Don't Tell Your Mother....
What's your "don't tell your mother" story?
When I was 4 my dad, an electrician, had to go into work on a Saturday to cover an emergency at a grain elevator, he took me with him. While he was working on the junction box nearby I climbed up on the steel chute bed to play. Dangling down from the equipment was a chain with a metal pine cone attached. I could just barely reach it.
I played by myself on the slippery shoot bed but after a while that pine cone was too tempting. When I grabbed it the chute opened and a shit ton of grain came gushing out, knocking me down and sweeping me off the chute bed to the floor. When I let go of the pine cone the trapdoor shut so I wasn't completely buried but I was scared and crying and covered in grain up to my waist.
Of course my dad heard the commotion and came running. He jerked me up out of the grain pile on the floor and asked me if I was alright. I cried, "yes". Then he beat my ass and sat me in the corner while he cleaned up the mess. Before we left he said, "Don't tell your mother or I'll beat your ass again."
There were quite a few times I heard, "don't tell your mother" over the years. 
17
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7 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.My brother and I had a pretty fraught relationship growing up, but we were both terrified of my dad. When I was about 7 and he was 10, he was playing golf with a practice ball in the back yard, and I was pretending to be a turtle, crawling around with a clothes basket on my back and the peg bucket on my head, generally getting in his easy and being a pain in the bum.
So he thought it would be a good idea to whack the bucket with his golf club.
Cue screaming, blood all over my face, a serious egg on my forehead and frantic begging.
"Don't tell dad, oh god don't tell dad, please, please don't tell dad..."
So I made up a cock and bull story about falling over (I was a clumsy kid, so completely believable), kept shtum and blackmailed my brother into compliance for three months until my big mouthed little sister got wind of the truth and blew the whole gaff.
Most rewarding head injury I ever had.
MrBeelzeebubbles
Level 7
June 27, 2019
1
First time my dad, uncles and grandfather let me and my cousin hang out with them for poker night, we were about 11 or 12....they gave us our first beers (cheap Natty Light-quality swill), probably thinking we wouldn't like it....but we did, so they let us have a few more
JordanG76
Level 4
June 26, 2019
1
Us parents learn by trial and error how to keep our children safe in all situations....glad you survived and sorry spanking was covering up your dad's error
GreenAtheist
Level 8
June 26, 2019
0
Every time I heard "don't tell...", I knew it wasn't for my benefit.
RileyStevens
Level 7
June 26, 2019
3
At age 15, I sneaked outside at midnight and skated alone on thin ice. Skating in the glittering path of the full moon, I felt exhilarated by speed, danger and exquisite beauty.
“Craack!” the ice shrieked beneath my feet. Long cracks fanned across the ice. Nobody knew where I was. “I’m lightweight,” I thought and skated faster.
It occurred to me that if I fell in, my dead body would wash up in the Spring, maybe never. Quickly I skated to the shore and made my way around the lake to home.
Never told a soul until age 35. “Don’t tell me that NOW!” my mother gasped, horrified.
LiterateHiker
Level 9
June 26, 2019
12
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