So Ive just restarted match. Im seeing alot of younger men contacting me saying they prefer older women. I guess Im now cougar age. So far I've told them no because I already have a son ( haha) and I'm assuming its a phase they are going through. Ladies what are your thoughts on this?
4
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17 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.Most guys I've gone out with have been younger than me. Those are the relationships that have actually lasted for some time. I have dated older but they just never seem to pan out. My good friend jokes with me saying, "You do like your odd numbers." Because all five of my long term relationships were with guys 1,3,5,7, & 9 years younger than me (not in that order). I have had more older guys, on dating sites, want to meet me without even reading my profile. That, to me, is annoying. I read theirs and there is little to no shared interests. Sometimes I think it's just about having younger arm candy with these guys. Especially when these guys are 60 & 70 year olds. Plus, I hate the stigma that surrounds an older woman and younger man. Men get "ataboy" comments, pats on the back, "nice job" comments, etc. when they start dating a woman 20+ years their junior but women get labeled cougars. I've actually been on a dating site for older women/younger guys and have met two decent guys. NOT looking for "sugar mommas" or "firsts". One was 29 the other 30, I just turned 50. I say go with what works. Age is just a number (within reason).
GrungeGirl90s
Level 5
Aug 12, 2019
0
Age is just a number for me. I happen to look about 15 years younger than what I am. Not my words, just about 99 % of the people I meet. Which, doesn't really mean shit, in the long run. I fall for women that carry their age well. 40, 50, 60, whatever. Truthfully, I prefer the beginning of the scale, but it all depends on the total package. By the way,that picture of you in black is really attractive to me. You should be ok, lol. But, the thing about web sites is..........who is going to go through the process of presenting one's self, putting it out there, hoping a decent person replies, willing to travel, etc., etc., etc.
Guess that's my way of saying I've given up trying to make it happen via websites, lol.
If I ever had the luck to see you in real life, I think both our searches would be over.
It's.kind of funny because I've never been inspired to comment more than a few words.
What's happening???
Keech
Level 5
July 14, 2019
0
You are being agist - you may find one of these poor unsuspecting fools - sory, intellectual young men -- will be your perfect toy boy - try it, if you enjoy it try it again, and if not for you move on again
ShadowAmicus
Level 8
July 14, 2019
0
I want a man near my age. Not interested in a youngster.
The Vietnam War, civil rights, women's rights, voting rights, establishment of the Environmental Protection Act, sex, abortion rights, drugs, rock and roll, youth revolution, the assassinations of President John. F. Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X and much more.
This formed who were are and provides rich topics for discussion.
LiterateHiker
Level 9
July 14, 2019
2
Ive dated older guys who avoided all of these topics or philosophical/ societal conversation bc they said they wanted to focus on the positive now whatever that means. Also they played video games.... like on a date. Just saying.
@Lauraleigh39 I'm probably their age, but I love discussing intellectual and historical stuff. You need to find men who are intellectuals and not couch potatoes.
I met a guy through mutual friends & we started dating. He was a homeowner, kids in early teens, long term employment w/same employer. I pegged him for late 30s, early 40s. Evidently, he pegged me for same. Imagine our surprise when we found out there is a 20 year age difference. We've been dating over 6 years now. Because our work schedules are direct opposite, we both own homes, among other things, this arrangement works well for us at this time. We'll see what happens down the road.
SallyInStitches
Level 7
July 14, 2019
0
It is great that the FSM spoke to a Physists!!!
gsiamne
Level 8
July 14, 2019
0
What does FSM stand for and what is a physists?
@mooredolezal The FSM is the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I'm not sure what a "physist" is. I suppose it could be a "physicist," but I don't understand @gsiamne's meaning in any case.
When I was in my 50s, I tried a little bit of online dating. Lots of younger guys 20+ years my junior contacted me. Some were admittedly looking for a sugar mama and some just wanted to add an easy notch on their bedpost, to gain experience, and I'm guessing maybe participating in a game or contest with their friends, who likely laughed about all the older women conquests.
At the time, men my own age seemed only to be seeking women much younger. Seems everyone wants to date younger. A few old guys contacted me, crudely admitting they were just after sex, and that didn't interest me at all.
I ended up with a fellow just a few years younger than me and dated for several years. At least we had a few things in common. Not much in common with the super young guys.
I say have fun if that's what you want. Don't let age bother you, but beware of any ulterior motives from the younger ones. Personally, I'd prefer someone close to my own age.
