There is a story told by Winston Churchill in his biography that while on a train as young officer one of his companions was being noisy and troublesome. So the CO threw a bible at the man and told him to sit still and read every word of it.
The chap reluctantly began to do so, however after a few minutes he began to giggle, whistle and make appreciative comments.
Finally the CO lost his temper and demanded to know what the junior officer found so amusing.
"I never read the bible before sir," he replied. "It's wonderful, wish I'd read it years ago."
"Well good," said the CO "Which part do you like best?"
"Oh this God characters sir," came the reply "He's great what a fucking bastard!"

Do you read Greek and Hebrew?

You are a little late. A long time ago someone who thought he was a good Samaritan handed me the book on my first flight overseas, I opened, closed rather quickly and waited until the air hostess came to collect the trash and threw it in with other trash where it fit.