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How to write holy texts
4 simple rules

St-Sinner 9 June 3
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0

Looks like Second Edition is warranted based on very passionate input of irreligilous members

1

It helps if you can insert a little King James English in there too! (e.g., thou, thee, etc.)

1

If your sacred tablets are not gold explain that your god is just starting out and he is not rich yet. Give him a chance anyway.

0

Good one funny

bobwjr Level 10 June 4, 2019
2

the meme shows jews, specifically, which is odd, because fear is not actually a driving factor in modern judaism. yeah i know it's not modern jews being shown, but since biblical times fear has not been the driving factor. in additiion, the people in the picture didn't write the text either, and they also do not look frightened. they're arguing a point. look up "pilpul." christians use fear as the driving force.

g

3

But put ambiguity into the sentences wherever possible, to allow conflicting "interpretations". That way the texts are always prescient.

Yes, Make it convoluded

2

Claim you found some gold tablets out in the woods.
Translate those tablets into the English of the King James era. You need not be a scholar of ancient languages. Say that angels made way with the tablets and that they are not available for study by professionals.

We will find all the bastards who are still spreading this shit and teach a lesson while they can chant all shitty scriptures to see if the angels can come back again. I guarantee that the imaginary God and angels won't show their ass ever.

I personally will sodomize God.

@St-Sinner It is enough to just speak out and give your opinion. Anger and hatred hurts only your self.

@WilliamFleming No, it does not. Anger and hatred have been the most powerful emotions behind the largest religious expansions in the history of mankind. The largest is called the -Christian Crusades that burned women and children alive at the stake for just not accepting Jesus and the imaginary God. Why is it not helpful? The history has shown they have helped tremendously accomplish greatest victories. We will now destroy this harmful and imaginary God and its hurtful and ignorant followers with anger and hatred.

@St-Sinner Hatred is not helpful because it spawns more and more hatred, snowballing into pure hell.

β€œDarkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

β€”Martin Luther King,Β Jr.

@WilliamFleming I am going to believe the examples in Christian history more than believe MLK. Christian Crusades have proven that violence, anger and hatred will achieve great victories. MLK mostly recycled thoughts of other people.

@St-Sinner I guess we’ll just have to disagree.

Wars are generally not fought in anger and hatred, they are fought for perceived self-interest. Anger and hatred in fact are detrimental emotions while fighting a war.

@WilliamFleming Christian Crusades were fought with hatred against the Pagans and others.

@St-Sinner And what was the result? Was Christianity brought to the Middle East and established as the predominant religion or were the crusaders eventually kicked out?

@WilliamFleming If Salahuddin did not kick the Christian ass, it would have but the end result today is 1 billion stupid believers. Not bad. I call it tremendous success.

0

#4 is absolutely crucial!

2

Not for nothing, but Nostradamus did the same thing. He didn't start a
religion around it, but he was just as fanatical about his writings.
How many millions of people believe his bullshit, too?

I fucking hate "holy" books.
ALL religion is evil.

2

Possibly 4 steps for the next religion?

  1. Relate a true story.
  2. Show it was inspired by nature and confirmed by the science of the day.
  3. Show people how to embrace and harmonize with it.
  4. Create symbols, rituals and holiday traditions that illustrate, remind and celebrate the hopeful truths in the story, with an aim for positive interaction and harmonious living, enshrining virtues and rebuking evil.

Please, no.

You cannot command obedience and following without fear. That is the missing ingradient.

@St-Sinner Well, the point being a religion that has participants rather than followers, in a true reality they see all around them, and a goal for peace and harmony rather than control and oppression. But if you're talking about religions with a supernatural deity, then yes, fear is a driving force. I was imagining a better way, since something is likely going to fill the void the current dying religions are leaving.

I love it.

2

I think fear is the biggest motivator

Yes! I am terrified of sky fairies and possibly evil clowns. 😎

@Science-guy Me too, especially those....thosr.... clowns 🀑.

@Geoffrey51 those killer clowns from outer space were pretty terrifying. Wait - are you saying that movie is not true ? πŸ˜€

@Ohub oh it’s true okay. It’s just not many people can see or hear them

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