It sounds miserable for you! What would happen if you said "no thanks" to the books & changed the subject whenever he brought up religion?

Does he really deserve to feel better when behaves so disrespectfully towards you? If you are against lying, don't compromise your integrity He's treating you like a child.

Well that's all just my opinion--I know all to well how impossible it is to stand up to family members.

Ask yourself if you'd rather be right or happy.

Your father has no legitimate reason to be so controlling, but he has certain irrational reasons that are based in a kind of love for you (and on misplaced self-interest). That is to say, (1) he wants your soul to be okay and (2) he doesn't want to be guilty of failing as a parent, to successfully inculcate "correct" beliefs in you.

IF your father is not an insufferable asshat apart from his beliefs, or if you find his ass-hattery to be forgivable, then you might want to consider what it would TRULY cost you to accommodate him just enough for him to believe that your soul is properly dealt with. Does it actually cost you anything to pretend you marginally believe in his nonsense of choice? Particularly if he's very old and you don't have to do it for long.

It sound to me like you love your father and you could make the same choice as your brother has. I would seriously consider it.

My own father never found out about my unbelief before his death at age 87 in the year 2002. He knew that I wasn't attending church anymore but was willing to assume I was still a believer. I was willing to let him think so. It was made easier by the fact that he wasn't close enough to where I lived to be a daily part of my life, but I think I could have pulled it off anyway. I didn't see any reason to force an old man to accept a reality he couldn't abide. I like to think I made his death a little less angst-ridden. I don't feel that I gave up any of my personal integrity in the process.

Look at it this way: if you don't want your Dad so attached to his own rightness, why are you so attached to yours? Maybe you're more like the old man than you want to think. And maybe that's okay.

Whatever you decide is up to you, there's no right or wrong, but those are my thoughts for what they're worth.

Your Father is choosing to be all bent of shape over you. I would love him, and try to enjoy time together - but I would need to be the real me, and it may be time for him to bend a bit.

I would simply try to ignore all of his attempts at proselytizing and ANYTHING religious as if nothing was even said. I would remain in his presence only when religion was not mentioned.

Whichever road you choose is fine. There is nothing wrong with making an old man feel better. I don't believe in honesty for the sake of honesty. Especially in the matters of faith or non-faith.

Sounds to me like you're both of the same cloth. Both resolute in ones stance. I have no answer for this. Perhaps he is just entrenched by growing up in the religion. Good luck with this one.

No easy answer. No need to needlessly antagonize him, and you are entitled to be you. Hopefully you can avoid the discussion most of the time.

Your father is at least in his late 50s or 60s minimum. so he is pretty old, at this point is kind of useless to try to change him, it is difficult at this point to change a part of his persona so strong and deep as religion.
Just smile and wave, what is more important? Your relation with him or the discussion about something that you think it does not exist?
And I doubt you spend that much time with him to be a burden to pretend for some time.
Have fun, be more extremist than him (i love to do it with religious people and show that their religion is impossible to follow).
Give more time to the old man and less time to what he will never understand.
There is no divinity telling you to not follow YHWH, but your father's clock is tickling...

This is a hard position to be in. Theists just think that they have to be right. Look backwards in history to all those who believed and you know that makes it true. (Actually it does not.) This is how the believers think. My stepfather says that if I am right it means he doesn't have much of a future. OK, he's in his 80's so what do you think? I suppose it is normal when he passes to believe he went to a farm somewhere and everyone is happy.

I never brought the topic of religion up with my parents because I didn't think it was really worth creating a rift over. I figured if going to church once a week for an hour and going through the motions kept the peace then it was worth it.

I did hate being sent to a catholic school in the 5th grade though. As far as I was concerned, I was just fine in the public school and all of my best friends were there anyway. I creared a huge row over that one.

Fortunately, I had to go through the jebus charade less once I was out on my own. Just when I came back home for visits.