So, Shawn doesn't want me to move, huh ! I told he he has to quit the smoking, yet again, get help from his doctor to quit the binge drinking on his 3 day weekend, he can't stop, so he needs help and ask his doctor fo a referal for us to see a counseler or a therapist. I was filling out a rental application yesterday, when he said this to me ! I'm still looking !
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I keep looking for a place of my own that I can afford with my 2 cats, they are mine and I will not give thm up !
joantheloon
Level 6
Mar 7, 2019
0
Good for you. Reclaim your life while you can. Just because a guy wants you to spend all your energy for his comfort doesn't mean you should.
If you are happier without him, be strong and live your happy life.
Perhaps you can live apart but agree to go to counseling with him (while living apart) for both your sakes and/or also for your future partner's sakes.
Agree to some rules for when you are together and he can choose if he wants you or his habits. Sounds like he already has - but you need to be firm. And you are! 
Similar situation - broke up for nearly a year - slowly giving it another try while easing out of old/bad habits. Best he can do is not drink while he's with me, so that means our time together is short. 
Not sure a reconciliation is a good thing for us, but it's a chance to practice better and healthier habits, even if short lived. I agreed to give the relationship a chance, since I'm not seeing anyone else anyway, but I find I am pining for my year of freedom when I could do as I please and was so happy. Life is too short to spend on a bad relationship.
Julie808
Level 8
Mar 7, 2019
0
Sadly, with his issues, he will try to drag you back in every time you try to move on. You don’t mention if he has violent tendencies. If he does, that can make the returning dangerous, not just a mistake. You have your work cut out for you and some serious choices for your own well being to think about.
Barnie2years
Level 8
Mar 6, 2019
1
DId he smoke and drink before you moved in together?
Captain_Feelgood
Level 8
Mar 6, 2019
0
He didn't smoke, then, but he was using an Ecigarette then they got too expesive and he went back to smoking, which I new nothing about. Yes he did drink, but then so do I, just not anywhere near as much as he does !
Oh, I forgot to tell you this, He wants me off this site, right, I'll do that when he does what I've asked him to do. I would rather do without his sorry drunk ass !
joantheloon
Level 6
Mar 6, 2019
3
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