Julie808
Level 8
July 14, 2019
1
The vast majority of women in my area from Match who are in their 50s are only interested in dating younger or at most a few years older than them. What that tells me could be one or more of three reasons. One, they are just out to play and have fun, just after sex and not any serious relationship or LTR. Two, it could be they are assuming all men over 60 have ED and don't want to deal with that. Three, they feel the men who are much older than them are too rigid or controlling, not open-minded or flexible enough about how much time the woman needs to make for them around the woman's work and kids, along with the men not being pro-feminist or PC enough for them.
Of course, this goes both ways, as men were already doing this long ago, dating only women way younger than them. Doesn't make it fair or right, but it's all about what you have to offer and what you can get in the dating market, whether it's looks, money, or both.....
I am 65 and I do get younger men saying the same. What do they want a grandma for I wonder.
Jolanta
Level 9
July 14, 2019
0
THHA:
Maybe they are looking to replace their mom, who cannot be with them. Seriously, my younger brother . . . baby of the family . . . one morning I arrive at work . . . he had been staying with me until I started telling him christianity was bull shit, then he moves out, and I have not heard from him for about a week. So as I said, I come in to work in the morning, about a week and a half after he moved out, and my friend David says to me, "Hey, did you know Kevin got married?" And I am like, "Oh fucking hogwash!", but he says, "No, he really did get married.", and this guy, if he says something like that I know he is serious, so I am like, "What the fuck! . . so he gets married, and, is to ashamed of it to bother letting me know?" So David goes on and tells me that he met her in church, and she is about ten years older than he is, he was about 26 at the time. She is a religio-nazi, and I pretty much could not ever stand her. But I know him, and that is exactly what he was doing.
I'm regularly playing with guys of my children's age. Some of them much younger than my kids. I like them young, hot, sensual and ready for a few rounds.
zesty
Level 7
July 13, 2019
2
Haha! Go for it!
I'm just wondering where the hell the expression "cougar" came from . . . . given that we are animals too, why didn't they call it, elephant, chimpanzee, orangutan, leopard? Ha ha ha.
THHA
Level 7
July 13, 2019
1
Yes, I am wondering that to, and get rather angry about it. They never would say a thing like that about a man. It seems demeaning to me.
THHA:
Judging by some of these comments, it sounds to me like they do not need to do any "prowling".
Cougar is another concept that has been completely bastardized in recent years. If you've ever seen a mature woman hunting younger men in a social setting you would understand where the term started. You can watch their eyes and body language and literally see them hunt down prey like something out of national geographic. lol. Now the term just means a woman of a certain age.
@Jinx5555555 Mrs robinson was def a cougar!
Wait on someone real . Just like you. Someone else with a child . Someone with love in them.
Bigwavedave
Level 8
July 13, 2019
0
Ive dated men with kids that were unaffectionate and made me feel objectified and unvalued. Just saying.
But im waiting away no worries. Hopefully when i find them ill still know how to have sex. Lol
@Lauraleigh39. Okie dokie...
Not necessarily a phase. I have always found 40 to be the most beautiful age for a woman. I married a woman 19 years older than me when I was 22. I’m nearing 50 now and still think 40 yo’s are the hottest. Could be a phase for some but it isn’t a forgone conclusion.
JacobMeyers
Level 6
July 13, 2019
1
Young boys expect to spend less money upon older women
GreenAtheist
Level 8
July 13, 2019
0
That is probably often or usually true, first, because the older women often have more money than the younger guys, and, secondly, there is probably an expectation that the older woman should expect to "pay" or sacrifice a bit financially compared to how much she would expect an older man to spend on her in exchange for better sex or enjoying a younger man's body......My guess is these are unspoken assumptions on the part of both the younger men and the older women....
@TomMcGiverin women; boys are not worth the time money or effort
.....washboard abs or hairless chests cannot be that sexually exciting when a Feminist Atheist elder or your age is bound to listen and learn how to please you
I'm not old enough to have an opinion on this subject except to say, I prefer guys my age + - 5 years....
Cutiebeauty
Level 9
July 13, 2019
2
I think that is probably very common. The younger a person's age, the narrower the age range of who they want to date, and appropriately so, since the younger you are, the less mature most of us are as well as how prepared we are to adjust to what life throws at us, since we have less experience to draw on and guide us. The older and more experienced we are, the better we can understand and relate to someone who is much older or younger, because, at least with most of us, the older we get, the more empathy we are capable of. Most of the very young these days have way less empathy than most who are much older, which is partly a result of age and culture. Empathy can help bridge differences in age within a primary relationship, even tho it will not erase differences in experience.
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