it works two ways. i see you're here for the dating half of the site, so i recommend that you browse through the groups and find some (and join them) that are about meeting people and dating. to wider your scope, browse the posts in the categories that interest you, make some pertinent comments, see who's on your page, so to speak. you needn't eschew the community half just because you're open to meeting someone special, right? when you have something to say about something (choose a topic that means something to you) go ahead and post. if you post in the groups you join, after reading posts to see what's going on, you may make some friends.

g