Do you take offense when the statement made on this site applies and fits you? Do you comment with a nasty reply or say, you know what it is time for a change that will benefit me in the end!
I only take offense with ignorance, especially willful ignorance and the spreading thereof.
Right on.
Everyone is entitled to there opinion here. This web site is more than sunshine and rainbows. I try to ignore the bad things to put less stress in my life. The positive things will give me a warm fuzzy feeling. If I got back at everyone that pissed me off, I wouldn't have any free time.
With there with U
I don't take offence but look into it if it really is something that I do or say. Sometimes I am wrong and have to acknowledge it but sometimes I am not. Some people are just simply nasty and horrible, just for the sake of it. I wonder what did happened to them to be so. If you for example look at the person who calls himself goldenvalleyguy. I wonder what happened to him to be so angry all the time.
It can be helpful at times.
if it applies and fits me, why would i take offense? but it hasn't happened yet. no offense, but y'all don't know me. lots of people who've never even talked to me as casually as this suddenly tell me ALL about myself in a reply. they're always, without exception, wrong (and nasty, too!) if they were right, i'd admit it. i'm still waiting for that to happen.
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@irascible amazing, isn't it? people either attribute their own habits, responses, characteristics, to everyone, or they think their small sample of acquaintances (giving them enough of the benefit of the doubt to grant, provisionally, that their powers of observation are adept enough even regarding the small sample) applies to total strangers everywhere.
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Some people just cannot accept any criticism just look at trumper.
@Marine yes some people. but what i don't understand is why that means it's automatically true of every stranger. i don't like it applied to me when it's not true. when something IS true, then fine, but in most cases, the extrapolations are for nothing. example: someone: bla bla bla me: i disagree someone: you get angry easily, don't you? (okay, if i disagree with something and stick to facts and not characterizations that means i'm angry? and if i WAS angry, that would mean i was QUICK to anger? i see this sort of thing all the time, attribution of emotion because someone took the time to respond to a post!) second example: someone: bla bla bla me: i disagree and here is why someone: oh you must have voted for trump/must be a liberal/must be very old/must be very young/must be single/must be married/must be [insert whatever that someone personally dislikes, despite no evidence] so yeah, a LOT of criticism SHOULDN'T be taken. it's not that hard to know which is which, and yet some folks have a hard time distinguishing among legitimate (for someone else), well meant advice that's not appropriate, inappropriate advice that is maliciously offered, and good advice. one doesn't receive that last as often as one would like, and sometimes one mistakes the first for the second.
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When I feel uncomfortable because something pricks my self-identification, I am trying to develop a habit of "leaning into" it (rather than turning away), really listening, without bias, and checking to see if there is something I need to work on there.
This is actually a huge, critically important and foundational element of my practice as a Buddhist. One might say it is essentially the entire practice, in a nutshell: how am I identified with this? How can I let go of this identification?
This would actually be an excellent topicmof discussion for "Dharma Café", for anyone who wants to go deeper/further with it.
I don't really pay attention to much of what is said about me here. There are maybe two people here who know me at all, and that is because we talked on the phone several times. Those are the only two people l feel l have any real idea of who they are. The rest of you are just words in black and white. No real personality. Sometimes l say things here just to see the reaction just like l do IRL.
Self criticism is very difficult to apply and take a positive reaction to. It means being true to oneself and attacking the flaws we know we have of which there can be many smoking, wt, being nasty, carrying a chip on your shoulder, gossiping etc. Age has a way with addressing some of these things if one wants to. You can call it wisdom, learning from your mistakes etc.What would be fantastic is if you could recognize these things earlier in life and therefore make your life more pleasant before you turn 80.
if it's someone else's statement, how is that, from the reader's pov, SELF-criticism?
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Mostly not, but it depends on what mood I'm in.