to say they lost me because they aren’t advocating in the way I would like.
They literally can’t lose me because they weren’t the ones that found me to begin with. The problem found me, and that problem still needs to be addressed. What I am going to focus on is doing my part in addressing the problem. My focus is advocating for the change I want to see in the system to address the problem. I’m not going to waste my time telling other people how to advocate. It’s not useful. It’s a hopeless task. Movements are not homogeneous. You do you, I will do me.
I haven't been hit with that one, but I had my kids taken from me once because a friend of the ex told her how to go about destroying me. My kids were hysterical, they had been taken out of school and were staying at this friends house and I was not allowed to see them until after the court case. I won the case, the police and magistrate apologized, my ex was given a formal warning, after further cases I was granted sole custody of the children.
When things were at their worst, no-one would talk to me or be seen with me, I was labelled as violent, yet even in her claims, my ex didn't go as far as saying I was violent of physical with her or the kids, only that she was fearful. I was terrified I was going to lose my kids, society is quick to judge.
There are professional accusers and amateur victims and yet the truthfully damage being so great that only 1 in 20 cases sometimes is reported. We can't get off the responsibility and the shame of what has been done.