Agnostic.com

11 2

How bad is breaking up with someone via a text?

UrsiMajor 8 May 13
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

11 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

1

Only done it once when enforced by circumstance. Lady I was with was away a few days for work, when I was redeployed to an Asia backwater at a few hours notice. We had been together a few weeks and I knew it would be months before I was back. I gave her the option by text to wait or find somewone else...she had moved away before I was back, so never saw her again.

1

im the last 3 years, I’ve had three relationships end - 2 by text, one by ghosting.

I’m on a roll!

I got 1 by texting , 1 by ghosting and 1 by sea. I win.

@Remowill
One if by sea?
Were you dating Paul Revere?

@Haemish1 No, it was his mad sister. Paula.

1

Speaking as someone on the receving end....quite disrespectful, humiliating and still angers me today.

1

At that point , it probably doesn't matter long term.

2

Tacky and gutless. If you are in a relationship with someone, you owe them a face-to-face explanation. If you don't have the courage to do that, you shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone.

That was what I thought. The relationship we had must not have been what I thought it was. And they were over a year.

1

If it isn't a serious relationship, it depends on how long and why you feel the need to not tell them in person. I was in a 5 year LTR with someone who lived about a half hour away who cheated on me and then texted me to tell me "I fucked up. Please don't call me." And then blocked my number. I know she blocked my number because of course I called her for clarification... fucking cowardly. I don't know if she was worried I'd flip out or if she didn't want to watch my heart break in person. Either way, she got her wish. I guess that made it easy for her.

1

Perhaps, it's because I use texting so much that I consider it my main form of communication, but I say:

3

Depends. If you've been together a couple of weeks or so and only been on a couple of dates, it's a little shitty but not majorly bad. On the other hand, if you've been together more than ten years and married for five, then text your partner to say you've met someone else and give them 12 hours to pack what they can and get out, it makes you a bit of an arsehole.

As you may have guessed, I'm not discussing an entirely hypothetical situation here.

Jnei Level 8 May 13, 2019

That's fucked up. I'm sorry anything remotely like that happened to you.

@Kafirah Meh, I'm better off on my own. I'm still gutted about all my books, but hey - no need for that arsehole in my life.

@Jnei Agreed. It's good that you are good alone, but maybe leave room for someone who isn't an arsehole? The loss of books is always a tragedy 😟

@Kafirah Room can be arranged for the right person. If that person never appears, I'll just fill the room with more books and stuff.

@Jnei Good plan 🙂

2

Cowardly

bobwjr Level 10 May 13, 2019
1

It's rude and disrespectful, as is "ghosting."

I always have a conversation in person.

In person is out of the question. The loose cannon factor was starting to show after a dispute over holocaust death numbers. Don't know him well enough to estimate the potential.

@UrsiMajor

After meeting, I send the man an email if I'm not interested. I aim to be kind and respectful.

Only one man lashed out at me after I declined a second date.

1

Not very nice, for sure!

zesty Level 7 May 13, 2019
Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:346047
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.