been a depressive for many decades. the only way i can overcome depression is to stay so busy that i don't have time to think about it.
must admit that 3 drinks in the eve put me in a mellow mood for a while.

I like what Varn sais "in some way, we are all defective..."
I have dysthymia and faced rock bottom about 9y ago. Been going to therapy for about 7y and event psychiatry for 1y. It feels like an endless fight, and maybe it is, so I try my best to accept it is part of me and keep going. As rogueflyer sugested, try different professionals until you find someone that can really help and always remeber there is nothing wrong in feeling bad or empty or even useless.
The part that gets us is the feeling part. Even in the middle of a freaking awesome day we can feel like crap. Remeber, you are not a bad person and you have value! Talk to friends, seek help, just remember that feeling bad don't mean you are! And take your time to recover, its a process and it doesnt mean weakness at all!!
I think I can say for everyone here that we wish you the best of luck and lots of good and relaxing days still to come! Never is to late!

Have you had your DNA and hormones tested? Doctors like to throw diagnoses and drugs at people which often make them worse. My friend was diagnosed similarly and she found out she had MTHFR genetic defect and a hormonal imbalance which after this was addressed she was able to get off drugs and do things that are proven to make people happier like exercise, getting out in nature, listening to music, dancing and singing, etc. Smiling is another thing makes you happier because it tells your brain that you are happy. Why not get a dog? You’ll get unconditional love and exercise! I am not trying to be superficial but just give you some suggestions that I have seen work.

I have been where you are and at about the same age. Since then (30 years later) I have learned a lot about myself and my self worth. Sometimes life is overwhelming and we take that on. Go easy on yourself, relax and try to get back to where you want to be. My heart is with you.

Pillows are great. Here is one i like.

I still bring up mistakes I made fifty, sixty years ago. I know it's self defeating and others probably don't remember it but me. In reality when I screw up others probably forget about it the next day. I think we tend to think about mistakes we have made and seem to forget about the good we do. It may be that self criticism is a sign of our desire to be a better person. The future gives us the opportunity to do small things that can make the world a better place. Please seek help from a therapist. That shows true strength. Be well.

No just human, I can empathize, I have struggled with depression my whole life, All we can do is accept it is a part of who we are, that it contributes to what makes us a whole and complete person.
It is not being defective it is being unique and an individual, which of course is never easy but ultimately worthwhile.

In some way ..we’re all defective.. Stay with us ~