When someone says, "Bless you," what is a witty retort?
Retort with a "No You" the look on their face is priceless!
I say thank you. It's just a familiar phrase and the person is wishing me well. But what should we say when someone sneezes? Here are some options.
A) Wish you well
B) Now i'm infected
C) Did your heart stop?
D) You slimed me
E) I need an umbrella
F) A piece of your lung hit me
G) Brush your teeth
H) Use mouthwash
I) Something sharp hit me
J) Was that a blow dart?
K) Stop blowing me kisses
L) Have you had your shots?
M) Use a tissue
N) I can't see
O) Feel better now?
P) Your dentures are on the ground
Q) Sushi for lunch?
R) I smell sex and candy (for the ladies)
That's all i got.
"Just no holy water, please. That stuff burns."
I thank them.
They are conveying positive thoughts and energy towards me.
In the sneezing context, I hate the whole thing. I even hate that I feel obligate to say "excuse me" when I sneeze, as if I've committed some offense. I also dislike feeling obligated to say anything to anyone else who sneezes. The whole thing is dumb, IMHO.
Now the unsolicited "bless you," or "have a blessed day," just creates an awkward/uncomfortable situation for me. I usually just smile and say thanks and try to take it in the vein of "have a good day." My preference would be to give a sarcastic response of some kind. =]
"Thank you" or "likewise" why be witty to a kind gesture?