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Who you are vs. what people see

Like most we are constantly evolving and changing and growing and maturing. My teen phase to my young adult phase to my 30's and now in my 40's are all different. I went thru several transformations in my late 20's to mid 30's, some good and a couple of new bad habits. I am not the same person I was in my teen or 20's. Those were very rough times but they help shape who I am now.

My DNA, life experiences, culture, environment, parenting style of my parents and my life decisions & consequences all shape who I am now.

So what a person might say about me depends on what part of my life continuum they experience with me. What phase of my life they came in contact with. Even what role they play in my life also. Some people have a small role in my life and only know a narrow view of me.

Collectively if you put the big stakes and small stake role people thoughts of me together I think it still would not give you no more then 15% of who I am. But it is worth exploring how you come off to other, how the perceived you because if 9 out of 10 people sees a certain bad or good trait in you that you do not see, then it might just be true. I am constantly trying to better myself.

We can not see how we come off to other, which is the unknown part about us.

There are three parts the SEEN, UNSEEN, AND UNKNOWN!

We have the seen part (what we see and show that other see), the unseen (what we seen and known in our self that other people do not know), and the Unknown part (what other people can see that we can not see) and if we ignore the unknown then we are doing our self an injustice in our growth potential. So even that 15% that I believe that people see of me, is very important to me to help me learn more about myself.

Please remember that the unknown is just as importance to try to find out….and it could be driven by the unconscious. Behaviors we exhibit with out us even knowing we are doing.

Sylvester-Lavell 3 Mar 28
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5 comments

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0

My problem is that I see my self negatively, so I figure everyone else sees me the same way. I find it hard to engage with people because I think they're just trying to be nice.

0

Well written. I learned about Joharis Window in college. I use it a fair amount in my practice

2

Yes we evole with time and the surroundings, but do not change for others change for your self always striving to be better than yesterday small steps and be consistent
Everyone told me I was living a dream and always talking and they knew I would and could not do it the society was always belittling me. It was not what the society wanted me to do but was my desire my drive that I can and will do it -
I started small steps and but consistent and at the ripe age of 53
I scaled not one one but two peaks the highest mountian in the world east and west of Nepal The Mighty Everest in the east and Annapurna in the west all in all only very few in the world will scale them both back to back I did both in 31 days
I felt so humbling and I learned something very profound up in the mountains -respect
Yes- Respect everything, everyone and every living soul So fellow friends If I can do it you can do it nothing is im posible all is possible set your dream and pursue in small steps and evolve with the flow of time and river you will reach and experience a journey that you will never forget nor can anyone take it away from you.

Rosh Level 7 Mar 29, 2018
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I recently found out most of the things I faulted myself for in my 54 years of existance weren't my fault. I now get to explore and find out who I really am, at this juncture anyway. It's like having a blank slate and I get to choose what goes on it, be it good or bad. Perhaps now I can see what truely is nature vs nurture in my case. I hope I turn out alright.

1

The TV series "Dr. Who" came up with one great insight: past reincarnations of the Doctor come together every few years. Each one is a different person, with a different personality, and different skills and knowledge. And that is a great metaphor for everyone: as we go through life, we become different people. I was a silversmith in the 1990ps, for instance. If you handed me some silver and a blowtorch and saif "Go to it" I's just scratch my head.

I believe that what people see of me is just parts of a broken mirror: together, they could assemble a picture that closely resembles me, but the bulk of the pieces are in my possession.

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